The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[sickwithu]

1,5 year relationship. She cheated, no forgiveness, we talked for some while, she didn't even try do anything, just making excuses, blocked fher rom social networks.

DAY 3.

 

[noBSgames]

Ex tried to get me to break NC again yesterday she saw I posted a video of my car up and she said "I'm still waiting on my ride" next thing I knew she had deleted her message however I took a screen shot I never responded.

 

[Roober]

1,5 year relationship. She cheated, no forgiveness, we talked for some while, she didn't even try do anything, just making excuses, blocked fher rom social networks.

DAY 3.

Brutal man! My buddy is in a similar situation, except from a marriage of 10 years and two kids. It's unfortunate that so many people do this. You will be better in the long run, time to focus solely on yourself.

 

[damnit]

Hi, I'm new here. Got dumped and cheated a month ago. Was also lied to to keep friendship because she was acting she feels terrible while she ****ed this other dude and still ****s him.. So it's a no contact day 1 for me..
I was never in this kind of situation, hopeless than ever so much that I don't have a will to live. Was in many relationships before and this stroke me so much I cant even explain. I had only her, and I'm unemployed, no friends here, living in a village after losing a job.. And know lost confidence, I don't know how I can move on.. Would like some support, you may think I'm acting like a *****, it was the first time i was actually giving myself in to a relationship. Helped her in every way possible. Devastated as I confronted her today and she admitted . She wanted to keep me for friendship while doing other guy, how low is that. Making excuses, telling she loves me and that she needs time, and me, I know all this rubbish, and i ****ing fell for it.. Told her I hate her.. didn't actually help. How to believe in karma or anything while she knows my life is a piece of ****.. And I don't have strength to go on..

 

[RedScorpion]

That's the danger of putting so much weight of your life on one person (advertently or inadvertently). If **** hits the fan (and it does with literally every relationship, unless you're together for the rest of your life) - then you're left with not much else.

First things first. You will feel like **** for now. But you will get better. It will take time, so allow yourself that time to heal. No contact will help you heal, as you have no new information about them... they will fade away eventually.

Focus on rebuilding yourself outside of her or any girl. You need friends. You need a job. You need a life for yourself.

Get a job where you're not just by yourself. You'll make friends that way as well as money. Start working out... good for self-esteem and also endorphins, will make you feel better. Also, pick up some sort of hobby, preferably one that interacts with others.

 

[noBSgames]

My ex tried to contact me again yesterday.. first facetime.. then a call and voicemail.. she tried to say it was her cousin that did it and she text me saying "don't think I called you that was XXXX that called you"

 

[damnit]

That's the danger of putting so much weight of your life on one person (advertently or inadvertently). If **** hits the fan (and it does with literally every relationship, unless you're together for the rest of your life) - then you're left with not much else.

First things first. You will feel like **** for now. But you will get better. It will take time, so allow yourself that time to heal. No contact will help you heal, as you have no new information about them... they will fade away eventually.

Focus on rebuilding yourself outside of her or any girl. You need friends. You need a job. You need a life for yourself.

Get a job where you're not just by yourself. You'll make friends that way as well as money. Start working out... good for self-esteem and also endorphins, will make you feel better. Also, pick up some sort of hobby, preferably one that interacts with others.

Yeah, the sad thing is that I knew what I'm supposed to do, I know it now, I actually brought this to myself, just didn't want to believe it.
I would say the same thing to others, it's just harder when it comes to yourself.. I know what should I do, but was doing exact the opposite.. When you experience enough of relationships and you've been with some decent girls and crazy lunatics , you learn. But then again, out of fear, you begin to think, no way, not again.. It will get better, after a while you feel ashamed for feeling like this and think with reason. And thanks for support. It never actually gets easier when it comes to break ups and betrayals, you just feel to cope with it better than when it's your first time in my opinion.. Take care everyone.

 

[noBSgames]

Ex hasn't contacted me back again "yet" but I'm sure she's going to find some BS way to try to.. last time was her little cousin called me and she sent a text after saying don't think I meant to call you.. last time she tried to ask my friend about me.. my birthday is next month so I'm sure that's going to be another time she will try to contact me.

 

[Roober]

Ex hasn't contacted me back again "yet" but I'm sure she's going to find some BS way to try to.. last time was her little cousin called me and she sent a text after saying don't think I meant to call you.. last time she tried to ask my friend about me.. my birthday is next month so I'm sure that's going to be another time she will try to contact me.

Good job man, keep it up! If you feel like it is hindering your growth, maybe consider blocking her!

 

[noBSgames]

I guess she thought I was going to break down and try to contact her? Wtf it's funny she's been contacting me more or trying to find out about me more now then ever before.. I have spoken in indirect ways by saying how much better off I've been.. I built my motor myself I dropped it in myself and I've drove it around which made her livid because that was her way to control me..

Let me tell you almost 4 years of not driving it feels effen good!!!

 

[SayWhat]

Some thoughts I have on NC.

In the past before I knew this forum I had a horrible break up and kept in contact with her as much as possible. I did some pretty pathetic stuff (showing up at her window in the middle of the night,...). I still see her from time to time and I still ‘ignore’ her because I’m ashamed of everything I did. In this case NC would have worked wonders.

But.

After I knew this forum I went through another break up and went NC. She did tried to reconnect after a few months, but I’m still left with anger towards her. No doubt that NC fastened the recovery process but in my opinion you need to tell her the truth that she’s a *****, a ****,... (they all are). And then go NC unless she starts acting out you tell her all again.

Long story short, NC is in some cases and for your own good a bit too much, but can do wonders. It’s just a matter of knowing when to do what.

 

[damnit]

Broke NC by replying to her sick messages.. And btw I realized too late I'm dealing with a BPD person, I didn't want to believe it.. If you ever come across this kind of person, Run and never look back, you can't fix them, no one can. I'm actually relieved she is not contacting me anymore. I guess I wanted closure, I don't want it anymore , I can't be sure anything she ever says is truth anymore.
NC day 5.

 

[jbl888]

Broke NC by replying to her sick messages.. And btw I realized too late I'm dealing with a BPD person, I didn't want to believe it.. If you ever come across this kind of person, Run and never look back, you can't fix them, no one can. I'm actually relieved she is not contacting me anymore. I guess I wanted closure, I don't want it anymore , I can't be sure anything she ever says is truth anymore.
NC day 5.

Hey bro, I feel you on this one. I finally blocked her on all social media. I feel mine is the kind that would all of a sudden say she's pregnant lol. I been getting text messages from a several random numbers asking how I am doing. Don't even reply. Just move on. I started eating healthy and exercising at least 3 times a week, which I recommend. I was thinking about rebound *** but screw it, I rather focus on myself and get my s**** together before I go out again.

 

[damnit]

Hey bro, I feel you on this one. I finally blocked her on all social media. I feel mine is the kind that would all of a sudden say she's pregnant lol. I been getting text messages from a several random numbers asking how I am doing. Don't even reply. Just move on. I started eating healthy and exercising at least 3 times a week, which I recommend. I was thinking about rebound *** but screw it, I rather focus on myself and get my s**** together before I go out again.

Man, don't worry about it, she will eventually come up with something lol, mine already lied to me she is pregnant with another dude, to suddenly change the story she got her period. They lie so good. I laughed , what else could I do. She just blames you for everything, you could turn upside down and it won't be enough, I just wish i realized it sooner because I think before real symptoms occur it can take a year or more because all girls act pretty much the same at some times. Then all of a sudden, she ****s with your mind, makes you go crazy, and then accuses you for being a douche bag. There is nothing you can do my friend, I've been with crazy b...ches.. but never BPD. She realized I wan't nothing from , a few days no messages, she enjoys the new guy until she screw him over, good luck to him. No, rebounds won't do any good in my experience, you can end in a rl with a rebound easily and screw yourself more, and that person also. Day 6 I guess.
Oh, and you can just see how they respect the other guy by writing to you , telling you they love you, cry and all that ****, but keeping the guy. And they can't understand it's wrong. just run.

 

[noBSgames]

My ex for the past few days have been putting up pictures when we were on vacation in FL last year.. for what reason I don't know why.. she even was bold enough to post a video when I was doing her makeup.. it's gotta look so stupid to her friends.. unless they are brainless and stupid.

 

[Roober]

My ex for the past few days have been putting up pictures when we were on vacation in FL last year.. for what reason I don't know why.. she even was bold enough to post a video when I was doing her makeup.. it's gotta look so stupid to her friends.. unless they are brainless and stupid.

You should really remove her from her social media. The fact that you still look at it says you aren't completely detached; a very dangerous place to exist. It is best if she is out of sight and out of mind.

 

[RedScorpion]

This is why you at least minimum unfollow them (if not just straight unfriend them). There is zero positive information that can come from looking at their social media. Either it's them having fun (negative), doing normal stuff, living their life (negative to you). Could be moping around and crying outwardly. Even this stuff posted directly involving you - it's negative, because it's all saying "Oh, she's still alive and such, and posting **** about me - why hasn't she reached out?". And ultimately getting you to think about her, and reprocess her entirely.

 

[noBSgames]

it's only worse because my mom is like oh look at what she posted today.. it's like ugh let the &%$$% do whatever she wants to do I don't want to be apart of that crazy mess

example.. today I guess yesterday she posted she was thankful for getting married or whatever.. my mom tells me about it and it's all some of my friends like wow you got married?? Then that leads them to wondering what happened between her and me.. she still playing games IMHO.. I tell you one thing I will never take a picture of a girl by herself if we are on a date.. that's going to be a red flag in my book.

 

[Gan]

I have been acting needy to a girl that I was seeing for a few months, and recently she has stopped messaging me. I was digging myself a deeper hole everytime I talked to her because I would initiate every conversation and I knew she would always respond. We messaged each other every day, and I now realize this was a huge mistake because we ran out of things to talk about. We would talk about the same things every day and I knew she was getting bored/annoyed, yet I still wanted to message her.
I messaged her after a few days of a random NC and she seems very uninterested. If I message her again then it'll kill all chances I have, if any. Right now I'm hoping that staying off each other's radar by going NC will make her miss me. She started with a really high interest level so my chances of her contacting me might be good.
I've been trying to cope with the NC by getting high and playing video games on my free time to stay distracted. I also work out and run on a regular basis, as staying in bed all day will definitely make me feel down. I occasionally hang out with close friends, this also helps.

This'll be day 2 of NC.

 

[Hiccup]

Hey Guys I want to start No Contact to my Crush.

I have been chatting with her since last 2 years on and off. She knows I like Her a lot. But as usual, it is only my feelings. I have constant urge to talk with her ,chat with her even I don't get a decent reply. Now I can't do this anymore. It is very hard for me to control that urge whenever I come across funny joke , or any other shareable content I want to send Her. This is bull**** I know but it is what it is.

I tried many time this no contact thing even have done successfully for 2 months but then again I go nd talk with her. Recently One of her friend's sister said to my friend that she changes boyfriend like changing clothes. So I passed on this message to her and I am getting decent replies due to that but I want to stop this bull**** now.

I was only messaging her on instagram so I asked her to block me so That I can't see her profile and message but she was not ready to do that. So I said I will delete my instagram account. but again she said no u will not do that. But I did that because It was just painful. So now I am starting this challenge.

she will contact me about what her friend's sister said about her what will I do then ?? will just give an answer with few words.

Now when I think about her I have huge anger in me because why I kept messaging her even I was not getting anything in return. keep giving attention and all. I am just angry with myself more than anything else. WHY I GAVE POWER TO HURT ME TO SOMEONE.