The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[finality]

Deleted her from social media and then sent one last text that I thought I deserved better than a ghosting. Bye.

No contact day 1 boys

 

[resilient]

Deleted her from social media and then sent one last text that I thought I deserved better than a ghosting. Bye.

No contact day 1 boys

I wouldn't have text that last zinger.

Anyway.... good for you for deleting her from social media. Never be tempted to lurk or snoop once you've severed the cord. She's a part of your past now.

Now is the time to look forward and be strong...

- Stick to your strict discipline of NC.
- Hit the gym/exercise/cardio to get into shape (or to get into even better shape).
- Work on all other various aspects of your life.
- Take up/resume hobbies/interests you've meaning to get around to.

 

[Rxnxg]

Deleted her from social media and then sent one last text that I thought I deserved better than a ghosting. Bye.

No contact day 1 boys

Happy to hear that, and also I agree with resilent, your last text should have been something actually "good", like just telling her how you feel and telling her that you need time. But it doesn't matter at all, time to enjoy life and be happy again.

 

[MrAddiction]

Happy to hear that, and also I agree with resilent, your last text should have been something actually "good", like just telling her how you feel and telling her that you need time. But it doesn't matter at all, time to enjoy life and be happy again.

No. That is definately wrong. His also Text should at least no been a Text at all. There was no Need to Text her anything. It just Shows her, you care and she still has a grip an you.
Ignoring her ghosting would turn the Situation around and make her hamster spin. But Even that should nötig be important. She is an ex. And the day the former girlfriend becomes an ex, everythings about her is uniteresting. It does nötig matter what she thinks, does, might think or might do.
And as stated way often before: Never ever go back to an ex.

 

[MrAddiction]

@soulforge
Watch this and other vids of this guy. Somebody posted a Link to one of his vids here and i watched many of his and it Helped me tremendous. You know we have or had kind a similar Situation getting over the Ex.

He Talks about the addiction to the x because of the permanant highs and lows. She was the poison and offered the cure for that same poison in one person. She made you suffer and then was there to be your nurse. I can not find that special vid - but they are all worth watching.

Watch his vids. He knows about this shyt.

 

[soulforge]

@soulforge
Watch this and other vids of this guy. Somebody posted a Link to one of his vids here and i watched many of his and it Helped me tremendous. You know we have or had kind a similar Situation getting over the Ex.

He Talks about the addiction to the x because of the permanant highs and lows. She was the poison and offered the cure for that same poison in one person. She made you suffer and then was there to be your nurse. I can not find that special vid - but they are all worth watching.

Watch his vids. He knows about this shyt.

Hey Mr Addiction thank you for the video man.. really appreciate this...

I am trying to look at it exactly the same way, as an addict coming of a nasty drug...

Will watch both videos, i am sure they will be a great help

 

[attic]

I think you tried everything that was in your hands to get her back, but the NC rule is not about getting her back or not, it's about you being fine. I'm not in position to tell you that since probably i'm ****ing up more than you, but you have to think about yourself and let her go.

If she really loves you she will come back to you after you're done with the no contact, and i'm sure that without the pain you're feeling now you will be able to talk with her better, and decide if you really want to try or not to be with her if there is any possibility.

Best regards,

This is well said. It's about getting yourself back so you can be the guy you want to be and attract women who meet you on your healthy level.


I'm now on day 37 NC. I have had my bouts with wanting to establish contact. Part of this with me is that I know I could get her back,... and so I'm realizing I'm in control. I'm just now beginning to decide I don't want it, NC has been pivotal.

You can still be a great guy while ignoring a toxic woman. Not rocket science.

Mr Addiction has the right advice here. Only thing I would add is that, it remains a choice with how you handle an Ex. It's your responsibility to make the best choice.

Thanks for the vids.

 

[finality]

ex texts me "im not ghosting you"

thats it.. nothing else in the text.

 

[Reboot2017]

ex texts me "im not ghosting you"

thats it.. nothing else in the text.

Uh oh... She is baiting you to validate her... Don't fall for it. As hard as it is, block her instead and thank yourself 2 months down the road...

 

[Rxnxg]

1 Day NC - It's not really my first day, since I've been not talking to her or answering shortly since around 1 week ago, so far she messaged me everyday. But yesterday she didn't say a word.

I guess she replaced my attention with another guy's, kinda feels bad and sad that she took such little time to replace me, but so far I feel OK. I guess after all I deserve better than a person that can replace you in 1 week or just wants attention.

 

[dustmuffin]

ex texts me "im not ghosting you"

thats it.. nothing else in the text.

and why should you care? You are done with her. Move along.

 

[dustmuffin]

1 Day NC - It's not really my first day, since I've been not talking to her or answering shortly since around 1 week ago, so far she messaged me everyday. But yesterday she didn't say a word.

I guess she replaced my attention with another guy's, kinda feels bad and sad that she took such little time to replace me, but so far I feel OK. I guess after all I deserve better than a person that can replace you in 1 week or just wants attention.

I know how you feel. It happened to me. Move along. Find other girls. Don't fixate on your ex.

 

[Tecton]

Broke 43 days of NC
Want her back!

I need some advice asap guys.. My gf left me 50 days ago, and ignored my texts after that and even blocked me. So I've gone no contact for 43 days. I want her back though...

So when I saw that she has unblocked me on Facebook, I wrote to her today... Actually I was just going to see if she would respond..... Since she totally ignored me for some days before I stopped contacting her and going NC.

I said
"Hey there *name*"
And then 1h later I sent "there's something important, can we take a walk on Monday 16:00?"
Me trying to say something that she's too curious to ignore. But it was not smart enough hahah

4h later she said "what's important? I've moved on"
How do I go from here? I only said that to see if she would respond lol... Now I'm stuck.
Idk, I think I am overthinking it.. But why would she unblock in 1st place and then later respond , if she "moved on"?

I'm thinking about letting some time pass before responding, to make her more curious and hopefully maybe she says something more.. If not, I was thinking about covering up the lie with something like "that's not what I meant. It's something important that I can't take on text"

Help a lost bro out lol

 

[Rxnxg]

Broke 43 days of NC
Want her back!

I need some advice asap guys.. My gf left me 50 days ago, and ignored my texts after that and even blocked me. So I've gone no contact for 43 days. I want her back though...

So when I saw that she has unblocked me on Facebook, I wrote to her today... Actually I was just going to see if she would respond..... Since she totally ignored me for some days before I stopped contacting her and going NC.

I said
"Hey there *name*"
And then 1h later I sent "there's something important, can we take a walk on Monday 16:00?"
Me trying to say something that she's too curious to ignore. But it was not smart enough hahah

4h later she said "what's important? I've moved on"
How do I go from here? I only said that to see if she would respond lol... Now I'm stuck.
Idk, I think I am overthinking it.. But why would she unblock in 1st place and then later respond , if she "moved on"?

I'm thinking about letting some time pass before responding, to make her more curious and hopefully maybe she says something more.. If not, I was thinking about covering up the lie with something like "that's not what I meant. It's something important that I can't take on text"

Help a lost bro out lol

"what's important? I've moved on"
Even if she's lying you should respect her and respect yourself, just take time away from her (being close to her or talking with her you will not be able to close the wounds.)
That's my opinion, I think you should focus on being happy, not being dependent, cause that's what you are right know.

 

[finality]

Reached out one last time. Tried making plans tonight and she said maybe tomorrow. Then I tried making plans for tomorrow and she said she might be going out of town and will let me know lol.

I dunno.. last week we were making plans to get a dog together and what we would do on here birthday and her interest level now is less than 50%.

Obviously another guy popped in the equation for her to go cold this fast. Probably she was flirting for weeks with him and then when we had a fight she monkey branched. I didn't talk to her for 3 days after the fight and then when I did everything was different.

I won't reach out again, lesson learned. I've already embarrassed myself enough but the mind plays tricks on you and you make up things that are simply not there.

I think part of the problem is my last gf before my current ex was a borderline. So a lot of break ups, manipulations and then back together like nothing happened.

My current ex also broke up 3 times only to get back together a few days later. I honestly thought this would happen again this time. Normally if I reached out she wanted to be with me and would say it. This time it's just radio silence and me chasing.

Maybe part of the issue is me? I always break up with women early in the relationship only to get back a few days later. It's kind of about control I guess.. or I need to drama of the highs and lows.

Unfortunately there wasn't enough emotional roller coasters in this relationship for her to have a huge attachment to the relationship. I didn't bang her the last 3 weeks I was with her because I was flatlining from nofap. I told her we needed to talk and told her that I don't like that she is so closed sexually... I mean she is a pleaser.. lots of head, loved giving rim jobs ect... but she had to **** with the lights out... wouldn't walk around naked, was very self conscious of her body.. when I broke up those issues in regards to things I don't like about her she just walked out and that was that.

i believe i touched on one of her insecurities and hit her at a profound level. I believed this likely caused her to lose trust in me as she now associates that breach of intimate protection with me.

Or maybe the other guy just fuks her a lot better.

As doc love says .. look at the actions. Literally zero indication that she wants to be with me st this point. I would like to get back together with her.. she was a good women and I cheated on her..she didn't know but I was sleeping with someone the past 2 months. I regret it very much. Her guy was probably going off like crazy durning these times as I likely had a change in my patterns and wasn't totally present with her when we spent time together.

I'm not going to lie, this women I feel like I love her, would like to have kids with ect. She did a lot of really nice things for me, the only thing I didn't love was the sex with her.. when you date a borderline it's hard to compete but I'm a man that wants a family one day and I will no doubt look at this one as the one that got away.

All I can do now is NC. It's what she wants and it's what I need to get over here. Her birthday is on Friday. I'll want to wish her a happy birthday but she would just send it to the trash bin anyways.

day 1

 

[Charmaine]

4h later she said "what's important? I've moved on"
How do I go from here? I only said that to see if she would respond lol... Now I'm stuck.
Idk, I think I am overthinking it.. But why would she unblock in 1st place and then later respond , if she "moved on"?

I'm thinking about letting some time pass before responding, to make her more curious and hopefully maybe she says something more.. If not, I was thinking about covering up the lie with something like "that's not what I meant. It's something important that I can't take on text"

Help a lost bro out lol

She said she had moved on, which means whatever you thought was important might not be important to her any more. She probably unblocked you because she had moved on therefore no longer had the need to have you blocked.

 

[Tecton]

Thanks for your advice. Appreciate it, even though I already know that..

But now that I already put myself in this situation, I want to do my best for last attempt.
What would you do in this situation?
Say if you absolutely HAD to get this girl back, say u would win $1B.

I know you'll say "I would move on" but let's skip that advice for a minute

 

[Charmaine]

But now that I already put myself in this situation, I want to do my best for last attempt.
What would you do in this situation?
Say if you absolutely HAD to get this girl back, say u would win $1B.

I know you'll say "I would move on" but let's skip that advice for a minute

If I were the girl and I had not moved on and still wanted to get back together, I would have accepted your invitation to take a walk, but instead, she told you she had moved on and tried to get you to tell her what was important in text so she didn't need to go out with you again.

If you still want to try one more time, perhaps you could reply to her something along the line of "Please come to <location> on Monday 16:00 and you will find out."

 

[Tecton]

text

Thanks mate

 

[Carpathian]

If you want to talk to her, call her and tell her that and have a time and location in mind. No more texts.

If you are overly anxious thinking about this, then you are not in a position to dominate her in the face to face.

Were I you, I would give it 60 days of NC, and I would block her during this time. What will happen when you block her is you will allow yourself to focus on you and improve yourself.


She said she feels lost. Only you can decide if she's worth suffering for, but it will cause you real pain if you hang on with this girl.

^^^This.
People always ignore this because somehow, they feel that their relationship is somehow different to mere ordinary relationships. It hardly ever works second time round. Anyone who thinks differently is fooling themselves.