Master Don Juan
- Dec 4, 2018
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Define ‘Throwing themselves ‘.I see this nonsense repeated so often on the internet, and I'm convinced nobody could possibly be basing it on actual life experience or observation. It's just an easily digestible mantra that gets mindlessly parroted enough that people start believing it.
The myth isn't that women all want a small subset of men, it's that this small subset of chosen men is chosen for being tall, rich, and ripped. These attributes can help, but they're all pretty far down the list of what attracts women. Based on my own observation, rather than on internet/pop culture tropes, I can list a bunch of characteristics that are better predictors of how easily a man gets laid:
- Comfortable, relaxed mannerisms
- Ability to ramble and avert awkward silence
- Tendency to make wisecracks and sexual innuendos, rather than serious logical statements
- Popularity/leader of social group
- Attractive face
- Good style (hair, clothes, etc.)
The strain of thought behind this myth takes on other forms, too:
"Bro, just lift weights, focus on your career, and the women will come!" Men absolutely should lift weights and put effort into building a solid career, but if you're struggling with women, becoming a Greek statue who earns $200k/yr still won't remotely turn you into a chick magnet.
"Women's standards aren't that high, I see hot women walking around with regular dudes all the time!" In these cases, regular just means the guy isn't a jacked Adonins, but make no mistake, the guy is not average. He probably embodies most if not all of the traits listed above. These examples don't prove that women aren't brutally selective; they are, but mostly on traits that don't jump out instantly.
And on the other side of this coin, the whole stereotype of guys who can't get laid as fat, unemployed, basement-dwelling, Cheeto dust-coated losers is BS. Guys who struggle to get laid are far more likely to be socially anxious, hyperlogical introverts with bad to mediocre facial genetics.