"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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The most embarrasing night ever.. A terrible field report from a terrible night

cola

Master Don Juan
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Straight to the point
I took this girl out to the club against my better judgement because i know there is so many things that can go wrong with taking a girl to the club, but anyways...
We go to one club it sucks..
Then we decide to go to the bar and get some drinks to loosen up before we go to the next club..
So I have way to much to drink, as I dont drink very frequently. She is a frequent drinker, and while im totally drunk she seems to be holding her liquor well..
While in the club I come to the startling revelation.. I lost my frikkin wallet.
about 100$, my ID, credit cards and thank god I didnt have my social security card in my wallet.

So she is ready to go, I dont know how to tell her that I dont know how the **** we're getting home...
But I break the news to her that we have to catch the stupid ass bus, and I feel like a big ass lame..
Im totally ****ing drunk, and she is not from baltimore so she doesnt know where she is going, so I make us walk literally 2 miles as I take wrong direction time and time again as a result of being drunk.

Finally we get to the bus stop and its 4:15 AM..
At this point after my constant attempts of annoying appologizing and saying how sorry I am, she basically says just stop ****ing talking..
The worst part:
She is a friends cousin, and knows everyone I know, and now everyones going to think I a lame.. And not going to take to kindly around me anymore..
Oh well, guess its time to move ..

So.. Rule 1.
1. Dont take a female out to the club-
Situation could've be avoided if I just followed that rule

2. Don't drink... I am never drinking again, nothing good ever happens when im drunk. And theres no reason, who wants a fake confidence that comes from liquor anyways..

3. Dont take a ****ing wallet to the club.. Just I.D and Cash.. I dont know if I was pick pocketed on the dancefloor or who the fvck knows..

4. Never take out a girl in your friend sect.. I.E a friends relative
you never know when some ****ed up **** is going to happen and everyone will look at you different.. Now im pretty sure im friendless and my confidence is pretty damaged.. Going to take a while to get it back but I will.

-Cola
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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macallik

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lol at all these ultimatums from one bad night. Laugh it off and back to business as usual
 

Ronnie Poleman

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Dude, you're being a bit too hard on yourself. Sounds like you were really unlucky, in the right situation taking a girl to a club could be a blessing in disguise (perfect excuse to dance with her and grind her lol).

Not drinking :p ?? Don't get stupidly drunk, sure, but no drinking at all = the other extreme.
 

Prodigy746

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lol you might think its a big deal now but it really isnt. I read somewhere that if you think that you meesed up just ask your self "5 years later is it gonna matter what i did today?" if the answer is no than you didnt mess up too much.

5 years from now you will think about this and laugh at yourself...
 

Julian

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First off theres only 1 mistake in this entire situation, well 2.

1. dont bring sand to the beach
2. dont bring broke ass sand to the beach - what? this cheap ass b1tch couldnt pay for a cab for yall? damn son..

You lost your wallet, thats only really negative thing that kicked off all the BS...losing your wallet blows in any situation.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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