The **** Monologues (aka the penis monologues)

[Chosen1]

I think some our **** stories would be interesting and by **** stories I mean the stories that girls don't know

Mine would start of like this

I wake up with a giant boner and pee. My master is smart but dumb he has hopes of banging the chick at the learning center. He goes home and shower wait what are you doing..... Put down the razor ah ahhhhhh no it burns. I spend days recovering from his mutalation of me. Oh quit talking to her she doesn't like you or maybe she does I'm blind and deaf and pissed you tried to shave me. No matter what gunwitch says about girls giving you blow jobs, she isn't going to give you one if she doesn't see me. Besides you masterbated me so much I probably wouldn't like it if she touched me anyway..... To be continued what do you guys think We can start a world tour of guys manliness. WHO'S WITH ME

 

[Teflon_Mcgee]

I am king. I am the ruler. It is at my will that pleasure shall be felt. Smite me and you shall be smitted. Be weak and my bidding will be done. I am your greatest friend. Except for when I am your greatest enemy.

 

[THE_ADDMAN]

Praise me, the one with the purple helmet. All women shall kneel down and worship me. And they shall return to their kinsfolk and sing tales of my many victories. and their girlfriends shall come to worship me, as I don my latex armour and prepare for battle, riding to glory for years to c*m

 

[ValleyDJing]

Wtf?!!

 

[Create Reality]

Touch me Please me Ooooh just Squeeze me!