"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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The love of her life but only 60% IL?

insidious

Master Don Juan
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So an ex is around, I still chat her up.

I know, Stupid Me, I know, don't preach me on the obvious, however, something she told me bears repeating and I'm wondering if you guys have the same take I do...

She's been seeing some guy the past 3 months. She "loves" him more than anyone she's known before. She frequently wonders why she has fallen this hard for him, she wonders if he is capable of "spells"...whatever, I think that is BS. Bottom line is, she is smitten badly.

Thing is, the dude lives hundreds of miles away and they don't get to see each other that much. Bear in mind, this girl is 30 years old, she is vibrant and healthy. She has alluded to her increased horniness and need for physical intimacy.

One day she told me this guy is not the best lover she has had, that there have been others guys who were better (myself included, though she never told me this, but I know ;) )

Maybe this is superficial of me, but how does a 30-year-old woman fall in love with a man who is obviously not bringing her memorable moments in the bedroom and who hasn't left her with an indelible impression of his uniqueness in her mind?

I would guess her interest level is 60-70% but she goes out of her way to talk to this guy and spend as much time as they can even if they aren't necessarily spending their rare moments alone knocking boots.

Do you guys this is normal behavior for a young woman?
 

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OneArmDeeJay

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First off why are you being her emotional tampon?

She has no interest in you and isn’t going to bang you so move on.

Who cares if she’s not doin the guy 24/7 or is the best she’s ever have. Doesn’t make you better then him, obviously. It isn’t all about whose number one in bed.

He’s probably being a DJ instead of an AFC like you waiting like a little lost puppy dog under the table waiting for master to throw a bone or some scraps.

Get over her and move on.

Stop trying to judge how much interest level she has in the dude.

Its quite obvious that her interest level is quite high for the dude and about ZERO for you other then you being her emotional tampon.
 

Big Eee Zee

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take it easy onearmdeejay, he has a point.

first of all, you are being an afc about your ex, don't talk to her about this new guy. infact, i don't think your ready to just be friends with her, move on for now. re-establish contact later when you're truly over her.
But you raise an interesting point. she does seem overly interested in this new guy for the given situation. maybe he is an amazing conversationalist. I think that she has some subconscious criteria because of her upbringing or a past event, and somehow that guy meets it. Maybe she loves guys with brown hair and blue eyes, maybe she loves guys that have a dalmation, maybe she loves guys that are pilots, you never know. suffice to say, i think that this guy is doing something that this particular girl finds amazing, but might not necessarily work on others. In other words, he lucked out. A lot of love and seduction is luck and chance.

Let it go, its not worth thinking about.
 

TxCowboy

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Originally posted by insidious

She has alluded to her increased horniness and need for physical intimacy.
HAHAHA :crackup:

Thats Dr. Phil material right there people !
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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