"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
The Horrible Lies of SoSuave.com
- Thread starter Nooby Doo
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
Looks like there has been a push in the last few weeks to encourage DJ's to abandon SoSuave and go elsewhere where the focus is solely on seduction of hors and sex reports... and where others are telling them about 'special' techniques and called themselves pick-up artists.
Maybe some people come here to seek help beyond getting their fingers wet in a hors crotch. Is there something evil or inherently wrong with that? You guys make it sound obscene for a person to improve oneself in other dimensions of their lives beside the penis dimension. The problem is not with the newbies on SoSuave, the problem is with those who see themselves as better and thus superior to others, and in their selfishness go elsewhere to seek fulfillment, instead of helping those who are in the most need of their knowledge here.
I'm going to give you the secret here, so that you don't have to waste your time going elsewhere (other seduction sites) to find the Holy Grail! Here it is...
"Hors are not to be chased, they are only to be found!"
It is not your tricks, gimmicks, techniques, or maneuverings and smooth talk that gets a hor! You already have her by her desire for you, and of course for purposes of gratifying her own selfish sexual lustful desires. Her mind is already made up, as long as you don't upset her by acting like you already have her, then out of spite she will not give herself to you. There is no manipulative seduction involved on either side, you both want the same thing and are fulfilling each other's lust! You don't have to put a lot of work into getting a hor, natural forces are at work here. This is a hor's thinking!
You guys who think you accomplished something of worth and value, because a hor voluntarily opened her legs for you to derive satiisfaction from your gyrating and epileptic motions, are only fooling yourselves. She needs you more than you need her!!
Now if you want to pursue a woman that is worthy, then I will tell you that not only do you have to find her but you must approach and seduce her differently depending on her mindset, values and specific circumstances. Your best chances to conquer such women is already programmed in your nature and you need to let this masculine nature dictate your course of action. To succeed in your pursuits, you must be in sync with your nature as a man and have the mindset that comes with it!
Man and Woman, and the union thereof, is not an art form nor is it a scientific matter, it is a naturally occurring phenomenon. If you can increase your chances of making this union more successful by seeking the advice of others, then why not seek it. You can’t go wrong for listening!
SoSuave is a forum that provides you with the tools and knowledge to pursue the hor and non-hor alike. This site gives you a balanced perspective. It is up to the individual Don Juan to decide which philosophy suits him best and what action to take, if any. This is 'his' prerogative and no one else's!
If you found a place that suits your interests better, then by all means you are under no obligation to glorify us with your presence on SoSuave, nor are you compelled to enlighten us Don Juans with your insight and wisdom any longer!
Go in peace.
Maybe some people come here to seek help beyond getting their fingers wet in a hors crotch. Is there something evil or inherently wrong with that? You guys make it sound obscene for a person to improve oneself in other dimensions of their lives beside the penis dimension. The problem is not with the newbies on SoSuave, the problem is with those who see themselves as better and thus superior to others, and in their selfishness go elsewhere to seek fulfillment, instead of helping those who are in the most need of their knowledge here.
I'm going to give you the secret here, so that you don't have to waste your time going elsewhere (other seduction sites) to find the Holy Grail! Here it is...
"Hors are not to be chased, they are only to be found!"
It is not your tricks, gimmicks, techniques, or maneuverings and smooth talk that gets a hor! You already have her by her desire for you, and of course for purposes of gratifying her own selfish sexual lustful desires. Her mind is already made up, as long as you don't upset her by acting like you already have her, then out of spite she will not give herself to you. There is no manipulative seduction involved on either side, you both want the same thing and are fulfilling each other's lust! You don't have to put a lot of work into getting a hor, natural forces are at work here. This is a hor's thinking!
You guys who think you accomplished something of worth and value, because a hor voluntarily opened her legs for you to derive satiisfaction from your gyrating and epileptic motions, are only fooling yourselves. She needs you more than you need her!!
Now if you want to pursue a woman that is worthy, then I will tell you that not only do you have to find her but you must approach and seduce her differently depending on her mindset, values and specific circumstances. Your best chances to conquer such women is already programmed in your nature and you need to let this masculine nature dictate your course of action. To succeed in your pursuits, you must be in sync with your nature as a man and have the mindset that comes with it!
Man and Woman, and the union thereof, is not an art form nor is it a scientific matter, it is a naturally occurring phenomenon. If you can increase your chances of making this union more successful by seeking the advice of others, then why not seek it. You can’t go wrong for listening!
SoSuave is a forum that provides you with the tools and knowledge to pursue the hor and non-hor alike. This site gives you a balanced perspective. It is up to the individual Don Juan to decide which philosophy suits him best and what action to take, if any. This is 'his' prerogative and no one else's!
If you found a place that suits your interests better, then by all means you are under no obligation to glorify us with your presence on SoSuave, nor are you compelled to enlighten us Don Juans with your insight and wisdom any longer!
Go in peace.
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elvis aint dead yet
Senior Don Juan
Very well put PRL.
There are too many guys, young and old and online and not online, whose total basis of life is to get laid. They base their self-worth on how many chics they've hooked up with or for some, if they hooked up with any chics.
As I've always said, if your life revolves around chics and getting laid, you will never learn anything about anything.
And the responses of "GO READ THE BIBLE" is utter useless. If somebody is going to answer a question great, if not, why waste somebody elses time with a useless response saying "GO READ THE BIBLE."
There are too many guys, young and old and online and not online, whose total basis of life is to get laid. They base their self-worth on how many chics they've hooked up with or for some, if they hooked up with any chics.
As I've always said, if your life revolves around chics and getting laid, you will never learn anything about anything.
And the responses of "GO READ THE BIBLE" is utter useless. If somebody is going to answer a question great, if not, why waste somebody elses time with a useless response saying "GO READ THE BIBLE."
ShortTimer
Banned
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2002
- Messages
- 917
- Reaction score
- 1
Oh look, ShortTimer baiting.
I’m sorry if you think my criticism of your methodology is “off topic.” Let's be clear about my position here: I believe your method of thinking of women is fundamentally flawed. I'm not just saying I believe your theories of women are flawed, I'm saying the way you think about them is flawed. When your premises is flawed then the rest of the structure collapses on itself and none of your results can be trusted. There's no reason to accept the conclution "be a man" when 1.) you have never been able to clearly state what that means and 2.) the method you used to get there was flawed.
You may be a good writer but you certainly cannot take criticism. Nor do you even understand its purpose. Please, get over yourself with the "I don't comment on things I think are wrong" line. It's called "peer-review" I'm sorry you can't take it. Anytime any criticism comes up all you talk about is the psychology of the person criticizing and completely miss that the person may actually have a point. Criticism, or "peer-review" gives us all the reality check we need, it also helps others to understand our positions better.
Way to dodge the issue there. Don Ronny is right about what you did: you said it's a horrible thing to be a commentator and tear down others and then you do it yourself. How do you spell hypocrisy?
Let me sum up Pook's post and basically most of all his posts: I'm right and you're not.
No you're certainly not. You come here to preach and move on. Whenever a real discussion does start you shout about how the posters are "commentators" and how "their psychology is all wrong." I have NEVER seen you stay the course on a thread to support your ideas; instead you make a comment about how the other person is psychologically flawed and never post again.
Actually they are at The Thinking Man's Minefield, Intellectual *****s, or a Camille Paglia book; just like every other post you’ve ever had.
Here is the clue that you need: if you want to be taken seriously as a thinker (and you DO, else you wouldn't be posting here and you'd just keep it all to yourself) you need to grow up. After that you need to get an education. If you want to preach about nature and all that bull**** then you need to learn philosophy and critical thinking.
Pook says: “Now I’m uneducated!”
You certainly are.
"I am Pook and I am above college education! I am above philosophy!"
Like I said: grow up.
“I am Pook I reflect nature!”
More bull****: all you can do is interpret nature, absolute truth is not possible; but if you actually studied epistemology you’d already know that.
“Be a MAN ShortTimer!”
In another post you already established that you can’t give a clear definition for what a “man” is… so, you know… whatever
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Nooby Doo
Don Juan
Short Timer.
Your name suits ya kiddo. You got a short fuse and low tolerance for bullsh!t.
Glad I am not the only one who questions these flawed ideas.
Fingz,
You are right. But my diplomacy goes out the window when I smell bullsh*t. I calls it like I sees it! Horrible Lies!!!
Your name suits ya kiddo. You got a short fuse and low tolerance for bullsh!t.
Glad I am not the only one who questions these flawed ideas.
Fingz,
You are right. But my diplomacy goes out the window when I smell bullsh*t. I calls it like I sees it! Horrible Lies!!!
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
-Zero_h0uR-
Senior Don Juan
Everyone is missing the bottom line.
The techniques aren't meant to be followed word for word for the rest of your life. They are simply guidelines. Not everything put forth on this board is going to be correct for every person, either. It depends on your own attitude, as well as your understanding that once you use the "sosuave guidelines," you have to develop them into your own personal style.
-- Zero
The techniques aren't meant to be followed word for word for the rest of your life. They are simply guidelines. Not everything put forth on this board is going to be correct for every person, either. It depends on your own attitude, as well as your understanding that once you use the "sosuave guidelines," you have to develop them into your own personal style.
-- Zero
WestCoaster
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 8, 2003
- Messages
- 2,028
- Reaction score
- 31
Either I have a reading comprehension problem or ...
... Nooby Do does. (This is in response to the intial post of this thread.)
I've read parts of the DJ Bible and more importantly read the articles and Hall of Fame posts and boy has he misinterpreted the entire essence of DJism ... like many have here.
Of course it's about building confidence and self-improvement. It's totally about that, and learning how to meet women while not putting them at the center of the universe.
The techniques and tactics are like learning the cross-over dribble or spin-move in basketball, they supplement your game but certainly not the foundation of it.
Like most, Nooby Do has totally misinterpreted the DJ Bible and the articles.
DJism has greatly helped me in that I learned that my own life is more important than any woman I've dated; that a rejection is not the end of the world; and that the sun doesn't rise or set on one girl's a$$. The quicker we all figure out that your own life is important, that oneitis is a sick disease, that AFCism is created by society and hollywood, and that taking ownership of your life whether you're single, married, dating someone or playing the field is the most important.
Why do so many lose sight of those basic fundamentals of DJism and focus on techniques, sayings, and tricks?
... Nooby Do does. (This is in response to the intial post of this thread.)
I've read parts of the DJ Bible and more importantly read the articles and Hall of Fame posts and boy has he misinterpreted the entire essence of DJism ... like many have here.
Of course it's about building confidence and self-improvement. It's totally about that, and learning how to meet women while not putting them at the center of the universe.
The techniques and tactics are like learning the cross-over dribble or spin-move in basketball, they supplement your game but certainly not the foundation of it.
Like most, Nooby Do has totally misinterpreted the DJ Bible and the articles.
DJism has greatly helped me in that I learned that my own life is more important than any woman I've dated; that a rejection is not the end of the world; and that the sun doesn't rise or set on one girl's a$$. The quicker we all figure out that your own life is important, that oneitis is a sick disease, that AFCism is created by society and hollywood, and that taking ownership of your life whether you're single, married, dating someone or playing the field is the most important.
Why do so many lose sight of those basic fundamentals of DJism and focus on techniques, sayings, and tricks?
DJmonster
Don Juan
I don't understand the point of this thread. It did not inspire me at all, it didn't give me any tips on dealing with women, no helpful realizations. (some of the principles in the Bible are lies? That's Bullsh**!)
As a recent newcomer to this site, who took the time to read (and understand) the Bible. I can say that all the material has been beneficial for me. I changed my state of mind about myself and women, and as a result, I'm in a quality LTR. Without the knowledge I gained from the Bible and the replies to my posted questions, I surely would still be a miserable AFC. This site is great. The stuff works. Nitpicking at some of the principles is pointless, and it only gives newbies an excuse for AFC behavior. Also, telling people that they need to just stop reading, get out there and act!?? -This advice is about as helpful as telling a fat person to stop eating so much! Preparation always helps. The right state of mind will help. Knowledge about the behavioral patterns of women will help!
Personally, I'm going to go re-read parts of the Bible, and whenever I've got a question, I'm coming back to this board, because learning here makes it so much better out there : )
As a recent newcomer to this site, who took the time to read (and understand) the Bible. I can say that all the material has been beneficial for me. I changed my state of mind about myself and women, and as a result, I'm in a quality LTR. Without the knowledge I gained from the Bible and the replies to my posted questions, I surely would still be a miserable AFC. This site is great. The stuff works. Nitpicking at some of the principles is pointless, and it only gives newbies an excuse for AFC behavior. Also, telling people that they need to just stop reading, get out there and act!?? -This advice is about as helpful as telling a fat person to stop eating so much! Preparation always helps. The right state of mind will help. Knowledge about the behavioral patterns of women will help!
Personally, I'm going to go re-read parts of the Bible, and whenever I've got a question, I'm coming back to this board, because learning here makes it so much better out there : )
WestCoaster
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 8, 2003
- Messages
- 2,028
- Reaction score
- 31
Every few weeks a post like this pops up
There's always a DJ basher out there and I'm not sure why. If you don't like it, don't read the site. There's always some guy full of hate and anger who doesn't get it. Their theory: "Just go out and ask women." Yeah, and Nancy Reagan's "Just Say No" against drugs really worked didn't it? The drug rate actually went up after that.
The world is AFC. We're taught to sing songs to women, saturate them with flowers, guys on TV (Everybody Sucks Raymond, etc.) are AFCs, songs on the radio, stupid books by John Gray, etc., all give us the AFC view. Heck, these people don't even know what DJism is. This is a unique theory and lifestyle.
For those smoothies who pull in the women without sosuave or DJism, more power to you. All I know is this has worked for me and all of my friends who have adopted DJism. Most of American male society has been taught wrong from day one and because of this, we like this site.
Of course in about two weeks we'll get another "this site sucks" thread.
DJ theory works if you let it.
There's always a DJ basher out there and I'm not sure why. If you don't like it, don't read the site. There's always some guy full of hate and anger who doesn't get it. Their theory: "Just go out and ask women." Yeah, and Nancy Reagan's "Just Say No" against drugs really worked didn't it? The drug rate actually went up after that.
The world is AFC. We're taught to sing songs to women, saturate them with flowers, guys on TV (Everybody Sucks Raymond, etc.) are AFCs, songs on the radio, stupid books by John Gray, etc., all give us the AFC view. Heck, these people don't even know what DJism is. This is a unique theory and lifestyle.
For those smoothies who pull in the women without sosuave or DJism, more power to you. All I know is this has worked for me and all of my friends who have adopted DJism. Most of American male society has been taught wrong from day one and because of this, we like this site.
Of course in about two weeks we'll get another "this site sucks" thread.
DJ theory works if you let it.
Julius_Caesar
Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2003
- Messages
- 134
- Reaction score
- 0
- Age
- 40
This site can work. So what does it matter? I have seen great results, I have become more of a man. What is more important than that? Anybody can see results. I did not see results immediately, and I still have to work. It is how you go about using this site that determines your success. If you read and NEVER USE anything or try anything guess what YOU FAIL.
The DJ bible is quite like its holy counterpart. You have the die hards who interpret it all literally(aka people who have no style or imagination) and the people who see that it is merely a group of guidlines. If you can't figure out how to live with something as helpful and potent as the DJ bible, then you are not worth talking to.
So, again, I don't understand what is wrong because it works for me. I don't know what doesn't work for you. That is your problem. This post is "you are wrong because it doesn't work for me" and the other guy says "you must be wrong because it works for me." Can you see why this post is going in circles? The people who are with nooby are the people for which the "lies" he speaks of do not work, and the people against him are the people for who it works. I am not saying that I think everything nooby says is wrong or that all those "lies" worked for me, but some of the stuff he said was common sense. I believe that what pook does works for him, and so he told us. I believe that what Fingers does works for him and so he told us. The key phrase is "for him." There should be a disclaimer that all the things posted are based on a certain set of experiences (that of the writer) and that results cannot be attained unless the experieces are similar. This is where being a whole, independant person comes in: you have to try to figure out what works for you. You can use other guys experiences as GUILDLINES but you have to independantly figure out your life.
There is a life outside of bible. You can figure out life and change for the better if you focus on doing it NOW. Always live the moment. Always quiet you mind. Nothing exsists but exsisting.
peace, and I hope you figure out what works for you.
The DJ bible is quite like its holy counterpart. You have the die hards who interpret it all literally(aka people who have no style or imagination) and the people who see that it is merely a group of guidlines. If you can't figure out how to live with something as helpful and potent as the DJ bible, then you are not worth talking to.
So, again, I don't understand what is wrong because it works for me. I don't know what doesn't work for you. That is your problem. This post is "you are wrong because it doesn't work for me" and the other guy says "you must be wrong because it works for me." Can you see why this post is going in circles? The people who are with nooby are the people for which the "lies" he speaks of do not work, and the people against him are the people for who it works. I am not saying that I think everything nooby says is wrong or that all those "lies" worked for me, but some of the stuff he said was common sense. I believe that what pook does works for him, and so he told us. I believe that what Fingers does works for him and so he told us. The key phrase is "for him." There should be a disclaimer that all the things posted are based on a certain set of experiences (that of the writer) and that results cannot be attained unless the experieces are similar. This is where being a whole, independant person comes in: you have to try to figure out what works for you. You can use other guys experiences as GUILDLINES but you have to independantly figure out your life.
There is a life outside of bible. You can figure out life and change for the better if you focus on doing it NOW. Always live the moment. Always quiet you mind. Nothing exsists but exsisting.
peace, and I hope you figure out what works for you.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
George Gordon
Banned
Hi ShortTimer.
I've noticed in many threads, people try or feel a need to attach concrete definitions to words. You actually get people posting a dozen dictionary definitions to clarify a 12-word sentence. Such complication. Why some people transform language into mathematics is beyond me. All this division.
Words are light cues summoning images; yet there are no two men with an identical vision. So don’t you think that when two people communicate verbally (or with the use of words) the meaning blurs from world to world? Imagine the dissonance between a ‘normal’ sighted person having a discussion on a painting with a color-blind person. Consider the implications for a moment.
…
Now, could it be possible that experience is the most effective form of transferring ideas? And if so, wouldn’t metaphors be one of the most powerful ways of doing this, because all the subjective details become insignificant? Its core permeates.
But carrying more force: The best posts I’ve read on this forum are always a roadmap to an experience; the ‘path’ uncovers the answer for you. Maybe the answers you seek are in embedded in the experiences you have yet to undertake, instead of in some phantasm-like ‘universal equation’.
I mean, would you ever consider banishing that damned ‘equal-sign’ and embracing THE PROCESS rather than the black and white ‘sum’?
For instance, what mathematician can comprehend infinity? If you’re like me, when you spend a few minutes trying to get a hold of it, the further you progress, the farther you seem to be from the end, the answer. Hurts the brain, in fact. Why bother trying to confine eternity?
See. For Man, everything has an END. Eventually he deflates and falls no matter how long he can endure. He must be humbled by his mortality. And, Man is ‘outside’; he is physical. Think about what happens when you have sex, then picture that process as a man's lifetime, and you’ll begin to understand what a man is.
“What is a Man?” The answer can be revealed through MANIFESTATION; The Festival of Man.
“But how do I do this?” Make your imagination reality. Forget ‘truth’. Sculpt your beliefs with the hands that have felt Nature’s Laws, the fingers that have followed the contours of your very face.
!GEORGE GORDON!
DjDreamer
Master Don Juan
Nooby Doo, who the fvck do you think you are? Are you the devine holder of truth? You just toke popular ideas and passionately expressed the opposite. Oh how clever...you're not an innovator of ideas you're just playing virtual ping pong with old ideas....
Sosuave.com was not intended to discuss rocket science...many see info on this site as a source of motivation. Certain posts help some people when those posts are useless to others so you criticising posts doesn't mean much.
Sosuave.com was not intended to discuss rocket science...many see info on this site as a source of motivation. Certain posts help some people when those posts are useless to others so you criticising posts doesn't mean much.
You can live your life for just puzzy but that would be a wasted life...you neglected your artistic, philosophic and other abilities.
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Dee-Zy
Master Don Juan
I enter here to defend sosuave.com but after reading what you wrote ... granted that I only read half ... I have to agree to a certain extend. But really, I think you are too bitter or you don't fully get sosuave.com
I'll be back latter with my refutations.
I'll be back latter with my refutations.
damn...
I've put A LOT of efforts trying to explain, why all this site is a BIG fake. Is it so hard to understand, that THE ONLY thing, which got you success, was YOU doing SOMETHING. JUST something. And if you have had a success, it was BECAUSE a girl liked you from the start. the main think was - you showed interest. That's just ONE good thing here- getting guys to take some action. Other is Ego bullsh|t, like "Women don't know what they want", "How you think, you shall become", "Neg-hits", "Challenge" (that's one of dumbest things. It says, that if you possess a Challenge, the interest will Rise. Just they don't realize one thing, that that isn't a rised interest, that's girls Ego, which tells her, that she might loose you, and then she takes desperate action to stop that. and you believe that's rised interest? LOL ), "Fake it till you make it" (ex: Confidence. again - LOL. guys writing here don't even know a sh|t about REAL confidence. and their house of cards WILL crash, when they encounter some unexpected event/situation and their insecurities will POP out in their all "beauty". thats just a time question.).. and a lot of other "Rules-Illusions", self restrictions (not to say that or that, not to buy that or that, not to do that or that...) which sooner or later will turn back to you. I've been there, I've done that...
Now I behave COMLETELY AFC with girls (bring flowers on the first date (!), pay for dinner, say them compliments, do a lot of surprises, EVEN write poems) and they are all after me, like crazy. You'll ask "How that can be?", I can answer you - They JUST are intersted, and I keep some common sense (aka - have some self-esteem and be conscious of what REALLY happening around). Neediness isn't some quality, which depends to thought termin "AFC", that's just your insecurities, complexes, which you should overcome. until then, NO tactic, or trick, or theorizing will get you success (maybe short-time success), and sooner or later you'll CRASH, and you'll crash HARD on your ass. That's where all this Ego BS will lead you to. Believe it or not. you'll experience that for yourself.
I've put A LOT of efforts trying to explain, why all this site is a BIG fake. Is it so hard to understand, that THE ONLY thing, which got you success, was YOU doing SOMETHING. JUST something. And if you have had a success, it was BECAUSE a girl liked you from the start. the main think was - you showed interest. That's just ONE good thing here- getting guys to take some action. Other is Ego bullsh|t, like "Women don't know what they want", "How you think, you shall become", "Neg-hits", "Challenge" (that's one of dumbest things. It says, that if you possess a Challenge, the interest will Rise. Just they don't realize one thing, that that isn't a rised interest, that's girls Ego, which tells her, that she might loose you, and then she takes desperate action to stop that. and you believe that's rised interest? LOL
), "Fake it till you make it" (ex: Confidence. again - LOL. guys writing here don't even know a sh|t about REAL confidence. and their house of cards WILL crash, when they encounter some unexpected event/situation and their insecurities will POP out in their all "beauty". thats just a time question.).. and a lot of other "Rules-Illusions", self restrictions (not to say that or that, not to buy that or that, not to do that or that...) which sooner or later will turn back to you. I've been there, I've done that...Now I behave COMLETELY AFC with girls (bring flowers on the first date (!), pay for dinner, say them compliments, do a lot of surprises, EVEN write poems) and they are all after me, like crazy. You'll ask "How that can be?", I can answer you - They JUST are intersted, and I keep some common sense (aka - have some self-esteem and be conscious of what REALLY happening around). Neediness isn't some quality, which depends to thought termin "AFC", that's just your insecurities, complexes, which you should overcome. until then, NO tactic, or trick, or theorizing will get you success (maybe short-time success), and sooner or later you'll CRASH, and you'll crash HARD on your ass. That's where all this Ego BS will lead you to. Believe it or not. you'll experience that for yourself.
darwinian_sympathiser
Don Juan
I couldn't have put it better myself . . . . . .
Also read Deep Dish's "Women are simple" thread. That's one of the few threads here that qualify as a devastating tour de force.
I respsect Pook in certain areas, but I too agree that he has preached and gone overboard too much.
Life is simple. Women are simple. That's really the end of it.
And I would also like to mention that Craig Reeves and MysteryWoman debate about looks. I think we all know that, deep down, looks matter to us all - it's just that some of us are playing a political game of hiding ourselves and denying our own faults and feelings. I would like to end with a beautiful retort that xblitz44x gave in response to Craig Reeves in the thread "I Only like Hot Women":
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
I think PR lover has the right idea about some women, but I think most of his views stem from a jaded mind set.
Somewhere in his life, some beatch must have really taken him for a ride. Not all women are hors, not even most of them. Quit worrying about the morals of corrupt women and focus on improving yourself.
You don't bug me as much as some people on this board, but this constant whining about hors gets old.
Somewhere in his life, some beatch must have really taken him for a ride. Not all women are hors, not even most of them. Quit worrying about the morals of corrupt women and focus on improving yourself.
You don't bug me as much as some people on this board, but this constant whining about hors gets old.
WestCoaster
Master Don Juan
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- May 8, 2003
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It's all about self-improvement
The tricks and techniques supplement your game, aren't your game.
What I've learned most from this site is whether a woman says yes or no to your advances, your life should still be excellent. As noted on the "tips" board the movie "Office Space" where the guy asks out Jennifer Aniston, telling her he's going next door for lunch and if she'd like to come along great, if not that's fine, too, either way he's going to enjoy a good meal.
To me that is the essence of DJism, not neg hits, not waiting X days to call, not always "nexting" but playing it cool. There's a reason this site is called sosuave not souptight or soobsessed.
Being calm, cool, confident, and collected whether you're dating, serious, married, single, divorced, never married, is the key to everything here. If you have those above qualities you'll attract the RIGHT woman, not just any woman. And if you don't attract the right woman, so be it, your life is excellent anyway.
This is a great site, high quality, but I must say despite that I'm a frequent message board poster and reader, the articles and DJ Bible are far superior to the board.
The tricks and techniques supplement your game, aren't your game.
What I've learned most from this site is whether a woman says yes or no to your advances, your life should still be excellent. As noted on the "tips" board the movie "Office Space" where the guy asks out Jennifer Aniston, telling her he's going next door for lunch and if she'd like to come along great, if not that's fine, too, either way he's going to enjoy a good meal.
To me that is the essence of DJism, not neg hits, not waiting X days to call, not always "nexting" but playing it cool. There's a reason this site is called sosuave not souptight or soobsessed.
Being calm, cool, confident, and collected whether you're dating, serious, married, single, divorced, never married, is the key to everything here. If you have those above qualities you'll attract the RIGHT woman, not just any woman. And if you don't attract the right woman, so be it, your life is excellent anyway.
This is a great site, high quality, but I must say despite that I'm a frequent message board poster and reader, the articles and DJ Bible are far superior to the board.
ShortTimer
Banned
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2002
- Messages
- 917
- Reaction score
- 1
Not all words have the same level of concrete-ness. I would say the word "glass" is more concrete than "ethics," however without any concrete-ness communication becomes impossible.
Some people desire clarity in their communications. Others realize that anything but the most mundane interactions with the world requires clarity. Try organizing a large event and being vague about time or place and see how well things go.
No I wouldn't because of the imprecise nature of experience. Let's say three men are standing in a field at night. Suddenly flames streak across the sky.
The first man says: "This is certainly a sign from the gods!"
The second man says: "No! It is a sign from alien visitors!"
The third says: "You are both wrong, it was a meteor!"
Three men with the same experience, but radically different interpretations. Unfortunately experience cannot tell us who is right.
If the choice is to "think" or to "feel" I will always choose "think." Unless of course I "think" that "feeling" will further my goals more quickly than "thinking" would.
However, my real life experience (ha ha!) has shown me that the times I allowed feelings to make my decisions for me I have only ended up worse than I started. (I think the previous sentence is exactly why "experience" is not a good way to communicate ideas -- see how differently I view life from what is no doubt "common" experiences.)
Again, why experience does transfer ideas well. I have faced my own mortality in a hospital bed, but this has not humbled me. It has hardened my resolve to deny the oblivion at the end, and to not be afraid of it. If anything it strengthened my resolve and self-confidence. Reality does not scare me.
If you need to leave the world you live in.
May you lie down and stay a while.
Though you may not remember dreaming.
Something waits for you to breathe again.
My beliefs are sculpted by how my mind has interpreted my world experiences. Obviously I have come to radically different conclusions than you. It is simply too bad that you don't seem to understand that even if I had the same experiences as you doesn’t mean I'd come to the same conclusions about those experiences.
George Gordon
Banned
ShortTimer
Shared experience is empathy, (sympathy, and sometimes apathy); but never inside of right and wrong.
I mean, don't you get two different perspectives from a newscast when the host interviews a spectator as a opposed to a player in the event? Which one would you sooner trust for advice on how to go about taking part in the event itself? Or the spectator says the play was all wrong; whereas, the player replies, "It just didn't work there..."
Is it possible that you put EXPERIENCE (and SKILL) in the same realm as KNOWLEDGE?
What is experience but a person relating (or communicating) to something outside of his own power? Like a man in his canoe battling rapids, immersing himself in an outside force, and learning to resond and adapt to it. Increasing skill. Or like a man learning how to respond to women, and his own nature.
This is what I was driving at when I said that the best posts here have always been posts that aim at experience because the ideas are permeated through that 'application'. In keeping with this site: when someone is discussing the different kinds of expressions a woman will give you when you interact with her; how are you going to understand those ideas unless you have already experienced numerous rejections, consequently learning at a *feeling*, instinctual, GUT-LEVEL where things are at?
When you're thinking, you're analyzing; when you're feeling, you're relying on those 'banked' experiences that you've collected and the control of your nature, which allow you to interact reflexively, aren't you?
You know, because I'm Mr. SkinnyGeorge, how do I know what these guys in the Fitness Forum are talking about when they discuss their urges and different kinds of energies they're experiencing? I can gather a lot of knowledge, imagine, and define what's happening, but after working at, and actually developing big, huge, massive muscles...being in the same shoes, there'll be no need for questions, things will click.
!GEORGE GORDON!
But isn't this kind of 'experience' like watching two people communicate on a silver screen? For isn't this the observer's point of view where the person isn't really PART of the experience, but a bystander? Could you actually be talking about 'knowledge' (or beliefs), NOT experience? And aren't these men just communicating with themselves and merely expressing their opinions to one another?
Shared experience is empathy, (sympathy, and sometimes apathy); but never inside of right and wrong.
I mean, don't you get two different perspectives from a newscast when the host interviews a spectator as a opposed to a player in the event? Which one would you sooner trust for advice on how to go about taking part in the event itself? Or the spectator says the play was all wrong; whereas, the player replies, "It just didn't work there..."
Is it possible that you put EXPERIENCE (and SKILL) in the same realm as KNOWLEDGE?
What is experience but a person relating (or communicating) to something outside of his own power? Like a man in his canoe battling rapids, immersing himself in an outside force, and learning to resond and adapt to it. Increasing skill. Or like a man learning how to respond to women, and his own nature.
This is what I was driving at when I said that the best posts here have always been posts that aim at experience because the ideas are permeated through that 'application'. In keeping with this site: when someone is discussing the different kinds of expressions a woman will give you when you interact with her; how are you going to understand those ideas unless you have already experienced numerous rejections, consequently learning at a *feeling*, instinctual, GUT-LEVEL where things are at?
When you're thinking, you're analyzing; when you're feeling, you're relying on those 'banked' experiences that you've collected and the control of your nature, which allow you to interact reflexively, aren't you?
You know, because I'm Mr. SkinnyGeorge, how do I know what these guys in the Fitness Forum are talking about when they discuss their urges and different kinds of energies they're experiencing? I can gather a lot of knowledge, imagine, and define what's happening, but after working at, and actually developing big, huge, massive muscles...being in the same shoes, there'll be no need for questions, things will click.
Who gives a damn about 'right' or 'wrong'! In your post, you implied that you're 'goal-oriented', so I'm wondering if you ever put things in the frame of "Am I getting the results I want?" That frame alone. No right. No wrong.
!GEORGE GORDON!
ShortTimer
Banned
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2002
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- 917
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Re: ShortTimer
"Right" and "wrong," in the context of how I think about them, only exist in relation to the goal I am trying to achieve. Some action is "right" if it brings me closer to my goal and "wrong" if it pushes me further away. This has nothing to do with ethics.
That's becasue they are in the same realm as knowledge. Experience can be a path to knowledge and skill is a form of knowledge. You say so yourself here:
Right here you say experience leads to learning. What I am saying is that even if two people have the exact same experiences they may come to radically different conclutions.
"Does it work?" is pretty much my motto. I don't care about other considerations if something achieves my goals. Only in more extreme circumstances will I be concerned about the side effects of a particular method (while murder is always an option to get things done, under normal circumstances there would be no reason to).
"Right" and "wrong," in the context of how I think about them, only exist in relation to the goal I am trying to achieve. Some action is "right" if it brings me closer to my goal and "wrong" if it pushes me further away. This has nothing to do with ethics.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.