"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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The girl is already trying to control me!!

B-Real

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Ok here's my story. I met this girl the other night at riverbend. You may or may not what riverbend is, but its a week long concert in Chattanooga TN. This year the Allman Brothers came. But anyways I met this girl there.

I was basically drunk when I first seen her and we all were dancing in front of the stage of some cover band. Me and her got pretty close and if you had seen us you would probably think we'd known each other for years. So we go eat after we left there with a bunch of friends. She decided to sit next to me. So I know her IL is pretty high becasue I pretty much ignored her the whole night other than when we were dancing. This could have been an reaction to my drunkeness.

So a couple of days ago I called her up. I had gotten her number at the resteraunt. We kinda played cat and mouse for a few days. Their was always some excuse for me and her not to be able to get together. Some of the times it was mine and sometimes it was hers.

So today she called me up. By the way, I know she has a boyfriend. So she calls me and asks me what I am doing tonight. Well I told her I can't go anywhere because my vehicle is in the shop (which it is) and that maybe we can do something tomorrow. And after we small talked she mentioned how drunk I was the night at riverbend. I was like yeah I know that doesn't happen to often. And she says well don't drink when we go out. She says I want to get to know you and I don't want you to drink.

I understand where she is coming from becasue I was probaly an @$$hole that night but she doesn't even know me and she is already trying to boss me around. And then she is planning on us going to eat. She was like well don't eat dinner tomorrow and you and me go eat. Its like she is trying to run the show. Should I go eat since I already cancelled the first date or should I suggest we go do something else. Like ****.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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WaterTiger

Master Don Juan
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She isn't trying to control you, she just thinks you're a drunk and is probably going to hook you up with the local AA.

I agree with ProtoMan1, next her. If she'll cheat on her BF, she'll cheat on you.
 

djbr

Master Don Juan
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Think from another angle: drunk people can't fvck.

FVCK AND BAIL!
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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justsomeguy1984

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I think you are over-reacting a little. She is just telling you not to drink because she wants to know YOU, not the person you are when you are drunk. As for the dinner thing, it sounds like she strongly wants to go out with you, and that is why she is being so assertive.

As for her boyfriend, who gives a fvck? she is obviously interested in you. If you go out with her once, you will know afterward if she only wants you as a friend or wants something more. If she only wants to be friends then you can next her after the first date.
 
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