"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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The garlic breath story (read it for a laugh at least). Help me out.

ConantheLibertarian

Senior Don Juan
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No it shouldn't hold you back. Just because a woman has a "boyfriend" doesn't mean she's not down with taking a roll in the hay with the first guy who is decent enough and has the cojones to approach her.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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snowdog

Master Don Juan
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Haha... that's cool. Funny how that never crossed my mind. But she seems like a descent person... not the type of gal who goes sleeping around with random guys. Oh well, i guess i'll have to find out myself.
 

ConantheLibertarian

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Yeah it's hard to know what boyfriend means these days, there's certainly no harm in trying. At the very least, you get shot down by a chick in a relationship. No huge loss right?
 
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