"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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The debate in my head continues- A silent Next, or a "loud" one?

The_Wolf

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So the dilemma is as follows:

I'm still not sure how I should next girls. Yes, I know I shouldn't give a crap, but still...

Its either the silent next. You know, just never talk to her again (well, maybe in a few months, just to hit her again). But there is the whole "you're a f*cking slvt " speach that I just love giving them, explaining why I don't want to see them anymore.

These 2 voices in my head...one is saying "be a man, just don't talk to her, cut the drama, who cares about that b*tch". But then there's this other voice, "tell her how much she sucks and why you are not gonna talk to her anymore, so she'll know where she went wrong and what she did to you", the "Revenge" feeling.

Some insight please...what's the best thing to do?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Skel

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I didnt realize you had to insult people to next a girl or feed your ego.
 

reset

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The_Wolf said:
... But then there's this other voice, "tell her how much she sucks and why you are not gonna talk to her anymore, so she'll know where she went wrong and what she did to you"
You know that girls are never wrong, right?
 

The_Wolf

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No, that's not what I meant, sorry.
I didn't mean to do it to feed my ego, honestly, I didn't even think about it when I wrote this thread.

Fresh example from now:

This girl I know through a friend (female)..we have been texting and talking for 2 months now I think, and everytime I come to her town to chill with my friends (I don't live by there...) she can't go out or has something else to do. So I "told her off" once already, saying that I'm done with this sh*t, because she never actually wants to meet, only talks about it but never executes it. But then she sends me these long-ass messages on MSN saying how she really does wanna chill with me and that all the times she blew me off wasn't her fault.

Fine, good excuse I tell her. but a few weeks later, she still does the same ****. Last weekend I came to her town to see my friends, and I called her up when we went out. I asked her what she was doing and everything, and she says she's with her friends somewhere (we we're kind of suppose to see each other...it was some cool holiday [yeah, im not from the US anymore :) ]

So I said have a good time and hung up. A few days later I get a text saying "are you mad..?" and I said "no, you just never return messages anymore". (which was half-true). ANYWAY- I get a message now on MSN, which is a f*cking paragraph long, whinning how she didn't get any messages to her cell or MSN if that's what I meant; blah blah blah. Honestly, I'm sick of this girl, she's not worth my effort to keep this half-assed relations alive.

What do I tell her now? "f*ck off, leave me alone hoe" (LMS style) OR just not reply to her messages anymore...
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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muscleman

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Yea that's a bit different. I've "told off" girls before like that. My last LTR ended when I calmly told her (and I quote myself) "I'm done with your sh!t", walked out and never looked back. Thing is, when you tell a girl off, you better stick by your word and be very upfront about things. "no, you just never return messages anymore" is roundabout. What do you REALLY want? Hang out with her, right? Then instead you should have said, "text me when you're ready to hang out". You're only fueling the fire by playing along. Ignore until you get what you want. Or if you're really done (doesn't seem like you are), just tell her "you're unreliable and I'm not going to waste my time on flaky behavior. see ya around" <- dont even bother replying to any responses, unless you still want to see her.
 

The_Wolf

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muscleman said:
Yea that's a bit different. I've "told off" girls before like that. My last LTR ended when I calmly told her (and I quote myself) "I'm done with your sh!t", walked out and never looked back. Thing is, when you tell a girl off, you better stick by your word and be very upfront about things. "no, you just never return messages anymore" is roundabout. What do you REALLY want? Hang out with her, right? Then instead you should have said, "text me when you're ready to hang out". You're only fueling the fire by playing along. Ignore until you get what you want. Or if you're really done (doesn't seem like you are), just tell her "you're unreliable and I'm not going to waste my time on flaky behavior. see ya around" <- dont even bother replying to any responses, unless you still want to see her.

That's the answer I was looking for. Thanks for the advice.
 
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