"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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The coffee date

H

handle

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coffee must be a great date for an adult, it's casual, you're already out in town doing stuff so it's just a bit out of your way, and you can quickly scope out the other person and see if they're dating material.

so, yes, great date.

but I'm in high school. I don't have a car, I'm not busy driving around. It's the winter break. Nobody's that busy on winter break, we're all taking a breather and just relaxing.

So is coffee still a good option? I got this girl's number a few days ago, I'm gonna call her when I'm back in town, and tell her to meet me on a day like... 3-4 days in advance. But for coffee? seems odd.

Is coffee a good route here, or is there something better that's quick and easy for someone my age?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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C

Chosen1

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handle said:
coffee must be a great date for an adult, it's casual, you're already out in town doing stuff so it's just a bit out of your way, and you can quickly scope out the other person and see if they're dating material.

so, yes, great date.

but I'm in high school. I don't have a car, I'm not busy driving around. It's the winter break. Nobody's that busy on winter break, we're all taking a breather and just relaxing.

So is coffee still a good option? I got this girl's number a few days ago, I'm gonna call her when I'm back in town, and tell her to meet me on a day like... 3-4 days in advance. But for coffee? seems odd.

Is coffee a good route here, or is there something better that's quick and easy for someone my age?
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Well, it depends on yourself and the person. if she is your average highschool girl then no this is not a good idea unless she really really digs you. If she is smarter then your average highschool girl and mature then fine you can b.s with her. If I were you I would throw the whole idea of dating out the window. I will no longer date anyone for now own I will only have fun with a person and chill with them.
 
K

killerasp

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just to throw in my 2 cents:

what do kids in your town/city do for fun? hang out at the mall? watch movies? go to sporting events? whatever you chose to do with her, keep it fun! IMO, that is key. coffee dates are fine but it doesnt work for everyone. my personal thing is to do something fun on the first date. it gives you and your date a chance to get to know each and enjoy something fun. later on, if you want to go to a cafe and get some cake or coco, then go for it, but save this for later on.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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