The Boyfriend

[Jake Steed]

I agree with Bigbill.

To krd, I also think this girl is mentioning her "BF" to fvck with you and make herself seem more like a hot commodity, as you said.

Personally, I think she's a stroker, or attention hore. Which means you take anything she says with a grain of salt.

I would recommend two courses of action IF you want to fvck her:

1. Next time you talk to her make sure you talk about other girls. Ususally you want to steer the convo towards her, but since she's an attention hore, you should not talk about her at all. Everything you talk about should remind you of your friend Rebecca or Sandy, who did this or that. "Casually" mention some cute thing your girlfriend did last weekend that you were reminded of. Always talk about your gf.

2. Turn the situation around like MrNasty did. Be a smooth ****y motherfvcker. When she mentions her bf, ignore her or be rude, and then TELL her you're taking her out. Be more aggressive with her than you normally would.

Jake

 

[krd]

This is definitely not the first girl I've met who likes to talk about her boyfriend. There are quite a few girls I've met who bring him up every chance they get. I haven't really talked to this girl enough times to know if she is the same way.

But I really don't think she's an "attention hore". She always seems interested in what I have to say as well. It's not like she's one of those girls who never shut up. She actually seems pretty polite and considerate.

JakeSteed, I like your advice about talking about other girls in front of her. But I definitely don't feel comfortable saying that I have a girlfriend when I really don't. I think the lie will eventually catch up with me, especially once we get to know each other more. But I guess it wouldn't hurt to talk about some other girls I know, just so that she doesn't think I only talk to her.

 

[krd]

Well it happened again with this girl today in the student area. Three times as a matter of fact. The first time, at the beginning of the day, I was sitting there looking at my textbook. When she walks by me on the way to her office (she works in the student area), she deliberately steps on the end of my foot lightly. I look up and she smiles and says hi.

Soon, it's time to go to class. So as I'm about to leave, I go by the office and wave to her. She asks me "So how are you doing?" as if she wants me to stay and talk, but I tell her I have to get to class. In an almost disappointed tone, she says, "Okay, well, I'll see you later."

The second time, I am outside the building with my back turned, when I suddenly feel a little tug at my backpack. I quickly turn around to see what it is and sure enough, it's her. This time she's with a couple of other guys, probably on their way to lunch. Again, she smiles and says hi as she walks away.

The third time was what really threw me. It was in the afternoon; I was sitting in the student area again when she comes up to me, this time with a fat, kind of nerdy looking fella. She says "I'd like you to meet my boyfriend"(I guess she doesn't go for looks!) At this point, I want to scream, but I continue to play it cool, smile and shake his hand. We talk briefly, but as he sees I'm kind of looking at the television, he says something like "Well, I'll let you get back to what you were doing." I have to say, he was a pretty nice guy. As I walk away, I hear her telling him about who I am, how we met, etc.

Well, I wasn't expecting that! I knew all along she had a boyfriend, but to actually have him come up to meet me? At least if they'd have just walked by me, I'd have known she didn't want me to see him with her. But now that this has happened, it shows she couldn't care less what I think. I doubt she was ever interested in me at all (I knew it was a possibility, but I needed something to hope for!).

Now I know this guy can't compete with me in the looks department by any means, but he has something I don't. Maturity. This guy looks like he could have been about 30. I think I remember her saying once that he was studying to be an enginneer or something. She also mentioned she was going to college to better herself just in case, but was planning on settling down eventually and let her boyfriend be the provider. How is a guy like me with a babyface and boney liitle body, who still lives at home supposed to compete with that?

So now I'm wondering if I should keep on practicing my DJ skills on this girl and see what happens, or just forget about her and consider it a lost cause. I'm confused, because if a girl who is paying this much attention to me isn't interested, what are the chances of a girl who doesn't? I know most of you say I should just move on to another girl, but quite honestly, I don't really have anything to move on to. Of course, there's always that bus stop girl, but in a previous post, I was told that she probably wasn't interested and I should just forget her. It's hard for me to find a girl who even shows any kind of interest at all. I'm kind of running out of options here!

[This message has been edited by krd (edited 11-27-2001).]

 

[BubbaDaPimp]

4F club - find her, Feel her, Fvck her, forget her.....


steal her away, use her for YOUR cause, and expect her to be looking for another the whole time.

Bubba

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Hay how come I wanta makem feel so good and I still cant standem?

 

[crowes22]

Originally posted by TesuqueRed:
Shadow and Shinji are both right. My first reaction is along Shadow's lines, but then a girl w/a BF told me that women have to be prepared to move immediately out of a BF-situation if the right guy came along (it was a hint to me, btw, which I decided to ignore for various reasons).

She was right, I've seen quite a number of women hold a guy in a sort of "holding pattern" in a relationship: lukewarm interest, occasional sex for each other and a guaranteed date for all those weddings and group dates you go on--and then ease him out when something more exciting came along. He's often a little clueless about what's going on.

Blame her? Not really, she's just doing what's in her natural interest and playing the game. And it may be no game, too, expecially if he IS the right guy. Blame the old BF for being clueless and never bothering to learn the game (being a DJ!)

Actually, you'll find a lot of established relationships/marriages came about that way.

I know this to be true. Some here know how I detest hearing "she'll do the same to you" or "she's using you for an ego stroke" Don't listen to this horseshyt. If you protect yourself, she can't use you for the ego stroke.

I have had success in eliminating a BF. My advice is be patient, play it cool, don't get jealous. I suggset showing interest through kino. Then it's up to her. She has to chase. Just use the normal DJ methods after this.

 

[Rebel Leader]

I'm with BigBill -- I think the definition of boyfriend needs some work. Don't the Canadians have an intermediate status they call "beau" that describes someone you date regularly but who isn't exclusive with you?

That's what we need here.

For lack of a better word, there have been men whom I have described as my "boyfriend", but not because I felt exclusive with them or because I felt dedicated to creating a long term relationship with them. It was more like having sex moves them into boyfriend status. Maybe it's related to that emotional bonding thing that happens to women due to sex.

One's sexual status really is no one else's business, so let's say we take that out of the equation. Then what do you call the person with whom you have a relationship of several dates but no sex, no exclusivity, but high interest? The vernacular needs a tune-up.

I think I'll start a new thread.

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Live ... Love ... Laugh

 

[SoSuave.com]

To The Archive.

 

[jbomb]

Alright here is my story:
First of all, ive been friends with this girl for almost 2 1/2 years now. We work together, and im friends with her bf.(not good friends, but friends) Anyway she always likes talking to me, but in our conversations she talks about her bf alot. I dont mind being the nice guy i am, we talk and have a good time. I was reading on this don juan stuff and it gave me some hints on what women do if they are interested, well she just started doing some of the things recently. Im to afraid to do anything about it because it might ruin the friendship, and im afraid that if i dont it might ruin my life. You might not believe me but this girl is not the best looking, but her personality is just unbelievable. I think i love her, actually i know i love her, but so far the only way to show it is to be a friend. I want more than that, give me some advice please!!!

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blah, blah, & blah

 

[penkitten]

bump the old dear thread where advise was gold.