My game has gotten pretty tight over the past couple years, in part to many on here. The one thing I still struggle with however is finding the right balance showing interest in the early stages with a girl. I have a HUGE ego, and unless the girl shows blatant signs she's into me upfront, I have a hard time succumbing to the slightly beta behavior necessary to progress further with certain females. I feel like I've lost many quality women simply because I'm too stubborn to put forth myself in a way that makes me vulnerable, if she isn't showing am overwhelming amount of interest in me. Maybe it's a defense mechanism? I don't know. I've gotten burned showing my cards too early, as well as not showing my cards at all. Something I'd like to get polished. Any input on this?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
The balance of interest: Not enough or too much
- Thread starter JonnyD123
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Glassguy
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Same here. Failed relationships can hurt and leave scars. Over time we get calloused and fear letting go with someone because we know first hand how it feels if we invest and it doesn't work out.
All I can say is be yourself. They will be into you or they wont. Try not to be so cold that you run off a good woman. Ironically I'm in the same boat. She is getting frustrated because I rarely show emotion, but I don't want to put myself out there at this stage of the game because I have no idea if it will work out.....or if I'm ready for something besides fun dating!
All I can say is be yourself. They will be into you or they wont. Try not to be so cold that you run off a good woman. Ironically I'm in the same boat. She is getting frustrated because I rarely show emotion, but I don't want to put myself out there at this stage of the game because I have no idea if it will work out.....or if I'm ready for something besides fun dating!