"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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The Answer

Jerry Maguire

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A lot, if not all of us, registered here because they want an answer.
They want to know how to fill that hole in our lives, that feeling that we are not yet fulfilled, happy, or complete.

The general message regurgitated on here is that of self-improvement, the notion that we must grow every day and attain our goals in order to reach that fulfillment or happiness that we desire.

I have to say that I do not think this is *the answer* that you're looking for. It's the ever growing carrot that is forever dangled in front of our noses.

This came about after I studied the Bhagavad Gita, which I strongly recommend you all to read. I won't go too far in to explaining this book as I do not follow the teachings given, it mearly opened my eyes to different perspectives on the pursuit of fulfillment and how I am not going to be happy with my life even if I reach all my material or interpersonal goals.

I want something more, I think you will too and we probably all will want something more. This is the essence of desire, it is never satisfied. Therefore I doubt we'll ever fully be fulfilled.

I think we need to have a new attitude towards desire.

Not all desire in the philosophical or paradoxical sense: "Desiring to eliminate desire" but in a way that it will help and further us.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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3countriesPlan

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I was stuck in that trap before and probobly won't ever really escape it. My only desire is for everything to perfect.. I want to be able to live my life from now to my death without any big setbacks.. basically getting on the subway and taking it all the way to the last stop without it derailing. Back in the days I couldn't get girls, I was trying to catch the "***** line" cause that was my #1 priority... now I'm trying to get on the "career line", not to be confused with the "job line"
 

Jerry Maguire

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lol, I was really tired last night when I wrote that.
It was just a passing thought but worthy of consideration nonetheless.

I think, in this search for a good desire, that perhaps we shouldn't desire outcomes, but a mindset independent of them.

Surprised only to have one response so far.
 
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