"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Texting

Leah

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Now I understand sometimes texting is necessary as a dating tool, however I have had several experiences I would like to share with you, and maybe you will learn from other mistakes :)

My first text disaster (or shall I say theirs?) was a cute guy I met walking down my street. He did well, got my number and text me later that evening to ask when we were hooking up. Being a busy lady I replied 'I'll check my diary and let you know, speak soon'. Almost immediately he said 'I'm sure you can fit me in' which annoyed me, I already said I'd check my diary. He persisted all through the night to the point where I advised him he was desperate and scary. He still texts me now even though I don't reply.

The second occurrence was a guy who I'd been chasing for some time, we started meeting each other and it was going well until one night I wanted to have some space on my own. The boy text me about 20 times that night and I had to tell him to stop texting, and every day he'd ask 'when am I gonna see you then'. I would deliberately avoid the question and say something else and count the times he asked. 6 times in 15 minutes. This guy was a typical AFC, mentioning marriage after a few days, telling my mate he loved me and whenever I was quiet for more than a second he'd say 'alright?' (often 6 times in half an hour) or if I didn't want to kiss him he'd start saying 'aren't I good enough for you?' so one day I happened to say no. He is currently harrassing another poor girl.

Third occasion is somewhat like the first.

I'm sure all you DJs out here can help men like the above with tips such as wait a good 15 minutes before replying (or more) and don't appear over-eager?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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silverwex

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I'm sure all you DJs out here can help men like the above with tips such as wait a good 15 minutes before replying (or more) and don't appear over-eager?
Nah, the more AFCs in this world, the better if you ask me - less competition!
 

bbestar

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Originally posted by Leah
Now I understand sometimes texting is necessary as a dating tool, however I have had several experiences I would like to share with you, and maybe you will learn from other mistakes :)

My first text disaster (or shall I say theirs?) was a cute guy I met walking down my street. He did well, got my number and text me later that evening to ask when we were hooking up. Being a busy lady I replied 'I'll check my diary and let you know, speak soon'. Almost immediately he said 'I'm sure you can fit me in' which annoyed me, I already said I'd check my diary. He persisted all through the night to the point where I advised him he was desperate and scary. He still texts me now even though I don't reply.

The second occurrence was a guy who I'd been chasing for some time, we started meeting each other and it was going well until one night I wanted to have some space on my own. The boy text me about 20 times that night and I had to tell him to stop texting, and every day he'd ask 'when am I gonna see you then'. I would deliberately avoid the question and say something else and count the times he asked. 6 times in 15 minutes. This guy was a typical AFC, mentioning marriage after a few days, telling my mate he loved me and whenever I was quiet for more than a second he'd say 'alright?' (often 6 times in half an hour) or if I didn't want to kiss him he'd start saying 'aren't I good enough for you?' so one day I happened to say no. He is currently harrassing another poor girl.

Third occasion is somewhat like the first.

I'm sure all you DJs out here can help men like the above with tips such as wait a good 15 minutes before replying (or more) and don't appear over-eager?
Proper old english please... I don't understand a word your saying :p
 

Leah

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Well, if you don't want to help anyone out (and stop them texting me incessantly) then that shows more about you than it does for anyone else. And I certainly would not persist in asking someone to see me if they didn't respond. Ask once, that is all.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Centaurion

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What the **** is this?

We don't need anymore AWs in here.
 

Nighthawk

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Oh I don't know, from recent threads there seem to be plenty of members here who would do well to observe, from a woman's perspective, how over-texting and smothering lead to a dramatic loss of interest.
 
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\O/

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Well..you seem to attract these types of guys on a consistant basis, so maybe you should also take a look at yourself and see what kind of signals YOU are giving...

Seems like everyone you meet is a lovesick, freaky weirdo...
 

Leah

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3 men out of many, 3 men who could have been in with a better chance if only they'd read this forum...
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Bloke

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Calm down lads. A chick is free to post here.

It's a tip we all know ( there's problems if you DIDN'T KNOW THIS ! ).

This is just an example of how women will view you if smother them.

Like Jim Carrey would say :
" LAHU - ZEHER "
 

bbestar

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Originally posted by Leah
Now I understand sometimes texting is necessary as a dating tool, however I have had several experiences I would like to share with you, and maybe you will learn from other mistakes :)

My first text disaster (or shall I say theirs?) was a cute guy I met walking down my street. He did well, got my number and text me later that evening to ask when we were hooking up. Being a busy lady I replied 'I'll check my diary and let you know, speak soon'. Almost immediately he said 'I'm sure you can fit me in' which annoyed me, I already said I'd check my diary. He persisted all through the night to the point where I advised him he was desperate and scary. He still texts me now even though I don't reply.

The second occurrence was a guy who I'd been chasing for some time, we started meeting each other and it was going well until one night I wanted to have some space on my own. The boy text me about 20 times that night and I had to tell him to stop texting, and every day he'd ask 'when am I gonna see you then'. I would deliberately avoid the question and say something else and count the times he asked. 6 times in 15 minutes. This guy was a typical AFC, mentioning marriage after a few days, telling my mate he loved me and whenever I was quiet for more than a second he'd say 'alright?' (often 6 times in half an hour) or if I didn't want to kiss him he'd start saying 'aren't I good enough for you?' so one day I happened to say no. He is currently harrassing another poor girl.

Third occasion is somewhat like the first.

I'm sure all you DJs out here can help men like the above with tips such as wait a good 15 minutes before replying (or more) and don't appear over-eager?
why not consider marriage u fast old lady
 

Leah

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Thanks Bloke & NightHawk. I shall be sure to read the Bible and bookmark it to send to these Lahu-zuhers :)
 
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