"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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texting or calling after number close

j0504s

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Just want to get peoples opinion on what they do/how long they wait after a number close...

I genrally call (I wait till I feel i have met the threshold of where I am fresh in her mind) and if they dont pick up leave a msg...then if no responce i will text maybe 2 days later if nothing....NEXT

what about the rest of you DJ's?

Im reffering to a sittuation where you didnt make a set plan, or elude to anything or day to chill....
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

j0504s

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Espi said:
I am a BIG believer in waiting at least 2 days before texting...and I never call them unless they specifically ask me to. I text.

Here's a general way of how I do it:

If I get the phone number on Mon or Tues: I wait 2 days then text her "hello." I wait for a response. If she does respond, I then invite her for a Friday night drink date. I am very specific with day, time, and place of date. "Meet me for a drink or two at The Rusty Nail on eighth street at 8 pm this Friday night?"

If I get the number on Wed. .: I wait 2 days then text her "hello." I wait for a response. If she does respond, I then text an invite for a Saturday night drink date. I am very specific with day, time, and place of date. "Meet me for a drink or two at The Rusty Nail on eighth street at 8 pm this Saturday night?"

If I get the number on Thurs.: I wait 2 days then text her "hello." I wait for a response. If she does respond, I then text an invite for a Sunday night drink date. I am very specific with day, time, and place of date. "Meet me for a drink or two at The Rusty Nail on eighth street at 8 pm this Sunday night?"

If get the number on Friday, Sat. or Sun: I wait till WED of next week then text her "hello." I wait for a response. If she does respond, I then text an invite for a Friday night drink date. I am very specific with day, time, and place of date. "Meet me for a drink or two at The Rusty Nail on eighth street at 8 pm this Friday night?"

should the word "DATE" never be used, in this first text, more lets hang out chill...etc...
Obviously using the concept of assuming the sale...kinda saying we are going vs do you want to come is genrally better...
any other opinions?
 

JohnChops

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Espi said:
I am a BIG believer in waiting at least 2 days before texting...and I never call them unless they specifically ask me to. I text.

Here's a general way of how I do it:

If I get the phone number on Mon or Tues: I wait 2 days then text her "hello." I wait for a response. If she does respond, I then invite her for a Friday night drink date. I am very specific with day, time, and place of date. "Meet me for a drink or two at The Rusty Nail on eighth street at 8 pm this Friday night?"

If I get the number on Wed. .: I wait 2 days then text her "hello." I wait for a response. If she does respond, I then text an invite for a Saturday night drink date. I am very specific with day, time, and place of date. "Meet me for a drink or two at The Rusty Nail on eighth street at 8 pm this Saturday night?"

If I get the number on Thurs.: I wait 2 days then text her "hello." I wait for a response. If she does respond, I then text an invite for a Sunday night drink date. I am very specific with day, time, and place of date. "Meet me for a drink or two at The Rusty Nail on eighth street at 8 pm this Sunday night?"

If get the number on Friday, Sat. or Sun: I wait till WED of next week then text her "hello." I wait for a response. If she does respond, I then text an invite for a Friday night drink date. I am very specific with day, time, and place of date. "Meet me for a drink or two at The Rusty Nail on eighth street at 8 pm this Friday night?"
That's from anti dumps machine :)
 

TillTheEndOfTime

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I just phone whenever the hell I want. Works pretty well for me. If a girl is going to flake, she doesn't care when I phone her.
 

Plutoman

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I text when I feel like it. I've tried calling, should probably do a few more calls to break my comfort zone, but texting's suited me as I don't have to put much into it. ~80% of the numbers I've gotten are '**** it' numbers that I don't care about, so it's pretty much - text, check investment level, see if I'll get something out of it, move on if not, game if so.

I'll usually go for next day, unless next day is friday/saturday, in which case I'll wait till Sunday, Monday, or whenever.. occasionally I've forgotten about a couple numbers and waited 5-6 days or so.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Harry Wilmington

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JeffSt1980's post is on point. I always wait a minimum 4 days between a first date and next contact just so a woman's own self-doubt will make her think about me. Even if she doesn't appear all that interested on the first date, just the fact that you didn't continue to harp on her like the other 99 dudes that came before you will make her question her level of attractiveness - enough so that, when you finally hit her up again, she feels she must go out with you again and prove to you (and herself) that she's worthy of your attention. It's the reason I end up getting so many 2nd date lays :)

Anyway... I'm against men having long-standing texting convos with women (texting KILLS relationships). If a woman hits you up with a text, fine - say one or two things then ask for the date. Otherwise, you're wasting your time. Same thing once I get a woman's number - I'll get it then CALL her so she has my number in her phone... and that's it. If I decide to hit her up later I'll call and ask her out. Of course, they usually end up texting me way before I try to call them, so it still ends up working out in my favor...
 

asa_don

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Harry Wilmington said:
I always wait a minimum 4 days between a first date and next contact just so a woman's own self-doubt will make her think about me.

That's a good way for a woman to forget about you while she meets and flirts with another man.
 

NewAndImproved

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j0504s said:
Just want to get peoples opinion on what they do/how long they wait after a number close...

I genrally call (I wait till I feel i have met the threshold of where I am fresh in her mind) and if they dont pick up leave a msg...then if no responce i will text maybe 2 days later if nothing....NEXT

what about the rest of you DJ's?

Im reffering to a sittuation where you didnt make a set plan, or elude to anything or day to chill....
Depends on the situation man.

The longer & better the interaction, the longer I wait. Also, when I do reach out, it's definitely by phone because I figure she'll be comfortable enough to pick up.

If it was just a short 5-10 minute thing, I actually text the same night, some kind of "nice meeting you, [playful nickname]" with some callback humor. Then I might text a few more times in a couple of days and then call.
 

BadNews

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Always call - it shows you're confident and know exactly what you want. Also it is a good way to test her interest level - if she answers or returns a missed call she's definitely interested. Leave the texting for the high school kids who don't have the balls to call a woman. Be a man! Do the right thing!
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Uncharted

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When I get a number, it's usually someone I've recently met.

If it's the daytime, I wait until maybe 8-9PM. If I meet her out at a bar, it's when I'm going home for the night.

Quick text: Hey (her name) nice meeting you tonight - (your name)

Something quick like that just to show her that you ARE interested in her, and reminding her what your name is - that way she MIGHT think about you on her way home. Most women think "hmm he might not even call me" or they think "how many guys did i give my number to tonight"?.

Then, call her 2 days later when you think she will be available (after work, etc). Do NOT leave a voicemail. All cell phones have "missed call" notifications. She will know you called.

If she doesn't answer, wait two days and call again. Same as above. If she doesn't answer, don't contact her at all. Wait for her to text you, or call you back. If neither happens in 1 week, delete her number. She's not interested.
 
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