"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Tensing up while being watched...

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Heyjose25points

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Hey guys, does this happen to any of u?

When ur sitting down or standing up, and then u see someone is watching u(Hot girl or heck even a guy) or look right at u while ur not looking, do any of u tense up? I Want to reduce it but don't know how? Any suggestions?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Skilla_Staz

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Just realize, that if you look comfortable, and calm. She'll notice, and it's "hotter" than being all jittery.
 
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cant think of a user name

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Skilla_Staz said:
Just realize, that if you look comfortable, and calm. She'll notice, and it's "hotter" than being all jittery.
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That bit of advice is gonna put more pressure on him seeing as he is self conscious already...

But Heyjose25points, I know what you mean, I've experienced that in the past and I think the best way to deal with it is to just make eye contact with them, if only briefly. Just look at them, it's normal (if someone keeps staring at you it is normal for you to glance up to see what's going on).
 
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Heyjose25points

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Thanks alot. Yea, its usually in class...where there is a girl I know and she looks at my direction(sometimes its not even at me), i tend to tense up even when i tell my mind to stop....it just does it anyway...but its my responsibility to promote emotional freedom.

Skilla Staz: Well when i expect, I don't tense up...but when it happens out of now where, while im looking at a lecture in class and she looks at my direction, while im not looking...it usually happens. But I'll keep in my mind about looking comfortable and calm. One thing I realized is that if ur body doesn't show what ur thinking, then its hard for someone to read u...as people can't read ur mind, only ur body language. Thanks

Cant think of a user name: That sounds plausible, i'll look when i feel someone is watching me. Thanks.

Thanks guys.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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diplomatic_lies

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Its a normal human reaction to get all self-conscious when someone is watching you. And the more "important" that person is, the more self-conscious you get (ie. your boss, a supermodel, the Gestapo)

Best thing to do is return eye contact with a smile n wink (but not if its a guy)
 
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Heyjose25points

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Almost forgot, when they look at my direction...i tend to also tense up....i know its human nature but is a little fustrating.
 
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I suggest:

A. Focus your mind on something else.

or

B. Look at them and smile.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Scrumtulescence

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If it's just standing up from your chair in a room, or it's your turn to give a speech in front of 50 people, just keep in mind that everyone isn't focused on you and thinking about you nearly as much as you think you are. After all, you're just one of a bunch of people in the room.
 
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Heyjose25points

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Public Speaking is a great class to improve confidence in speaking with people. And whats funny is that u do better from the outside than u believe on the inside. But thank you all for your support. As a result, Im deciding to do the Bootcamp. I sh1t u guys not. Its something i never tried, thought i didn't need, but hey...what's the worse that could happen that I don't get as much success as I want? Atleast i know i tried. It starts today. Whats funny is that it seems to be no different than the plan one of the counselors gave me for getting through social anxiety, except the DJ stuff.
 
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