"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Talking to a girl going through a divorce

Dash Riprock

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 16, 2005
Messages
1,848
Reaction score
3,697
Location
Mile High City, USA
One thing I've come to realize in my ripe old age is that kids are marriage killers. No one could or will ever convince me otherwise. I have too many date points.

I'm a bit more senior than most on the board (>45 years old) so I can tell you once you hit a certain age, 80-90% of the women you have to choose from around your age do have kids. I date women 38-45 and as said, 80-90% have kids. I also date women 25-38 and most of those don't have kids but you have to put up with the immaturity, multi-dating carousel, flakiness, etc. So, choose your poison.

The "ideal" woman to me, or "purple squirrel/unicorn, whatever," maybe someone 40, fun, fit, attractive, good job, healthy habits and personality, do exist but are so rare and absolutely hit with beta men throwing themselves at them it's nearly impossible to garner interest with OLD and even IRL. They can also be really standoffish as they get approached so much. I've also realized there are A LOT of really desperate men out there over 40 with zero game just flinging themselves at those women with no regard to their own needs or self-respect, true White Knights.

But, it's not in my DNA to give up so I don't. But, I find myself dating many more women 15-25 years younger than me than the ones around my age because of all the baggage the older ones come with.

Don't demonize OP for dating a single mom. You're NOT a cuck, beta, white knight, etc., as long as you understated they come with additional challenges, mainly time to allocate to you because of her kids, and that you'll NEVER EVER EVER be #1 to this woman, her kids will. So, if you are ok with all that, and just plate them or hang out, go for it. They can be a lot of fun because they don't get as much action as the single, flaky, social media-addicted 25 year old fake t*it bleach blonde. Just don't try to LTR them or "date" them unless you have kids and/or that's what you want.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

marmel75

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2012
Messages
7,175
Reaction score
5,571
Thanks for the advice. Btw I'm 36 and live in region that doesnt have many choices.
Exactly your problem. Figure out a way to change that.
 

R.U.G.

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 15, 2018
Messages
1,797
Reaction score
1,218
Just know she's going through a range of emotions. Going through a divorce is one thing, going through a divorce with kids is completely another. Also know you are just the rebound guy. As soon as something new or different comes along, you'll be nexted. If you are just in it for the easy pvssy, go for it. However, I'd advise against that for both of you. It's a catch-22 and you will not like the ending.
 
Top