I'm going out with this girl for around the last two months.
I almost never talk about something that anguishes me, my problems and all.
I don't because of all the programming I had while reading this.
I totally blocked doing that from my personality, now I deal with it alone, or ask for help to specific persons.
But sometimes, when I'm feeling down I would love to drop my mask and show me how I am, and stop that lie of "everything is OK, I have no problems".
But on the other side I believe it would make me less attractive.
I don't know... anyone has experienced anything similar?
Also, I fear very much falling in love with her, showing my affection, showing my feelings, all things I WANT to do, but on the other side, I fear becoming AFC again and loosing her... I scared women in the past by being AFC.
I'm not being AFC now... don't get me wrong, but on some level I fear showing affection, that is hugging her a lot, telling her I care for her, it's AFC.
****, I'm confused...
I'm ripping apart, between what I WANT to do, and what my mind tells me it's DJ... which might be wrong...
I almost never talk about something that anguishes me, my problems and all.
I don't because of all the programming I had while reading this.
I totally blocked doing that from my personality, now I deal with it alone, or ask for help to specific persons.
But sometimes, when I'm feeling down I would love to drop my mask and show me how I am, and stop that lie of "everything is OK, I have no problems".
But on the other side I believe it would make me less attractive.
I don't know... anyone has experienced anything similar?
Also, I fear very much falling in love with her, showing my affection, showing my feelings, all things I WANT to do, but on the other side, I fear becoming AFC again and loosing her... I scared women in the past by being AFC.
I'm not being AFC now... don't get me wrong, but on some level I fear showing affection, that is hugging her a lot, telling her I care for her, it's AFC.
****, I'm confused...
I'm ripping apart, between what I WANT to do, and what my mind tells me it's DJ... which might be wrong...