"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Talk with oneitis . . .

AFK Protector

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Hello DJs in training,

I just had a chat with my oneitis. I kept it very professional. I didn't show any interest such as kino, C&F or any of that stuff. I just talked to her for like 2 minutes and I left.

I started the convo, and since last year I have not started a convo with her. She always did. So I say, "I have to get going now. Good bye."

2 steps forward, 1 step back.

I feel more of a gentleman and in control after this encounter. Am I becmoing an AFC again?

I felt ilke a burden has been lifted off my shoulders, but now it feels empty, like something is missing. I can't see where I'm going with this one. Please stop me if it seems I'm exhibiting AFC traits.

Perhaps this is a good thing...who knows. Little things like this bother me....
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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M2k961

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A guy who doesn't show interest in a girl is... a friend, or gay.

Good going.
 

AFK Protector

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Maybe I didn't give enough information.

I know it sounds cliche, but it was like a bond film. Where the chick is in bed with him, and he has to go save the world. That kind of convo.

Except I wasn't in bed with her and I didn't have to save the world. Just the kind of convo. She wanted to say something at the end, but just kinda held it back or something. What it was I will never know.

Anyways, thanks for your response. I like this feeling. This feeling of being dedicated, determined, and in control.
 

DiSt0rTi0n_07

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You are in control... sounds DJ enough to me.
Thats the good news.

Also, there is a difference between gentleman and AFC. You know the difference so im not gonna explain it to you.

The bad news?
She will prolly be the first one to tell you that you are all AFC again. :p

No worries yet man.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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MarcP

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Yeah I used to have conversations like this when I was AFC but looking back on it I think I may have been a bit of a DJ back then but just didn't have the balls to follow it through. You sound like if you're in control and worrying if you're AFC or not is AFC thinking;) . The main differance between a conversation like this between that girl and an AFC or that girl and a DJ would be the DJ has options to take it further if he wants.
She seems to like you and you're taking it just normal like. If an AFC knew his oneitis liked him he would be straight in a relationship with her. In my opinion you acted like a DJ would act.
 
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