So I've been seeing this girl casually for a few weeks, and what used to be a great fwb thing is now turning out to be kind of weird for me. The thing is, the more we hang out, the more I like her. When we're alone, we act like a couple, cuddling, fvcking, talking about common interests, etc. However, when we're hanging out with friends we act like friends...even though our friends know we ****. So now I'm trying to figure out a way to bring it up to her without freaking her out. If she doesn't want to get more serious I'd actually be cool with it, but I still want to at least make it known to her that I'm interested in maybe more. Any thoughts on how to bring this up without having her run for the hills?
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
taking the "F" out of FWB
- Thread starter Bassic
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Greasy Pig
Master Don Juan
I strongly advise you to wait for her to bring it up. Strongly.
Any overtures from you signals desperation. If she really likes you, she'll bring up exclusivity. In the meantime, just keep on fvcking.
Any overtures from you signals desperation. If she really likes you, she'll bring up exclusivity. In the meantime, just keep on fvcking.
cordoncordon
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 2, 2006
- Messages
- 2,889
- Reaction score
- 109
You don't bring it up. You let her bring it up. You just keep acting the same way, showing her good sexing and fun when you together, and IF she is at all interested in taking this further, she will let you know. If you bring it up? Nothing good can come of it.
First off I don't want to wife her...I just want to see how things would work out if we were in an actual relationship. Secondly, I have casual sex with multiple women so passing judgement on her would be considered a double standard in my book, and I'm just not down with that sort of thing.PairPlusRoyalFlush said:
As for the other responses, thank you for the hasty advice. You guys are prolly right...a bird in hand is worth two in the bush, right?
Right....let's just agree to disagree then. The point of my post was that I want to try and get into a committed relationship, and needed advice on how to make that happen, not your subjective definition of "wife up" or "double standard".PairPlusRoyalFlush said:
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Kailex
Master Don Juan
So what's the problem with what you guys are doing right now? Why change it?Bassic said:
Don't try to lock her down, she's supposed to be trying that with you. You might need to start seeing her a little less.
The problem is that when we are hanging out with friends, I'd still like to be close to her and flirty and stupid crap like that. I'm not trying to get any hardcore pda action in front of the friends, but being flirty while hanging out with others is mildly foreplay for me lol. But no, you're right, I need to prolly see her less, and try and get the gears spinning in her head maybe?Kailex said:
Edit: p.s.
Also I want an exclusive deal.
Scaramouche
Master Don Juan
Dear All,
I despair,is this a marriage agency or a site for Don Juans?
I despair,is this a marriage agency or a site for Don Juans?
Lol yeah I got it...wifing up means dating exclusively. I still don't...nor will I ever...agree that it's not a double standard to pass judgement on a girl that sleeps around, when I myself, sleep around. I don't care as long as she isnt doing that while I have her (wait for it) wifed up.Espi said: