"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Tables turned - What happened???

joemomma

New Member
Joined
Nov 6, 2005
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
Alright, so I meet this chick through a good friend of mine and we spend 5 or 6 drunken nights together after the bar over the next month. At this point I'm certain she really digs me, a couple of her friends made sure I knew that much.

I don't like rushing into anything that resembles serious because I'm a picky dude and usually just get fed up with chicks if I see too much of them, so I didn't initiate any sort of talks about where the thing was going and what she wanted to do with it.

After a couple weeks I decide "OK, this girl is cool as hell - what the fvck, I'll give it a shot with her." So I increase the weekly call count to 2 max - always on a bar night, and mention that we should get together and watch a movie or something soon. Around this point her calls drop off, and the next week when I see her at the bar she straight up jets inside without a word to me. I call her on it the next day and she says she just 'needs her space', and can't have a boyfriend because she sucks at relationships and always pussies out. "We should just be friends for awhile". I let her know that I'm not into serious relationsips and tell her she knows where to find me.

How did the tables turn like this? I thought I was playing things fairly well, and DEFINITELY wasn't giving her too much attention. I can't decide if she thought I was just not interested in her and wanted out to avoid being hurt, or if she actually lost interest in me. Is this worth pursuing in any way?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

wowiehowie

Banned
Joined
Oct 4, 2005
Messages
171
Reaction score
0
Originally posted by joemomma
...we spend 5 or 6 drunken nights together after the bar over the next month.
Don't know about you, but I think her problem or potential problem with alcohol would turn me off. A serious character flaw - and I'll bet there will be more.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
Originally posted by joemomma
Any thoughts?
Tables turned? Not really. What happened is that you tried to change the dynamics of the relationship. Everything was going fine with you guys being beer buddies (or whatever) and then you had to try to get serious.

Had you ever thought why this woman didn't complain about how you guys hung out originally? Do you think women who would want to be in a relationship would behave the way that she did? Not to say that there is anything wrong with her, just that she has different priorities.

Guys, learn how to read a woman by her actions and not just go by your own wants. This is the main reason guys get supposedly confused by a woman's actions. Yes, they may change their minds often but more times than not the problem arises when she wants something different than you.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Top