"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Table for one please....

Designer Man

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Since being single I often go out for meals alone to different restaurants. Not all the time but occasionally when I don't feel like cooking at home. I'm currently at nandos as I type this. Does anyone else do this?

Can feel a bit strange when you see other couples eating together or groups of friends but it's something that doesn't bother me.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Roober

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Nothing wrong with that at all. I still, while in an LTR, occasionally get meal alone. I usually just sit at the bar.

Having a feeling of doubt is just a product of a society that tells us if we dont have a relationship, there is something wrong with us...
 

backseatjuan

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Also, if you see two dudes or two girls sitting at the bar alone or walking together, it does not mean they are gay, they are just friends.
 

oldmanofthesea

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Going out to eat or to a movie alone was one of the most difficult things to get used to after my divorce. I felt so alone and like such a loser and felt that people were judging me. A big part of that was likely due to how raw a person can feel after a divorce, and also having to get used to things being different.

It's been said in the DJ Bible and many other places that you should be happy and truly enjoy your own company. Until you get there, you won't be happy with a girl, and you'll likely be needy toward women because you *need* that companionship to avoid being alone. Instead, spend the time learning to be comfortable with it.

After 2.5 years post-divorce, I'm so comfortable with it that I didn't even think about it until I read your thread. Like you, I'm sitting here by myself at a table for one having my dinner and not feeling the least bit lonely.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Fzatf

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I like to eat out a lot. I prefer to do it with company but people I know don't want to eat out as much as I do. As I'm typing this I'm alone at a sushi restaurant. No big deal. I wouldn't sweat it.
 

corrector

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Going out to eat or to a movie alone was one of the most difficult things to get used to after my divorce. I felt so alone and like such a loser and felt that people were judging me. A big part of that was likely due to how raw a person can feel after a divorce, and also having to get used to things being different.
I don't see how going to a movie alone would mean anything. People are there to see the large screen.

Nevertheless, I have a set of rules I tend to follow when I go to the cinema (a practice which has faded out of my life). I would go in the afternoon showings, 1 - 4pm, avoid Matinee crowds, avoid going on Friday and Saturday nights, and if you can reserve a seat, make sure you get one where it's centered so you get the maximum viewing experience. Also, visit a cinema when the movie is about to be taken off the cinema. By this time the hype of the movie has died down and you may only get one or two souls inside the same cinema or even get an empty cinema to which to enjoy the movie all by yourself!

I do not have a set of rules for eating solo since I don't actually do that. I would imagine I'd probably bring a tablet or portable device with some head-phones if the environment bothered me, so at least my mind could be distracted by something else so as not to really care about that if I'm there for an extended period of time beyond eating the meal. Or, at the very least, as a Christian believer, knowing Jesus is present inside of me so I don't care what other people think about me as long as I'm right with God. If I feel lonely then it's because my prayer life is neglected and it's my fault.
 

Mike32ct

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I love to dine out alone. I do it all the time without giving it a second thought.

When I’m eating with somebody else, I do NOT enjoy dinner conversation. When I’m really hungry and trying to eat is when the other person wants to talk non-stop and ask me 100 questions lol.

Eating alone is an introvert’s dream and a great way to unwind.

TLDR: Talk to me after dinner or over drinks. When I’m trying to shovel food down, I like to be alone.
 
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Spaz

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It's a rare pleasure for me to be able to dine alone, something I get to do on rare occasions and it's moments like this that I'm able to savour the moment, the ambience - the quiet still air of the night, the stars, the rumblings of leaves, chirping noises by creatures of the dark etc etc.

I'd go to my favourite steakhouse that's by the beach and get to savour a bloodied piece of meat in relative quiet.

Some guys don't know how good they have it in life.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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