"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Strange question

Pimp-sicle

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Ok I've got a question but I've got to explain the scenario first, so bare with me on this.

Ok I recently broke up with a girl I was dating for the past 7 months. So that's that, no whining, no regreting my decision to bail on her, even when she called me after the break up to try and fix things, I still refused. I'm a huge proponent of keeping ex's as ex's for the most part. Meaning you broke up for a reason. One of our mutal friend's, her former best friend and a close friend of mine use to have a thing for me before me and my ex started messing around and dating.

However once I got together with my ex, the mutal friend pretty much backed off. Me and the mutal friend actually became very close, she'd call me everyday, we'd go to lunch, we'd party together, she'd come over to my apartment and get wasted with me etc. She's always told me she found me very attractive, she said she was sexually attracted to me and that she definitely had a crush on me when we first met. These are all drunk confessions btw....LOL I love alcohol. Towards the end of my relationship with me ex, the mutal friend was quickly annexed from my ex's friend list because my ex got very jealous that she called me all the time. This definitely upset me and its one of the reasons I bailed on my ex. I stopped hanging out with the mutal friend as much once me and my ex got serious due to her jealousy. I'd still call her and she'd still call me, we'd chill out everyonce in a while but not even close to as much as before.

So about a month ago now the former mutal friend texted me during the day telling me she was listening to a certain song and she wanted to hang out since we haven't seen eachother for weeks. I was at work during the time so I didn't get her missed call until much later. In between that time she called me again telling me that she wanted to see what was going on with my life and for me to call her. I went out to a bar after work that night and got fukin' drunk with a few friends. When I got home I gave her a call and told her we should hang out. She said since I was drunk she'd come over to my place.

When she came over I jokingly told her that me and her were definitely going to make out before she left. I was laughing and so was she. I kept on bugging her about it and she just kept laughing it off. I told her that I knew I was trashed and if she didn't want to make out just tell me and I'd drop it. She said she wanted to but that it was just weird because I kept bringing it up.

So I tell her to go lay on my bed and lets get this outta the way..LOL She follows my orders and we start making out. We both start laughing but nonetheless keep going at it. One thing leads to another and I tell her to get naked because I really wanted to sleep with her. Yes, I admit I'd never seduce a girl like this ever, but since it was such a close friend it was akward to try and be suave with her. So she easily obliges, strips off her clothes and we go at it for a bit.

I could definitely tell it was slightly akward for her and when she left everything seemed chill. However over the next few weeks she kinda stopped calling me as much or would only text me once in a while.

So here's my question. I was thinking it would be cool to be fuvk buddies with her, but if not its not a big deal. I texted her and told her I sensed she felt things were akward and that I thought we were going to be friends with benefits. I also said if that was too weird for her then its all good because I value her friendship a lot. And that's the truth guys, I could've dated this girl a while back and there were numerous times I could've fuvked her brains out before I was with my ex but I wasn't into her back then. She texted me agreeing that it was a little akward but its all good. I just want to know if there's a way I can get her as a fuvk buddy while still maintaining our close friendship? I would totally be down to date her if she felt the same way but its not a big deal to me.

Any thoughts on how I can make her feel more comfortable around me? I think she felt it was akward because we've been good friends for a while now and then we suddenly hooked up. Not to mention that she probably feels like a rebound hook up, since she was the first girl I fuvked after I left my ex. I know not really the best situation to make a "friend" feel comfortable.



PIMP
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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italostud

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Make up your mind. What do you want? Friend/girl to date/fukfriend?
 

Pimp-sicle

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Italostud:

LOL...good point!!! I'm trying to get a better idea of what she's thinking. Like I said I'd definitely date her if I knew the attraction was there, but if all it ended up being was friends with benefits that would be fine with me as well. However throughout this whole twisted reality I don't want to lose her friendship, she's the sweetest chick, a really good person, and that's rare these days to find a level headed chick.

I guess it doesn't really matter to me either way, but I don't want to lose her completely, that would sux. Has anyone been in a similar situation, how'd you play it out?


PIMP
 

italostud

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If you don't know what you want, how are you going to decide on a course of action? All you can do at this point is leave everything up to her.
 

Pimp-sicle

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Yeah your right, but I guess the whole point of this thread was to try and figure out if there were others out there who have had a similiar situation. And how they handled it? What they would do differently if they had a chance? The way I see it, this girl and I are really good friends, I've never been attracted to her like that before and I really don't think I'm attracted to her like that now, but once you hook up all sorts of thoughts and scenarios run through your head.

I guess I'll just chill, because I really don't feel like pursuing anything with her.


PIMP
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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