"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Strange Girl

Disco

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2002
Messages
351
Reaction score
1
Location
Ope
I was talking to this chick and then she became unreachable about two weeks ago. I left her one message, she didn't call back and I didn't try her again. This morning this was in my email.
Not sure how to handle this. She's hot, but at the same time I don't appreciate the flakey behavior at all.


"Hola....I just was thinking about you today for some reason and wanted to say hi. I hope you have recoved well from the weekend in Atlanta. So...since I'm not nearly as clever as you I'll just ask you...when are we going hiking? Or, when are we going anything? I think eithered be lovely. "

Advice please. I'd still love to do something with her, but damn. I mean should I put off getting back to her?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Disco

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2002
Messages
351
Reaction score
1
Location
Ope
ok so no advice from you guys. this is what i replied with. i mean i can either wait a few days and let the games continue or get them over with now.

"What a surprise to hear from you. I actually thought that you went into Internet Retirement. Then I realized that your only 23 and need to be 25 to do that. Your question is when are we going to hang out? I don't know, with your recent disappearance your stock has almost bottomed out.

Well you wanna go hiking? It starts with returning a phone call. I went 10 miles last weekend like I had planned and I'm going to Florida for a long one this weekend. If you wanna do something on the weekend of the 19th I'm game. We can talk about it more on the phone after you refer to step one on how to go hiking. Hiking, dinner and hanging out with me is what I'm offering. That's usually the jackpot for the Georgia lottery so I consider that a damn good deal. "
 

Caveman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 22, 2001
Messages
694
Reaction score
2
Location
NL
Only thing I don't like:

Well you wanna go hiking? It starts with returning a phone call.
Imo this shows you're a little upset with her not calling. But then the rest of the mail is C&F. You are telling her your life is not on hold cuz she hasn't returned your call. Sounds pretty okay with me.

I am pretty sure however that she is trying to see if she can reel you back in after not answering your call for 2 weeks. My advice would be: Be careful and watch her actions closely.
 

Disco

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2002
Messages
351
Reaction score
1
Location
Ope
I'm not upset at all actually. I was just telling her that would be a start b/c I made the last call.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Caveman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 22, 2001
Messages
694
Reaction score
2
Location
NL
Okay: let me put it this way: If I think that says you're upset, NewMan thinks you're upset.. wouldn't she think you're upset?

It comes off a little bitter. Maybe you didn't mean it like that, it just comes off that way. But like I said: the rest of the mail was C&F so you probably shouldn't think too much about it.
 

Pimp-sicle

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2003
Messages
2,457
Reaction score
101
Location
Pimpsylvania
I think your reply was perfect. You let her know that you don't tolerate disrespect and that it doesn't bother you that much. Way to hold your head up and be a man. Don't invest too much time in this girl when she's not investing too much time in you.



PIMP
 

Disco

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2002
Messages
351
Reaction score
1
Location
Ope
thanks caveman. we'll see what happens and i'll post it to this thread. she is either going to tell me to f.o. or appoligize and go with me. if she goes i'm sure it'll be a good night in the end. she did tell me that she dated a guy for 5 years that was an a$$hole so i'm sure this is right up her alley.
 

NatureGuy

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 4, 2003
Messages
369
Reaction score
0
I also agree with Caveman on this one. You
do sound a little upset or annoyed, and as he says, be careful.
 

Disco

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2002
Messages
351
Reaction score
1
Location
Ope
Who cares. I wrote this chick off anyway. If she wants to pick it up with me it is her that is going to have to do some work.

I also think that the way you read things is a reflection on the way you are used to people talking to you. Me, I'm a pretty confident person. A bit narcistic, so I would read that as a road map on how to hang out with me. To me it's more of an underlying message about respecting me. And the way that you do that is by meeting me in the middle.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

DJ_Dork

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 29, 2003
Messages
1,178
Reaction score
0
Age
48
Originally posted by Disco
Who cares. I wrote this chick off anyway. If she wants to pick it up with me it is her that is going to have to do some work.

I also think that the way you read things is a reflection on the way you are used to people talking to you. Me, I'm a pretty confident person. A bit narcistic, so I would read that as a road map on how to hang out with me. To me it's more of an underlying message about respecting me. And the way that you do that is by meeting me in the middle.
that's the right attitude. email her back and agree, but she has to come to your place, not meet at some place.
 

Phrozen

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 10, 2002
Messages
307
Reaction score
0
Location
Florida
Thats ****y, but the funny is absent.

I agree with being a bit smug with her, but with that reply I don't think you've really provided her with any reason to look forward to your next get together. Keep it more light hearted. It should come across like you're teasing her, not scolding her.
 

Tkman

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 31, 2003
Messages
297
Reaction score
0
Age
57
Originally posted by Disco
"Hola....I just was thinking about you today for some reason and wanted to say hi.
Bull**** this chick is used to idiots leaving her 873324 messages and now because you stood your ground, you shock her.


The hunted will become the hunter !!!!!!!!!
 

Disco

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2002
Messages
351
Reaction score
1
Location
Ope
Thanks for all the input. Just two years ago I would've never of handle it like this. I do think some of it is funny, she knows my sense of humor but has pushed to the stern side until now. She'll call come over and I'll get ladi within the next 10 days tops.
 
Joined
Nov 6, 2003
Messages
4,280
Reaction score
8
Location
Wisconsin. USA
Write, "Were you in a coma for the past few weeks? I'm glad you recovered and have the strength to go hiking - give me a call so that I know that this is you writing this e-mail and not an imposter!"
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Top