squashed out?

[Jeremymichael]

Hi guys I would like to get your perspective on this. There
is a girl I like who works in a bar.

There is a girl I have dated (sort of) a couple of time playing
squash. But she now has a boyfriend.

I decided after she started seeing him to cut all ties, no contact
whatsoever. But I still went to the bar occasionally, but not as
often to see the live music.

Last night I went in and she came upto me and said, I haven't heard from you in ages, when are we playing squash next.
Brian is away on holiday (notice name used not boyfriend, I don't know his name anyway).

I said I could play Tuesday and she agreed, anyway she went
away and continued to work. I had absoulutely no plan to play
squash and had decided to just leave it.

Anyway 9-30am this morning, just at work and she calls me. I
have just woken up and wanted to know if you still want to play
tomorrow?. This took me off guard because she is normally flaky.
Anyway I have booked a court for tomorrow, to be honest I am
happy as it just as a friendship till I find something better. Would be interested in your thoughts on the situation?

 

[MVPlaya]

Maybe she likes to play squash.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Find out what her b/f situation is...if they are stiill together then do not keep her company any longer..if she keeps inviting you during the next few weeks tell her you just got a 'tennis elbow' injury and you are out of commission! SQUISH!!!

 

[Jeremymichael]

playing squash again today at 2.40pm. Question is do I make
an approach. Two weeks ago I know she had a boyfriend, who is
aparently away somewhere. But at the end of the game on Wednesday, she said she had a really good time, but before
we kissed on both cheeks. It was a bit wierd I wasn't sure whether to kiss her or not and then I said we must go for a drink soon and she agreed. Then she mimicked a kiss on both cheeks and she left. She kept saying what a good time she had had.

Question is what what is the protocol for a man unsure whether to give a hug or kiss, if you suspect she has a boyfriend. Before she was doing it and now she has stopped. Then the following night I saw one of her friend and she gave me a big smile and asked how the game of squash went? and she said I understand your playing again on Saturday.

hmmm..........

 

[Jeremymichael]

if someone could reply in the next half an hour it would help, coz I've got my squash date

 

[The_King]

Man...

Go for it....the kiss that is. What have you got to lose, a squash partner at present, thats no big deal. You said you broke all contact with her for awhile before so you know yourself you don't need her friendship. So, go for the kiss, thats the only sure way to find out rather than beat yourself up mentally as to whether you should and when.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by MVPlaya
Maybe she likes to play squash.

LOL...at any rate, a lot of what's missed in a lot of these tales is the subtle nonverbal communication that goes on between two people. If it's good, then I'd say you're moving nicely. If it's not good, then you're probably her "squash-buddy" for life.

I get the feeling you made SOME impression, though. Maybe "Brian is away" is her way of saying, "so my bed has an opening for the next couple days."

"We should get a drink sometime" is weak. It's like you're asking her, "Can we go get a drink sometime?" And believe me, that fact isn't lost on her. What I would've done is asked her to go somewhere immediately after the game. If she refuses, then set something up for later on. Make sure she makes no mistake about your intentions, and read her response. Whether she accepts or rejects, if her response is positive, keep at it. If it's negative, you may just need to back off until you find another "squash partner."

Oh, and I hope for your sake that Brian isn't big enough to kick your ass.

 

[Jeremymichael]

well we played, and at the end I asked her next time we go and have a pizza and a few drinks, and she politely turned me down saying she works nights apart from Wednesday when she see her
friends. So finally the whole thing is off, I sensed today the chemistry was lacking so now what I need to do is get out of being squash buddy and move on. In honesty, maybe she sensed by insecurity and it turned her off.