So a friend of mine talked me into going to a speed dating thingy tonight. I figure it won't hurt, and hey, we get free wine and beer!!! So anyways, do any of you have any speed dating experience? Can anyone give me some tips on doing this? I have no clue about the quality of the women I'll be talking to, but I meet with each girl for 8 minutes, which seems long for speed dating. Anyhow, any tips or advice would be much appreciated. Thanks.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
speed dating
- Thread starter Rockstar
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Try to think up some original things to talk about. EVERY guy will ask the girls what they do for work, what they do for fun, etc. This gets old when 20 people ask you this.
In a similar vain, come up with some good answers to common questions you'll be hearing.
In a similar vain, come up with some good answers to common questions you'll be hearing.
I have NEVER done something like this. But, I can see myself having some success.
Why? Because I truly won't care. I would go there for the wine and to have fun. And let my personality (borderline cucky and with lot of fun) take over.
The odds are that at least one of about 20 women would like what she sees.
Another thing, I won't go alone. I don't have a problem going to places ALONE (such as nightclubs, etc.), because I tend to meet males there anyway (a woman see me talking with the bouncer, other cool people, and authomatically think that I KNOW those cool dudes too). But in a place like speed dating? I'm not there to mingle with guys (a nightclub is okay). So, bringing a couple of male friends (social proof) might be appropriate on this.
Why? Because I truly won't care. I would go there for the wine and to have fun. And let my personality (borderline cucky and with lot of fun) take over.
The odds are that at least one of about 20 women would like what she sees.
Another thing, I won't go alone. I don't have a problem going to places ALONE (such as nightclubs, etc.), because I tend to meet males there anyway (a woman see me talking with the bouncer, other cool people, and authomatically think that I KNOW those cool dudes too). But in a place like speed dating? I'm not there to mingle with guys (a nightclub is okay). So, bringing a couple of male friends (social proof) might be appropriate on this.
Whenever I'm in a position to join one of those things, I'll join in. Why? Because it's just another opportunity for women to see the difference between me and other fvcks. I mean, guys who go to that stuff have nothing on me. Neither do guys that go to the gyms, clubs, supermarket. Nor the guys walking on the street, sleeping, wherever, no guy has nothing on me. I'm excellence, and I'm raw.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Don Juan Montoya
Don Juan
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Dont ask the same bullsh1t that every other geek asks. Be different. I had crap luck w/ speed dating. Alot of chubbies. It seemed like alot of the chicks went there because they saw it in a movie & thought it would be fun. Or they went because there friend went & kept them company. Its not cheap too. $38 here in orange county...
Livinlifehard
Don Juan
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- Dec 19, 2006
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oh i am going now to one