"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Special Situation

StarmanDeluxe

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I've got a lot of momentum going with this one girl, but there's a problem. It's summer, and she's about to leave for a 7-week vacation. I really want to cement this one down before she leaves because I know this girl is definite LTR potential and that is definitely what I want from her.

So, she leaves day after tomorrow. How can I ask her to hang with me for a while when she's (probably) busy getting ready? I mean, I think I can handle things once they're in place, but I dunno what to say to get together for the day. Any suggestions?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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NRM

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"Hey, looks like you're leaving soon, how about we go on a quick date and get some coffee or a bite to eat?"

If she's interested in you enough, she'll find an hour out of her schedule to chat with you over some coffee. If she gives you a raincheck for after, she's not interested in you enough to give up a day of packing and getting ready.

Depending on how hetic it is, you never know. But if you involve the word quick, you say quick and it means quick, then she shouldn't decline.
 

wh01987

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If shes leaving for that long and hasnt gotten into you that much then she most likely wont say yes (as in bf gf). She probably would rather be free and not tied down and would more likely say yes when she got back. Just take her on a "quick" date or whatever and try and call her cell while shes gone every once in a while or somthin
 

check_mate_kid_uk

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wh01987 you are wrong, just because she is not in to him and is about to go on vacation, means nothing. She might not want to, or might not be ready to go further but the fact she hasnt does not necciserly mean so much, you can not conclude that with so little information given. Firstly do not start calling her so much because thats genrally a bad move. Sure going on a date would be good, then leave it and when she comes back pick up form where you left off and then you can ask her if you want a relationship.

hope ive been a help
 

splinterkb

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I suggest you dont ask her out until after her vacation.... if you ask her out before, it will be bad. 1... you wont get to talk to her much, so you wont have any time to build on the relationship at the beginning where it matters most... 2... on a 7 week trip, i wouldn't want to worry about her getting drunk and ****ing some guy.. women are scandalous... 3... it wont be as much fun for either of you since you'll both miss eachother more.... 4... just dont do it.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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