"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Something to keep in mind with online dating

Blank

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Personally, I don't do it. I was curious about it though. Is it an untapped resource? A gold mine? What's my competition like online?

I got a female friend to make a really simple profile on match.com. Her profile got approved on Sunday. Here is a link:

http://www.match.com/profile/showprofile.aspx?ortp=1&TP=U&uid=AIepraJprzz9TD05OVrfUg==&lid=21

She's gotten 35 emails and over 100 winks since it got approved. It's crazy, about half came on the first night and shes been getting a bunch more each day. Could you imagine if it were this easy for a guy?

After she gets 50 emails, we're going to use the free 3 day trial and read through them to see what these guys are saying.

Anyways, I've learned that if I'm going to even think about attempting any online stuff, I'd better have a damn good pic and a really "sticky" profile.

Not sure if it's worth it though, any good looking girl can hop on and make a profile and be flooded with guys 1 day after. Crazy. I think I'd rather just get out there and approach.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Veridin

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Wow, your friend is very pretty. And she is smiling and looks like a nice person, too. I can imagine she gets many messages. She looks very young; I would have guessed eighteen from that picture, but I am bad at guessing people's age.

Women get more messages of course, because the men are more eager. And when the women get so many messages, they don't need to send messages to new men. So that is why men have to do all the work. But that's normal. Like how the male peacock has to show off his colors to the female. Women hold most of the cards in the beginning of the game.

But I digress. What I wanted to say about online dating is: it's one more venue. It is neither fantastic nor worthless. Yes, there are good experiences. Yes, there are bad experiences. Just like trying to meet someone at the pub, at the gym, at work, or in school. People tend to hold up online dating to much more scrutiny because it's new and different. But like everything else, it is a mixed bag. Anyway, I am glad it exists, because there are many people who work all day and who don't go to college anymore where there are hundreds of girls to meet. Online dating adds to the number of possibilities you have.
 

Captain

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Probably half of them women on those sites won't even read your message/look at your profile, simply because they have so many messages. If they do, they are quick to judge, and you'd have a significantly better chance of success in real life. The majority of men doing online dating are simply too afraid to approach in real life, so they rely on the faceless internet even though it offers far less chance of success. If you don't face your fears you will never get over them.
 

playerone

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This is the lazy man's way to getting women. You should never put high expectations on the Internet. I'm not really much of an "approach" person, but more of an opportunist. I'd approach if i get a decent woman thrown in front of me. Well, if you're feeling bored and want to do some experimenting, there's no harm. I've actually gotten a few numbers online, and dated some of them. I guess you would have more success with the average-looking women this way.
 

PappyS

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Online dating strongly favors women. Not particularly attractive women will get lots of attention that they wouldn't get in real life (on the street, at work, in a bar/club, etc.). A lot of guys probably just do it because it doesn't take a lot of effort.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Frank_Tartaglia

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I've used the internet to get dates and it really isn't that tough, it's a bit of a numbers game though. For every ten e-mails you send out you'll only get a one or two in return.

It's also important to remember that new profiles are shown first in the searches so after about a week or she'll receive fewer e-mails. I've posted a couple of fake female profiles online and found that in the first week the profile got a ton of e-mail, but after that it began to trail off.

Of course you shouldn't let any of this turn you off to using the internet to get dates. Personally I've found more success online than I have found offline.
 

skaterguy97

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I think you all are missing probably the greatest part of this whole idea....it says she is looking for someone who speaks english, and is between 3 ft and 8 ft tall :crackup:
 

Veridin

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Captain said:
The majority of men doing online dating are simply too afraid to approach in real life, so they rely on the faceless internet even though it offers far less chance of success. If you don't face your fears you will never get over them.
LOL Bull. I have done online dating, and I am not afraid to approach women in real life. But I work a lot, and so do my friends, and there isn't always a chance to get out and search for single women to come on to.

Now, I am sure that if you have crappy pics, you don't have much luck online, and so you need to vent. Okay. But don't make stupid generalizations about those of us who don't have the same unluck. These days more people find partners online than through the pub, which I am all for - why would the pub be a better place, more likely to yield a high-quality result? That assumption is stupid. Likewise, to think that the limited supply at the average workplace is better.
 
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