Something is not right!

[Viking25]

Alright..has anyone remembers the movie called “Groundhog day”? When you get stuck in one day and everything is repeating..? This is how my dating life been in the last few months and I start no to like it at all,but can’t really fugure out what to do different.
It goes like this: I meet girl in the club/street/online..get her number very fast and call her within few days just to talk and whatnot.Within first week I get her out to go with me. I never call it a date,we just go for a nice walk in the park and talk and trying to get to know eachother. (At least that’s what I am doing). It almost loks like two friends talking,I do kine and C&F thing as much as I can,but not being too pushy. At the end I just give her a nice long hug. Again..I don’t see it as a date and perhaps I am a bit uptight here,don’t want to force the kiss(what if she doesn’t feel about me like that?)
Anyway,
I think I am confusing women with this,most guys would probably go for a kiss or be more aggressive,but the way I think,I am being DIFFERENT. After this first “get together” thing I usually call them up in few days and ask them if they wanna go on a real date and usually they say yes. Perhaps they see me as a “safe guy” and go on a date with me just for fun,not feeling any romantic feeling towards me? (sometimes that’s how I feel). I never got rejected for a second date ( I wonder why?)
On the second date,I will try to make a move and go for a kiss and such…and sometimes it goes ok but I haven’t gotten laid yet.
What do you guys think? Something is not right here….I met up with 4 girls and no real results besides some “friendly" convos? Any ideas?

 

[Julian]

I am being DIFFERENT

Yeah you are being afc.

 

[Omega]

Originally posted by Julian
Yeah you are being afc.

Haha, that's not AFC it's just taking things slow; a bit too slow.

You have to realize (original poster) that you can't take it THAT slow. Your goal should be to get a kiss on the first date.

 

[KiInCollege]

The kiss is the tool you use to screen these women. If it's too awkward, then you next her. That or your game wasn't good enough during the date - next her and start over.

Call it a date. Make the tone as a date, not friends hanging out. Maybe you're not in that mindset, and you convey that to her, so you go for the weak hug because that's what friends do . You set the tone of the date as two friends hanging out, because you see that as less risky. However, you're gonna have to lay your cards out there if you want a bigger payoff. You're gonna have to admit that you'd like to fcuk this girl, today if possible.

Man, you're gonna need do some self-evaluation. Stop trying to be different (weak) and be a man that goes after what he wants and moves on when a prospect is gone.

 

[Kuen1]

I gotta agree with KiInCollege on this one except that I don't see a problem with just "hanging out" as opposed to calling it a "date." The important thing is that you allow yourself to show that you're sexually attracted to her, and not just a good, great, friendly kinda guy that she views as a puppy dog. "Aww he is so cute, and such a great companion." Personally...I would recommend following some of the basics from the Gunwitch method.
http://sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=46286&highlight=gunwitch+method

And, there is a good little article on the homepage dealing with similar ish.
http://www.sosuave.com/romance/david/art54.htm

 

[Viking25]

Yes I do take things "slow",perhaps that is just my style. I figure if I start playing "DJ"<someone I am not,she will sense that BS and things are not gonna be smooth..lol. I do try to project sexuality as mush as I can,but I do take safe route( don't want to be pushy)
I just don't see how you can go on a real date with someone you don't know..hence I am creating this "hanging out" thing to built some rapport with a girl.
I am trying to be myself here (maybe AFC self?)but that's what works the best from what I've heard.
I guess during this"hanging out" I am trying to figure out if she likes me or do I like her enought to persue her romanticly. Very safe dater here Thanks guys for your comments...keep em comming.

 

[Omni]

You have to make it clear early on if you want to be a woman's friend or her lover; if you don't, she may assume that you just want to be friends. You don't have to do anything extreme to get your point across; you can signal your sexual intentions by doing something as simple as running a hand down her back when you hug her.

 

[Spike_Tha_Cowboy]

Just tell her that you love her and buy her some diamond earrings.

 

[Spike_Tha_Cowboy]

Originally posted by Spike_Tha_Cowboy
Just tell her that you love her and buy her some diamond earrings.

what I said

 

[Crank_It_Up]

have you actually tried to get laid? If you've tried and they've said no, ask them what was the reason, not us.

 

[CLOONEY]

This is not taking things slowly this TOTALLY AFC!! Who the fukc goes for a walk by the lake and "gets to know" eachother on the first date? And then gives them a ummmmmm "BIG LONG HUG", WTF????????

Dude, u gotta take her somewhere fun, get those endorphines pumping by doing some excersise, iceskating is always good because it lets you do kino without having to look like your TRYING!! At the end of the first date, if you like her, KISS HER!!!! Then give her a cheeky smile and say goodbye. This walk around the lake stuff is rediculous, the only person I EVER knew who did this on the first date was one of the biggest chumps I know. Although now he has been with that girl for a few years, haha, sometimes if she likes you, she likes you and it doesnt matter what you do.

BUT, in your case, if you feel you are living in groundhog day, doesnt that tell you something straight away....................??

CHANGE SOMETHING!!! Possibly the idea of the lake walk, haha, u make me laugh dude!! No offence, but you really gotta change this up...........

 

[Viking25]

I was thinking along those lines ie: to be more agressive,stop doing walks in the park sh1t,go for a kiss sooner. BUT:
I am the quiet intellectual type and I don't attract "easy" girls. I end up with 25 y.o virgins for God's sake! And how am I going to get to know woman if we do "action date"? Plus it wouldn't be me,I would have to put on an act and be someone I am not.
I don't take offence....keep em coming guys!!!

 

[CLOONEY]

"And how am I going to get to know woman if we do "action date"?"

BAM, u just said it. You are trying to get to know her profoundly on the first date. She doesnt want an "intellectual" type analysing her. I dont care if shes a 25 year old virgin and smart as hell. She wants to have FUN!! You get to see her FUN side on the first few dates, and she gets to see yours. Then you let her see you have the intellect to match your fun.


"Plus it wouldn't be me,I would have to put on an act and be someone I am not"

Someone you are not? You are THAT intellectual that you NEVER do ANY excersise? You couldnt even TRY to iceskate? It is not being someone you are not, I am not saying you need to become a professional ice skater. Or that you couldnt have deep and meaningful walks down by the lake. But the simple fact is that a girl doesnt want this straight away.

POINT IS: Try to relax, take them out and have fun, dont try to get to know them profoundly on the first date........

 

[Viking25]

Originally posted by CLOONEY
"And how am I going to get to know woman if we do "action date"?"

BAM, u just said it. You are trying to get to know her profoundly on the first date. She doesnt want an "intellectual" type analysing her. I dont care if shes a 25 year old virgin and smart as hell. She wants to have FUN!! You get to see her FUN side on the first few dates, and she gets to see yours. Then you let her see you have the intellect to match your fun.


"Plus it wouldn't be me,I would have to put on an act and be someone I am not"

Someone you are not? You are THAT intellectual that you NEVER do ANY excersise? You couldnt even TRY to iceskate? It is not being someone you are not, I am not saying you need to become a professional ice skater. Or that you couldnt have deep and meaningful walks down by the lake. But the simple fact is that a girl doesnt want this straight away.

POINT IS: Try to relax, take them out and have fun, dont try to get to know them profoundly on the first date........

Awesome ...I see your point CLOONEY...maybe that is what I've been missing. BTW I am super athletic and look that way too. Ok..next first date is gonna be bowling or rollerblading..and if the things go well then invite her for a bite to eat and if things are still well...then my place to chill. Sounds like a plan.
I guess I would have to pay too for all of that .<this part sucks.

 

[CLOONEY]

Originally posted by Viking25
Awesome ...I see your point CLOONEY...maybe that is what I've been missing. BTW I am super athletic and look that way too. Ok..next first date is gonna be bowling or rollerblading..and if the things go well then invite her for a bite to eat and if things are still well...then my place to chill. Sounds like a plan.
I guess I would have to pay too for all of that .<this part sucks.

Yes, now you understand me . Bowling is another great date, then a bite to eat, not to a resteraunt, just a bite to eat somewhere, keep it informal. But I wouldnt recomment askig her back to your place to chill on the first date. You want to just have your fun and leave her wanting more and wondering about you. Its not good to spend too much time together on the first date, remember first impressions are VERY important. At least now you will get away from those long discussions down by the lake , go have fun and show her how u can use that athletic body

Take HER easy champ

 

[Omega]

Originally posted by Viking25
Awesome ...I see your point CLOONEY...maybe that is what I've been missing. BTW I am super athletic and look that way too. Ok..next first date is gonna be bowling or rollerblading..and if the things go well then invite her for a bite to eat and if things are still well...then my place to chill. Sounds like a plan.
I guess I would have to pay too for all of that .<this part sucks.

DO NOT do two things in one date that require a dramatic change. It sounds great but think about it, if your bowling and then go rollerblading, it takes out all the suspense and vice versa. If you do one thing the entire time you can lead up to your kiss close.


That's just my opinion at least.

 

[( . )( . )]

Originally posted by Crank_It_Up
have you actually tried to get laid? If you've tried and they've said no, ask them what was the reason, not us.

wtf

this would be almost as stupid as expecting an honest answer back.

I dont mean to be rude but your 49 mate, this stuff shouldnt need to be explained or even called out especially here on a site aimed at actually giving guys results.

 

[quest]

you gotto do the george costanza and exit the room on a high note.. (when he cracks a good joke in a meeting... gotto love seinfeld)
do that with ur dates.. end them short, don't wait around for her to say, ok i've gotto go..
if ur intellectual, and super athletic.. u should be quite a catch.. why u having so much trouble?
what kind of 26 year old meets a girl at a club, and rather then dancing with her/kissing her/****ing her or seeing her again and ****ing her invites her for a walk around a lake? come on man. i know its been said already, but seriously.. maybe a girl u meet in a libary go for a walk around a lake.. but a girl u meet in a club isn't gonna be a 25 y.o virgin.

 

[xblitz44x]

Again, I'm going to take a different approach. I've gone on first dates and not forced the kiss. If the situation is awkward, and she's not making it any easier on you to kiss her, then it's not the time. And I think it's better to relax, and not put the pressure on yourself about having to jam that kiss in there and just wait until the second date. If you ask most women, they aren't going to write a guy off for not kissing her on the first date.

" On the second date,I will try to make a move and go for a kiss and such…and sometimes it goes ok but I haven’t gotten laid yet."

It doesn't sound like you really have much of a problem, actually. You're getting second dates. That's great. So whats happening after that? Just because you're not having sex after two dates you think you're doing something wrong? I hope that's not what you're saying. Sex will happen when it happens. Try to force it and this is the kind of situation you find yourself it.

"go on a date with me just for fun,not feeling any romantic feeling towards me? (sometimes that’s how I feel). I never got rejected for a second date ( I wonder why?)"

You have no reason to say this. You're getting second dates and these women are kissing you. Why are you assuming that they aren't interested in you? Because they aren't dropping their panties soon enough for you? The time-frame that you expect to get laid is YOUR expectation...not theirs. They have no idea about it. So if they aren't sleeping with you in time to meet your little hidden agenda, that's your issue. Not theirs.

It doesn't sound like you're getting 'just some friendly convo' if they are kissing you. Have you made out with them yet? Have they stopped you from making out with them? Have you been in a situation that would be comfortable for them to sleep with you if they wanted to?

Sounds like you're expecting them to know and adhere with your own internal timeline. And since they aren't, you're getting all bent out of shape about it.

 

[Crank_It_Up]

Originally posted by ( . )( . )
wtf

this would be almost as stupid as expecting an honest answer back.

I dont mean to be rude but your 49 mate, this stuff shouldnt need to be explained or even called out especially here on a site aimed at actually giving guys results.

if you can't have honest coummunication with a girl, then you have a problem, but that would make 2 problems for you, since you already have a set of tits.