So, you've got the girl, now what?

[Supremo]

The majority of threads on this site talk about how to get the girl, but what about afterward?

I know some may say for this to be moved into the high school thread, but I the advice here will hopefully be universal to all ages of Don Juans.

My major sticking point in my current relationship is that it's hard for us to talk on the phone. Granted, we're still in the early stages of the physical side of our relationship, but its been about a month and I find myself struggling to maintain an easy-flowing conversation on the phone after about 15 minutes of talking.

Sure, it's easy enough to talk about random things, but when you're actually in a relationship, it's nice to talk more in depth (deep rapport, for all you DJs).

Any advice? A couple of my "natural" friends have said to either a) talk about the girl, or b) talk about the relationship.

Even with those in mind, it's difficult for me to keep it moving.

Advice? Conversation topics?

 

[KontrollerX]

What to do next?

Read squirrels brilliant thread here.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=134995

It will insure that you won't eventually end up with egg on your face and you'll have a happy relationship as long as you want if you internalize his teachings in this thread.

 

[sav]

maybe she's just not interesting.....

either that or she's finding you not interesting...


when im personally interested in a person, i find that the conversations flow easily... especially if the other person is interested in me.. then it really doesnt matter what you are talking about...

many here will tell you that phone conversations should be used only to setup dates... there is some sense in that if you are in the position that YOU are in.. when the conversations are just not interesting..

 

[DonJuan11]

The majority of threads on this site talk about how to get the girl, but what about afterward?


Sure, it's easy enough to talk about random things, but when you're actually in a relationship, it's nice to talk more in depth (deep rapport, for all you DJs).

Any advice? A couple of my "natural" friends have said to either a) talk about the girl, or b) talk about the relationship.

Even with those in mind, it's difficult for me to keep it moving.

You have to be exciting enough to never have to worry about "what to talk about" with a girl who lets you touch her body.

If you have problems with the conversation, the interest level on her side is dropping fast.

 

[DonRaul]

I had the same issues. The problem is the fact that we have been fed lies!!!

Communication is not about letting her talk about herself all day and you just listen. Yes people love to hear themselves talk but they will not find you entertaining or interesting. This is how you make friends, not intimate relationships. If she is not a natural talker, then its worst because she will just think talking to you is a bore and lose interest fast. One problem most guys make is ask a barrage of question interrogating her because you believe this will get her talking but instead you learn that she gets frustrated and think you are not very creative.

Be talkative, say a bunch of interesting things. Read about human nature or learn more about our psyche. Tell her about things you learn here on Don Juan forums, about how to influencing people. Don't worry about talking too much. That is the biggest mistake I made. I always thought "sh*t I am talking too much". The real problem is when you talk too much about yourself or non interesting things like how computers work or spaceships . Talk about interesting human behavior topics and make her think you are an expert on the subject. She will quickly try to give her own ideas and before you know it you can't get her to stop talking.

 

[Snow Plowman]

My major sticking point in my current relationship is that it's hard for us to talk on the phone.

??? can you talk in person easily? If this is a problem then you haven't actually haven't improved much.

Granted, we're still in the early stages of the physical side of our relationship, but its been about a month

What!? please tell me you've had sex with her already

I find myself struggling to maintain an easy-flowing conversation on the phone after about 15 minutes of talking.

Again you haven't really got far if you still have problems holding conversation

Sure, it's easy enough to talk about random things, but when you're actually in a relationship, it's nice to talk more in depth (deep rapport, for all you DJs).

Just do it, if thats what you want to do

Advice? Conversation topics?

Stop trying to force everything. Also start actually developing a REAL personality, because if you can pickup chicks but then having problems as to what to do after then your actually missing the whole point of learning PICKUP. (And that is...)

Improve your who you are. You got the girl because of who you are so of course you should be exactly who you were when you first met her. Like some people have said.

"Pickup isn't something you do its something you are"

You don't have to do deep rapport, but if that is the type of person you are then by all means do it. How would you do it LEAD, just like you lead the pickup. Talk, go deeper, lead it deeper, lead it deeper.

Relationships aren't really talked about much because it all comes down to the person and what he wants in a relationship and how he wants it to be. All that extends from your personality.