Ringleader41
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 7, 2011
- Messages
- 326
- Reaction score
- 2
I tell my friends this and they act like I'm crazy. I can see that because girls that I used to have crushes on me were all over me.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
this. you'll know when a girl is intersted in you because they wont hide it BUT dont expect to just breeze into a relationship or a bunch of lays.samspade said:Yes and no. It's true that a woman with high IL will show it and make an effort to be with you. However she'll still play little games and throw tests your way. Your job is to recognize and "pass" the tests by flipping the script on her, which will drive the IL higher.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Bingo. Upbringing and classiness has a great deal to do with it. A smart, elegant and compassionate woman who's interested will toy with you a bit as a matter of due diligence, but no more than necessary.bradd80 said:It depends: if a girl is a really good catch and was raised by a good family and has a good head on her shoulders then no, she will not play any games with you.
This part I agree with. Women actually are direct when it comes to expressing their feelings; however, everything else is generally not asked for, but hinted at. For example: my dad would tell me to "take out the trash" directly, whereas my mom would be like "Man, that trash can is getting full... it's starting to smell in here... wow, someone needs to take that out soon..." (translation: take out the trash).Boilermaker said:Women don't talk in our language... Women are more withdrawn, they don't confront each other, they are usually more patient, and they certainly aren't as direct as guys are.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I completely agree with you, and this is what I was trying to say, I lost where your disagreement was.Harry Wilmington said:This is why guys think girls are playing games - 9 times out of 10, it's because the girl is saying one thing about wanting to be with them, while performing actions indicating the opposite. But this isn't game-playing; in girl world, it's her trying not to sound rude while hoping you get the hint via her actions that you should back off. Once you're able to accept this, your eyes will be open and you'll see that "game-playing" doesn't really exist.