Ringleader41
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 7, 2011
- Messages
- 326
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I tell my friends this and they act like I'm crazy. I can see that because girls that I used to have crushes on me were all over me.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
this. you'll know when a girl is intersted in you because they wont hide it BUT dont expect to just breeze into a relationship or a bunch of lays.samspade said:Yes and no. It's true that a woman with high IL will show it and make an effort to be with you. However she'll still play little games and throw tests your way. Your job is to recognize and "pass" the tests by flipping the script on her, which will drive the IL higher.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Bingo. Upbringing and classiness has a great deal to do with it. A smart, elegant and compassionate woman who's interested will toy with you a bit as a matter of due diligence, but no more than necessary.bradd80 said:It depends: if a girl is a really good catch and was raised by a good family and has a good head on her shoulders then no, she will not play any games with you.
This part I agree with. Women actually are direct when it comes to expressing their feelings; however, everything else is generally not asked for, but hinted at. For example: my dad would tell me to "take out the trash" directly, whereas my mom would be like "Man, that trash can is getting full... it's starting to smell in here... wow, someone needs to take that out soon..." (translation: take out the trash).Boilermaker said:Women don't talk in our language... Women are more withdrawn, they don't confront each other, they are usually more patient, and they certainly aren't as direct as guys are.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I completely agree with you, and this is what I was trying to say, I lost where your disagreement was.Harry Wilmington said:This is why guys think girls are playing games - 9 times out of 10, it's because the girl is saying one thing about wanting to be with them, while performing actions indicating the opposite. But this isn't game-playing; in girl world, it's her trying not to sound rude while hoping you get the hint via her actions that you should back off. Once you're able to accept this, your eyes will be open and you'll see that "game-playing" doesn't really exist.