So, I found a metal fork in my bottle of ketchup

protienpowder

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How do I sue?
 

Phyzzle

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First, throw away the rest of your silverware so that investigators don't notice that the fork happens to be identical to the fork that's missing from your set . . .
 

Dilberto

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Call a Personal Injury attorney. Most will offer you a free, one-hour consultation, just to see if you even HAVE A CASE.
 

STR8UP

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Were you injured?

No? Then the first thing you should do is shove the fork up your ass sideways.

You deserve some pain for being such a greedy SOB.

Go work for your money.

Dumbass
 

Dilberto

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STR8UP said:
Were you injured?

No? Then the first thing you should do is shove the fork up your ass sideways.

You deserve some pain for being such a greedy SOB.

Go work for your money.

Dumbass
HAHAHAHAAA......easy there, str8t!

When I was a waiter this one lady used to order a salad, eat most of it and say she found a half ****roach inside her salad. We would obviously comp her meal. She did this two other times. One day I noticed her pouring something out of her perscription pill case, and she called over the restaurant manager again. This time I informed him of what she did. When she asked what happened to the ****roach's other half.....the manager calmly said, "you obviously ATE IT......now please don't ever come back".
 

STR8UP

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You probably won't believe me when I tell you this, but TWICE, at TWO DIFFERENT restaurants, I found a DRYWALL SCREW in my food.

The first time was a long time ago. I was eating the most amazing Caesar salad at my buddy's parents restaurant. I bit down on something hard, and pulled a very sharp screw out of my mouth. I put it to the side and finished the delicious salad.

Second time was a few months ago. I was eating at a steakhouse. Got a big spoonful of mashed potatoes, and whaddya know? Another drywall screw.

Needless to say I ate free that night. I wasn't injured so it wasn't a big deal to me.

My business partner just got t-boned by a car running a red light a few months ago. Fractured his neck and put him out of work and in a neck brace for several months. He still doesn't know whether he will have to go through surgery or not.

THAT'S something you sue over.
 

Phyzzle

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Plus, I mean, come on. It's completely obvious that you put the fork there yourself and then "IM GONNA SUE WHERES MY CHECK". Like that woman who found a finger in the Wendy's chilli. Everybody freaked out and stopped going to Wendy's, although the very first news story mentioned that the finger wasn't cooked. So all the meat and beans around it were cooked, but the finger was fine. (She forgot to cook the finger before dropping it in.)

Think, you dumass, there aren't any forks on the assembly line at a bottling factory, and any forks with the tomatoes would have been smashed by the puree machinery.
 

Mr. Wolf

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protienpowder said:
How do I sue?

Don't sue, you have no case.. Most you can get is refund for your bottle of ketchup..

I hope the fork is still inside..

Put the item on eBay and sell it. I can give you tips on how to photograph it. I'm not sh1tting you man, like the other fools, you might make some money of this if you sell it.
 

protienpowder

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I can't even get the fork out of the bottle, the fork end is bigger than the neck of the bottle.
 

penkitten

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my mother is a nurse and says that people find out all the time that they have something wrong with them after a surgery and come to find out, some surgeon left gauze or a scalpel or something like that inside them and never noticed and closed them up. they later develop complications, infections, pain, and sometimes even death before they find out what was left inside their organs.
 

Potbelly

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ok I don't care if you sue or not:

Here's how: get a damn lawyer to review your case. He says good, you work with him and sue. He says no, then sell on ebay.
 

Mr.Positive

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You can't sue..sue for what?

This reminds me of when I started my first job at mcdonalds when I was 16. I walked in and saw a coworker p!ssing in the vat of pickles. I quit. I'll never eat at mcdonalds again, haven't since. Should I have sued?

People sue over the dumbest sh!t...
 

Play the Game

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Just get a lawyer to scare the **** out of heinz, tell em you're considering going public with this.
Picture big smear campaign all over nightline news: Are our ketchup supplies safe? Do you know which ketchup is safe for your family?

When they give you an offer give them back their fork bottle. Unless the big tv networks give you more money, then you can start a bidding war.

Ohh and don't settle for free ketchup for life. lol
 

protienpowder

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Chaos-Knight said:
Please post a picture!

...sounds like an inside joke from the ketsup factory,probably
some worker there put it in as a joke.
The fork won't even come out of the bottle, the fork end is bigger than the neck of the bottle. How did this happen?
 

Bonez

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We'll give you the low down AFTER you post the damned picture!

Man, you could probably exchange the fork in a bottle for a brand new camera.

P.S. You wanted to know HOW you could sue, right? Well thats easy, you have to get hurt or sick or scared or something that a judge isn't going to just laugh at.

So what you do is go out there and catch yourself a disease, hang out in hospitals and ask people to cough in your face. Eat some two week old moldy food from a trash can. Lick your dogs paws. have people in your school spit in a cup then you swallow it.

THEN you can sue.

stylesbjj, nice change of name.
 

artalexakis

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g g g unit said:
http://abcnews.go.com/US/comments?type=story&id=2863268

This guy should have been given the death penalty for "trying to sue".

Friggin' weirdo.

Btw on your case you probably won't get anything i once found a piece of plastic from the coke machine at disneyland and the guy who served me couldn't speak english.

that article is jacked up. theres so many sick people in the world.:cuss:


but dude i have no idea who you would talk to.
 

God_of_getting_layed

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STR8UP said:
You probably won't believe me when I tell you this, but TWICE, at TWO DIFFERENT restaurants, I found a DRYWALL SCREW in my food.
D!ck Ramsey and Bonhomme would like to have you beleive that a coincidence is not how you would explain these 2 events, but rather that some kind of magical powers that defy science must be involved.

coincidences do happen, and then we have people who make up bull**** :rolleyes:
 

Desdinova

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Have you checked the label for a "Free Fork Inside" promo? :p

If there isn't one, then congratulations! You've won a free fork! Might come in handy for the next time you have that extra guest at dinner.

BTW, if you want to get the fork out, finish the ketchup and then cut the bottle open. The fork isn't going to poison the ketchup, so enjoy!

edit: Better yet, clean the bottle with the fork stuck inside and use it for a conversation piece.
 
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