So just to bring you guys up to speed. I was/am interested in this girl from work and from the signals I was getting she was interested in me. So today on MSN I asked her for her cell after a brief chat and she didn't reply back for a bit then went 'busy' and then just offline. Now i don't know what happened to prompt this but I don't gotta a good feeling about this lol. I see her on Thursday at work. How do i act?? Like nothing happened..I still do like her but I don't know what the hell happened. My main question is how do i handle this situation...?? I usually talk to her at work but it is minimal. Also i usually leave the workplace with her ..we walk to our bus stops (different stops). So should i just not bother on thursday cuz I really don't know what i should do now
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
so here's a fun one..
- Thread starter ashrivas
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Gangster Of Love
Master Don Juan
Just pretend nothing happened. That is the only thing you can do for now, until you get a feel of how she felt about that. Don't ask her, don't react, just go about the normal things you usually do, even your interactions with her.
If she's not interested, she will no longer be giving you those "signals" she was before. If she keeps giving you the "singnals", then you ask her in person.
If she's not interested, she will no longer be giving you those "signals" she was before. If she keeps giving you the "singnals", then you ask her in person.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Igetit!
Moderator
I assume this is the same girl you spoke about in this thread of yours.ashrivas said:
In that thread.,Slaog suggested you tell her you had plans to go somewhere and invite her to come along,and I said that whatever you do,to do it in person.
Were these ideas not good enough?
Asking for her number over the internet was a bad idea.
It makes you look scared/afraid because you (like you said) you've known her for a month,and had plenty of opportunities to ask her out in person,but didn't do it.
It was like you had to wait until you were behind a computer screen before you had enough courage to "man up" and ask for her number.
This would be ok if you two had met over the internet,but to ask for the number online after being around her for a month in person...not good.
808
Don Juan
I get the idea she DID bring it up herself and said it was weird.
I'd personally laugh it off, and move on.
I'd personally laugh it off, and move on.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Yes it's the same girl. I misinterpreted it. I thought the number I could get on MSN but when I ask her to chill I should do that in person. So damage done eh. What would be YOUR advice to me going forward. This time I'll make sure that I understand it and learn from this.Igetit! said:
Also, I am guessing all chances with this particular one are lost?
Gangster Of Love
Master Don Juan
If she brings it up, I seriously doubt she will, let her express herself and explain what exactly was weird about it. If it is obvious she doesn't like you, then just acknowledge it and walk away.ashrivas said:
I've read your other posts here in the forum, and by FAR the best advice I can give you is read all posts, books, DJ bible, that are available here.
Resorting to the forum only after some kind of damage has been done, is bound to fail and let you dissapointed for a long-time.
If you walk to the bus stop with her regularly, obviously it is very weird to ask her over IM for her number. This shouldn't even been a question.
By some of your posts it's clear that your getting in trouble by not really try to understand how things work.
She went busy before going offline, so she has an excuse to give you. Push the issue to hard, and you'll lose any chances you might have...
It's like hunting. You need to load the weapon before you see the target, or else it will always be a fruitless endeavor...
Resorting to the forum only after some kind of damage has been done, is bound to fail and let you dissapointed for a long-time.
If you walk to the bus stop with her regularly, obviously it is very weird to ask her over IM for her number. This shouldn't even been a question.
By some of your posts it's clear that your getting in trouble by not really try to understand how things work.
She went busy before going offline, so she has an excuse to give you. Push the issue to hard, and you'll lose any chances you might have...
It's like hunting. You need to load the weapon before you see the target, or else it will always be a fruitless endeavor...