mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Agree after further thought that its playing with fire.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
So after no contact and your meeting the exgf for the first time...need advise
- Thread starter Shortstreet
- Start date
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Bingo. That discussion opened you up so she could reinsert control.
lamath
Master Don Juan
Well done... she did not get what she wanted out of this.
She wanted to know that you were still there for her, did not get the anwser she wanted.
That just made her hamster spin.....i predict that she will contact you again soon enought
bcude
Master Don Juan
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Don't understand. She broke up with you because she became jealous one night and you had a big fight over it. So what was her reason for the breakup?
Sounds more like you had an argument, not that feelings disappeared or anything.
If it ended over that it was a very fragile relationship from the start tbh.
OP this^ read it 50 times, everything to do with women is need for chaos drama or validation, SHE DOESNT LIKE YOU(so to speak)
if she did, she would say "Hey im so sorry i behaved the way i did, losing you is the worst thing that happened to me", (and you would make out).....
I had an ex come back after 4 YEARS!!!! i actually gave her the benefit of the doubt,thought we could hang out , thought she might have grown up
NO she ghosted me as soon as she took a sniff id still hit it, i fortunately expected it , so my mind was protected
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
What would you do if you DID want to hit it.?
do
do you mean how would i approach? Telling one ex i was happy to just be friends worked a treat a few years back, it sent her insane and right round my house
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Ok. So you had an interaction which kept her on the hook? Did yoy string her along with may be and possibly?
I don't understand why some men even be bothered with NC but then initiates contact later on...
If its a technique to get women to comply then that's pretty feminine.
You all do know this is what women does when trying to get their men to be more supplicating.
If its a technique to get women to comply then that's pretty feminine.
You all do know this is what women does when trying to get their men to be more supplicating.
Rawksteddy
Don Juan
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What do you think happens if the guy acts like a belligerent *******??
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Rawksteddy
Don Juan
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I think it’s feminine if the guy initiated contact. But if the woman initiated the contact then it’s meh. Because it’s not masculine to chase and be a big afc right?
You mean in this exact situation OP is in?
Been there where an ex wants to reconnect years down the road and see if they can use you for validation or a quick fix. It happens all the time. When chicks get dumped if they themselves didnt monkey branch to the next guy it leaves them disoriented and they always look back to previous relationships. They always do. It is how you know they have been recently dumped, they suddenly reach out, out of the blue. They are looking for quick validation.
If you live by the rule of giving them one chance per life time you remove all chance of them doing this to you. Whether it be one week one month one year even 4 years later. One chance. When they blow it they are out for good.
Once a man has dismissed a woman, she no longer exists in his domain.
There is nothing else to talk abt, figure abt, negotiate abt except for moving on.
Exactly.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Rawksteddy
Don Juan
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Yes
It really just depends on the woman, and the circumstances. In cases where the woman did you wrong, it would actually help you to be a jerk towards her after NC vs welcoming her back with open arms. In cases where YOU are the one who did wrong, it wouldn't really help
It's hard for me to say if it would help in OP exact situation, because it's really a he said she said kind of situation. His girl claims he was all over some other chick, but she could have just been drunk and making a big deal about nothing. Only OP knows the truth. If he indeed did nothing seriously wrong, then he could definitely get away with being a jerk to her when she comes back around, because she would know she was wrong, and she's the one who needs to make things right