"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Sleeping with a Partner Issues

logicallefty

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GF and I have lived together for 1.5 years. She has been sleeping in the spare bedroom for 3 nights because she has been nasty sick.

I have came to the 100% conclusion with no shadow of a doubt that I sleep way better alone. She tosses and turns in the night so much. Gets up about 5 times in the night to check her FB, not kidding. She crosses the bed like a clock hand and hits all 12 numbers at some point, and I have to bend by body around her to get out of her way.

These last few nights I have slept so deep and feel so rested. I don't even feel like the same person. I actually had what I think they call a dream. Is that what its called when you sleep deep and then things go on in your head that are like watching a video? I think they call those dreams. It's been so long sense i had one.

Normally I get tired and very often will sleep my hour lunch break away at work on the floor in my office, or nap an hour or two on Saturday.

People, including the GF always say "you could afford to loose a few pounds" (which I could), or "your job is too stressful on you you need to get another one" (which it is, and I do, and am working on it). I do not lift much anymore but I do run several times a week.

The point is though, when I sleep by myself and get the rest I need, I feel like a totally different person.

I'm just dreading when she gets well and wants to sleep together again. I don't want to go back to being that tired, but I just don't know what to do. :confused:
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Create Reality

Master Don Juan
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Bigger bed is a good idea. And on top of that, a comfort foam topper, so she won't shake the bed when she does get up and out. Maybe even seperate blankets! Best of luck man.
 

MtnMan

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checking FB in the middle of the night?
WTF is that, I would need to put a stop to that.
 

Colossus

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I have the same issue. My gf is a flip-flopper and she jerks her whole body at random intervals. AND, she cocoons herself in all the covers so she gets SUPER hot, which in turn makes me hot and wakes me up.

The solution I've decided is a king or California king-sized bed (I have a full). And probably separate comforters.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Who Dares Win

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Same here, cant sleep 8 hours in a row with her, we fall asleep in decent place then after few minutes she starts chasing me pushing and pushing till I either have to stand up and circle around the bed till the other side or wake her up asking "for some space".

Then it starts the hot and cold season with her doing the cocoon Colossus talked about only to have her taking away all the sheets and leave me cold.
 

rugby11

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Have you tried warm tea without with lemon? I try writing in a journal about things like this that happen to me.
 

ChrisFloyd

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rugby11 said:
Have you tried warm tea without with lemon? I try writing in a journal about things like this that happen to me.
No man, iced tea with lemon is the best, especially in the summer.
 

EFFORT

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All great suggestions here a few more ideas.

1. Make sure the room is pitch black, use black out curtains to block any light and/or wear a sleep mask.

2. Take 2-3 Tryptophan pills 2 hours before bed or have your gf take them.
 

Mickey254155

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EFFORT said:
All great suggestions here a few more ideas.

1. Make sure the room is pitch black, use black out curtains to block any light and/or wear a sleep mask.

2. Take 2-3 Tryptophan pills 2 hours before bed or have your gf take them.
this is the good idea
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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