"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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sleep question

Lt dan

Master Don Juan
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ok is it better to have a steady sleep schedule or alot of sleep. like say one night you get 6 hours of sleep. should you try to get to sleep alot earlier the next night or try to get about the same amount. what is the best sleep schedule for the most energy
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Sleepless

Don Juan
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It's better to maintain a schedule of sleep rather than get more sleep. It has to do with something called your circadian rythm. I remember reading about it, and I think it's because your body is able to fall asleep better and wake up at the expected time.
 

Lt dan

Master Don Juan
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hey did anybody else think it was weird that a guy that answer my sleep question was named sleepless?
 
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