Single mommy: Guy is 40 - to think that you're going to date women who don't already have children, who have never been married, is absolutely absurd

[MatureDJ]

I don't have a problem with a childless divorcée, but I think a single mommy is undateable, at least until I have children, and her children are over 18.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I don't have a problem with a childless divorcée, but I think a single mommy is undateable, at least until I have children, and her children are over 18.

Not a problem for me.

 

[The Duke]

I don't have a problem with a childless divorcée, but I think a single mommy is undateable, at least until I have children, and her children are over 18.

Have you ever dated a single mom? What's your issue with her having kids ? Just curious.

I've dated all types. I have noticed single moms are more caring and not as self absorbed, and many times more feminine.

 

[DJ Novice]

When you get to my age (58) most women around that age (within 10 years) usually have children.

As long as the children are of university age dating can work. It’s best for privacy if at least one of you lives alone. Banging when kids are in neighbouring bedrooms can be a bit confronting for some people. Better still if the kids no longer live at home.

Women with children younger than university age should be for recreational use only unless you want to become a pseudo step dad and/or have her kid tag along on dates.

 

[Westminster]

Have you ever dated a single mom? What's your issue with her having kids ? Just curious.

I've dated all types. I have noticed single moms are more caring and not as self absorbed, and many times more feminine.

I think that's often true.

There are, however, big downsides as well. On one hand, her kids are always going to come first, you're not going to be her priority. But then there's the practicalities. You can't just do what you want, when you want. The logistics are going to be complicated. Then, of course, there is the ex to consider.

Leaving that aside, it's going to get expensive if it gets serious because you're going to have to pay for all sorts of things and those kids (somebody else's kids) are going to absorb a lot of your time, energy and effort. So, all in all, is the juice worth the squeeze?

 

[Gamisch]

I think that's often true.

There are, however, big downsides as well. On one hand, her kids are always going to come first, you're not going to be her priority. But then there's the practicalities. You can't just do what you want, when you want. The logistics are going to be complicated. Then, of course, there is the ex to consider.

Leaving that aside, it's going to get expensive if it gets serious because you're going to have to pay for all sorts of things and those kids (somebody else's kids) are going to absorb a lot of your time, energy and effort. So, all in all, is the juice worth the squeeze?

To put it bluntly: if a man is single and would " pay for play" he'd lose approx 200 bucks per week. Maybe per 2 weeks.

Or he has to go out and spend it there. Third option is he will have to serial date and a date also costs around 100 per pop and might end in a friendly handshake and a dey dieck.

Women ALWAYS cost money pne way or another!

 

[Doctor Europeo]

"The guy is 40 years old, to think that you're going to date women who don't already have children, who have never been married, is absolutely absurd"

This is just female Cope. I did my best in my mid 30s. Location is probably a factor, though.

 

[jhonny9546]

I think that's often true.



There are, however, big downsides as well. On one hand, her kids are always going to come first, you're not going to be her priority. But then there's the practicalities. You can't just do what you want, when you want. The logistics are going to be complicated. Then, of course, there is the ex to consider.



Leaving that aside, it's going to get expensive if it gets serious because you're going to have to pay for all sorts of things and those kids (somebody else's kids) are going to absorb a lot of your time, energy and effort. So, all in all, is the juice worth the squeeze?

This is simply what you will have as you grow older.

Women carry baggage: the first is their children, the second is their ex, the third is their emotional damage.

A woman without children will still have everything else.

I've also noticed that women with children, mothers in general, are more "grown-up" and have more attractive manners.

 

[Ricky]

I understand the thinking of women on this, as previously there were a higher percentage of women with children but now we are rotating in into a group of women (millenials and younger) that are increasingly childless.

 

[Slowhandluke]

Have you ever dated a single mom? What's your issue with her having kids ? Just curious.

I never dated a single mom. But I did marry a women who became a single mom. Would I like to date that type of person again? Not if I can avoid it. No issues with the kid. I actually really fond of him.

Live and learn. thats what I always say.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

"The guy is 40 years old, to think that you're going to date women who don't already have children, who have never been married, is absolutely absurd"

This is just female Cope. I did my best in my mid 30s. Location is probably a factor, though.

The issue then becomes that one of the biggest red flags a woman can have after her mid 30s is to not have children.

It speaks to something being off with her on a fundamental level, IMO. Unless there is a good reason or she can't have kids, these women are mostly walking red flags.

 

[pipeman84]

The issue then becomes that one of the biggest red flags a woman can have after her mid 30s is to not have children.

It speaks to something being off with her on a fundamental level, IMO. Unless there is a good reason or she can't have kids, these women are mostly walking red flags.

And being a single mom doesn't indicate there's something wrong with her on a fundamental level?
What it says to me is that she either picked a total loser/violent man to be the father and/or she is so terrible that an average guy can't live with her.

 

[Gamisch]

And being a single mom doesn't indicate there's something wrong with her on a fundamental level?
What it says to me is that she either picked a total loser/violent man to be the father and/or she is so terrible that an average guy can't live with her.

Soo...

Perhaps we can conclude that it's a lose / lose either way??

After 30 , your best option might be a woman who somehow got out of a teenage LTR that lasted for more than a decade

Or a woman who studied hard and is about to become a doctor-ish type or higher.

Anything else...is a red flag regardless..

 

[Divorced w 3]

The issue then becomes that one of the biggest red flags a woman can have after her mid 30s is to not have children.

It speaks to something being off with her on a fundamental level, IMO. Unless there is a good reason or she can't have kids, these women are mostly walking red flags.

I just dealt with one a few days ago. This 35 year old woman whom i went out with years ago saw me look her up on LinkedIn. I was going to refer someone to her. The following morning I get the first text from her I’ve seen in years. She’s bananas. We were supposed to meet for professional drinks and she started texting me sexually. So I say, screw it let’s just ask her to skip the drinks, go to her place and order in. Then she tells me she’s not that type of girl. She then tells me she’s relationship material. I remind her that when we originally met it was the fact I had children she couldn’t get past and she attempts to gaslight me. I used to be so tangled up in this woman four years ago - I ended up cancelling nicely. She’s a nut.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Soo...

Perhaps we can conclude that it's a lose / lose either way??

After 30 , your best option might be a woman who somehow got out of a teenage LTR that lasted for more than a decade

Or a woman who studied hard and is about to become a doctor-ish type or higher.

Anything else...is a red flag regardless..

Same could be said about a man fishing for that unicorn in her 20’s older than her by a decade but believes he’s entitled to traditional marriage.

 

[Gamisch]

Same could be said about a man fishing for that unicorn in her 20’s older than her by a decade but believes he’s entitled to traditional marriage.

This will spark some reaction lol.

10 years can be doable? But I get your point. I'd rather say same can be said for a LOSER who solely has women as his triumph in life while he gets older and keep fading...

 

[BackInTheGame78]

And being a single mom doesn't indicate there's something wrong with her on a fundamental level?
What it says to me is that she either picked a total loser/violent man to be the father and/or she is so terrible that an average guy can't live with her.

Maybe, maybe not.

That's where screening comes in.

It's the difference between trying to screen between dry, semi-sweet and sweet wines versus trying to screen for the ability to change beer into wine. One thing is possible, the other is not.

 

[BadBoy89]

I don't know why Hollywood doesn't cast single mothers in male "love interest" roles.

You know, if Taylor Swift was a single mom, if Selena Gomez was a single mom, if Sydney Sweeney was single, if Margot Robbie was a single mom, if Oliva Dunne was a single mom, I think men would have no issue with them.

But for some reason, the entertainment industry doesn't cast them. Not sure why. I mean, they are grown up, attractive, and more feminine, right?

 

[corrector]

I don't have a problem with a childless divorcée, but I think a single mommy is undateable, at least until I have children, and her children are over 18.

I think it depends on the person and what you’re looking for. Some people are fine dating someone with kids, others aren’t — it’s more about compatibility than a hard rule.

 

[Manure Spherian]

I don't have a problem with a childless divorcée, but I think a single mommy is undateable, at least until I have children, and her children are over 18.

If you’re just going to “date” (screw) then why not?