Shyt test versus blow off: how can we tell?

[Austin Allegro]

Following on from my previous post, this is a constant problem I'm having.

We're told if a woman likes us, she'll make it easy to get a date. I have little trouble setting up first dates that go well. But that's as far as it seems to get.

When I ask them out again, I get something along the lines of 'I'm not sure if I'm free' 'I'll call you' ' sitting at home watching paint dry is less boring than going out with you' etc.

Now I'm not talking about blatant, obvious blow offs where no alternative dates are suggested - I realise that's a nexting offence.

What I mean are confusing responses where you're not sure if you should put your foot down and not take her shyt.

Stuff like 'I'm not sure, it's a busy weekend, give me a call nearer the time'.

I tend to play it cool, because I don't want to appear so desperate that I need to force her into a date, but when I put the phone down I keep wondering 'maybe I should have called her out on this shyt'.

Has anyone any experience of putting their foot down on these shyt tests and succeeding in getting the girl, or is it more likely to just p*ss them off further if you corner them?

Examples would be good.

 

[Austin Allegro]

BTW the 'watching paint dry' one was a joke.

Although I have heard 'I prefer to work late rather than go out on dates'.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

For a girl, these are' blatant obvoius blowoffs', men just don't see it like that because we want what we see no matter if it is for the taking or not, so we cling on to hope!

If a girl is intereste she would set up an alternative time to see you - if she doesn't after you made 2 attempts - then get out of her presence!

Don't force yourself on a girl, it is annoying to her and you look desperate!

 

[Mazman]

.

I honestly don't waste my time with a woman who gives me the "maybe", "I'll have to see", etc.. lines. Rarely will I ask a second time to see if this was some dumb test. If it was, oh well. I don't want to be with someone who does this crap anyway.

 

[Austin Allegro]

My thoughts too, PRL, but we're often told we should be more in control with women and more authoritative, and that women 'test' us by seeing if we will do this, even if they like us.

For example, I have heard a woman say she will flake on a date just to see if the guy likes her enough to reschedule.

My instinct is to be cool and detached and not 'chase' or 'put my foot down' .

What I am saying is, are there instances where women WANT us to be more forceful and not put up with their shyt, or should we just play it cool and move on to the next girl? Do women ALWAYS make it easy for us to date them if they like us? I'm not so sure.

 

[Kineti[C]harm]

You better start working on your date game... I've NEVER EVER gotten ANY flaking (Only time I did get any flaking was one girl that was at the end with her BF, 1 week later I was at her place for a movie...) ... Whenever I've had a date I've gotten msgs/phones right afterwards with sweet messages on how good it was etc and I've gotten second dates without problems.

So you are probably doing somethign WRONG on your first-dates... You need to work on this, make the dates more fun, more attractive. You are obviously NOT ticking their hornyness scale...

 

[icehot]

Austin A.

I've had a couple of these and my response is always to play it cool. If there's no counter-offer, i just say something like:

"Give me buzz when you're free and i'll see if I can work you into my schedule."

-iceH

 

[Austin Allegro]

Ice, thanks - I think this is the best way, as it turns the tables on her and shows that it's her that has to fit into your schedule - not the other way round.

Kineticcharm, thanks also - but the women seem to enjoy themselves on my dates and often text saying so afterwards. I would agree with you if they sat there looking bored, but they don't. Either they are having a bad time and are good at hiding it, or they're just natural flakes - I don't think my game is the problem.

 

[Nightspark]

thing is... dont care about it... really shyt tests im my experiance basically the only way to pass them is to just ignore them for a little while... u should pass... if not then it's time for the NEXT!


right now i'm on one... damn girl just gave me her number on the net and now she wants me to call her.... jeez... and it's 1AM too!