should i want a relationship with her?

[ticaaa]

Hello guys im new here , this one will be a long one but i really need your help I met this girl at work she is 20 years old im 27 and i really like her so i asked her if she has a boyfriend and she said yes but they dont get along anymore and they might break up , he has been working in another town for about 6 months and has to keep working there for another 6 months-1 year until he comes home for good .

She started talking to another coworker about 2-3 months ago he lives near her and they go home toghether they eat toghether and i asked if there is something between them and she said no they just hang out because she feels lonely

Anyway we started talking she started sending me pictures of her ( normal ones not naked or half naked ) and she used to tell me what she was doing at every minute and after 1 week she invited me one night to stay in her car and talk at about 10 PM . We talked for about 4 hours about more personal stuff she said that her boyfriend treats her bad and he is very jealous . After that night i went at her place 2 times . 2nd time i went we watched a movie we cuddled for hours and she started a tickle fight that ended up he getting on top of me , i started massaging her back from under her shirt i asked her if she wants me to stop and she said keep going , i grabbed her ass from under her panties and she quickly took my hand away and then i asked if she doesnt want me to go down there and she said NO .

What was weird was that when i was at her place she was talking to this other coworker through text and i saw a little she asked him "do i have to be at your disposal 24/7 ? " and he said yes , she started ignoring his texts and he started calling her , she rejected his first 2 calls and at the third i told her to go answer because he is starting to be annoying . She went to the bathroom to talk to him . When she came back i asked her wtf was that and if there is something going on between them and she said "dont worry we just talk alot but there nothing going on its just that im alone and i feel the need to talk "

When i left her place 10 minutes later she texted me and said that she is sorry for what happened and want to act like it never happened and i said yeah sure no problem . I asked if she wanted sex because it was weird that she got on top of me all of a sudden and yet she took my hand away when i wanted to go bellow the waist . She said no the massage was enough

Next day she found out at i asked a friend at work about her and she got upset and said that she doesnt wanna talk to me anymore and started hanging out with this other coworker again . Yet after 2 days she started texting me again sending me pictures of her and i asked why does she keep sending me pictures of her she said "why not ? " and i asked for distance . We stopped talking for 2 months and now we talked again i asked if she is still with her boyfriend and she sayd "yeah " yet i heard rumours that she broken up with her boyfriend and started having a relationship with the other coworker and she said its not true and that people just talk

She sent me pictures of her again and i said that she is beautiful and i would say more about her but i might cross the line and she said "go ahead "and i told her she has nice legs ass and breasts and i would have loved to grab them that night its too bad she took my hand away . She said that she wants to go to the gym and i asked if she wants to go with me and she said yes but she changed her mind .

Another weird thing that happened was that the other coworker liked her latest photo on facebook with heart and after he changed to a normal like , i guess her boyfriend saw and got upset or something . He sayd to a friend of mine that she is no longer with her boyfriend yet she told me that she still is

I really like this girl i want a serious relationship with her i dont just want sex but i dont know what to do . All my friends say she is a cheater and that she will go cuddle with other guys if we were in a relationship

What do u guys think ? Thank you for your time i know its a long post but i really need help

 

[wifehunter]

Take a step back, truth usually reveals itself in time.

 

[fanatic22]

Sounds like you have a powerful case of oneitis with a cheating attention wh0re slvt that has already rebuffed your advances several times. And she's your coworker? Never talk to this girl again except on a purely professional level.

 

[ticaaa]

Sounds like you have a powerful case of oneitis with a cheating attention wh0re slvt that has already rebuffed your advances several times. And she's your coworker? Never talk to this girl again except on a purely professional level.

its so hard
i feel so empty without her , i dont understand why did she got on top of me like that
its funny because while i was massaging her back and kissing her neck i asked if i should stop and she said " if i dont say anything why are u asking me , dont stop " )

 

[fanatic22]

its so hard
i feel so empty without her , i dont understand why did she got on top of me like that
its funny because while i was massaging her back and kissing her neck i asked if i should stop and she said " if i dont say anything why are u asking me , dont stop " )

You should never use a woman as a means to fulfill you. If you "feel empty" by not having a woman you haven't even dated it demonstrates an emotional instability that you need to fix. Focus on yourself, date other women, forget about this slvt forever.

 

[Roober]

its so hard
i feel so empty without her , i dont understand why did she got on top of me like that
its funny because while i was massaging her back and kissing her neck i asked if i should stop and she said " if i dont say anything why are u asking me , dont stop " )

The bolded is cringeworthy! You don't ever ask. You act, and she stops you or reciprocates. Sounds like you had your chance and you blew it. She got caught up in the moment and you got stuck in your head. Think with your d1ck next time.

Quick nuggets..
-Her words mean nothing, judge by her physical actions
-Texts and pics mean nothing, those are not actions
-Listen to your gut!

 

[ticaaa]

You should never use a woman as a means to fulfill you. If you "feel empty" by not having a woman you haven't even dated it demonstrates an emotional instability that you need to fix. Focus on yourself, date other women, forget about this slvt forever.

its not that i wanna use her to fulfill myself its just that when i see her smile its makes me feel amazing just her smile
even when we were in the bed cuddling for hours we were playing with our hands and she was smiling and i was happy because she was happy and she wasnt feeling upset anymore and she wasnt crying

 

[ticaaa]

The bolded is cringeworthy! You don't ever ask. You act, and she stops you or reciprocates. Sounds like you had your chance and you blew it. She got caught up in the moment and you got stuck in your head. Think with your d1ck next time.

Quick nuggets..
-Her words mean nothing, judge by her physical actions
-Texts and pics mean nothing, those are not actions
-Listen to your gut!

i didnt blew it because the massage kept going after that for about 10-15 minutes and after that i tried to grap her ass from under her panties and she took my hand away and said no , i tried kissing her and she didnt respond. And after i asked her "why didnt u let me go further " and she said "the massage was enough "
A woman that wants sex and that gets on top doesnt just stand there to be massaged she kisses you she is taking her clothes off at least thats how it happened everytime when i was in this situation

 

[lizardking82]

1) You don't ask if you wanna go down there. You don't ask about anything. You try to do it and if she refuses you once or twice, you pack up and leave the place.

2) You NEVER ask a woman if she wanted sex. She invited you to hang out at her place. Sex was one of the main things in her mind. How she played it and how bad you played it is a different topic for a different day, but sex was on the plate. Don't ask these questions again.

3) You asked for distance? LOL

4) This story is a mess, as are you probably. Hang around the forum, rather than posting, just read and observe, you have a lot to learn about living in general.

 

[ticaaa]

1) You don't ask if you wanna go down there. You don't ask about anything. You try to do it and if she refuses you once or twice, you pack up and leave the place.

2) You NEVER ask a woman if she wanted sex. She invited you to hang out at her place. Sex was one of the main things in her mind. How she played it and how bad you played it is a different topic for a different day, but sex was on the plate. Don't ask these questions again.

3) You asked for distance? LOL

4) This story is a mess, as are you probably. Hang around the forum, rather than posting, just read and observe, you have a lot to learn about living in general.

i didnt ask if i should go down there
i tried to go down there twice and she took my hand away twice and she said NO so sex wasnt on the plate
im thinking she just wanted some company because she was lonely especialy because it was the hollidays

 

[lizardking82]

Yes, and that is the moment you leave the place. When she invites you at her place and sex isn't on the table, you leave. Not because you're bitter, but because you don't have time to waste with a girl who doesn't know at all what she wants and invites men at her place to "hang out" while she has a boyfriend and at the same time hangs out with a coworker at her place.

I would stay away from chicks like this, but this advice doesn't work for you, it seems. You are way down the rabbit hole. Sorry/not sorry to break it to you, but someone has to wake you up. Medicine is bitter, but its intent is good.

Wake up.

 

[ticaaa]

Yes, and that is the moment you leave the place. When she invites you at her place and sex isn't on the table, you leave. Not because you're bitter, but because you don't have time to waste with a girl who doesn't know at all what she wants and invites men at her place to "hang out" while she has a boyfriend and at the same time hangs out with a coworker at her place.

I would stay away from chicks like this, but this advice doesn't work for you, it seems. You are way down the rabbit hole. Sorry/not sorry to break it to you, but someone has to wake you up. Medicine is bitter, but its intent is good.

Wake up.

i will try man
in january when we stopped talking i couldnt eat i couldnt sleep when i was sleeping i was only dreaming about her the entire month sucked for me

 

[lizardking82]

Yeah, I get it, buddy. Your problem is not her. Your problem is somewhere else. You are probably not fulfilled in career or you ain't got something that you really like doing and gets you busy. This girl is not you problem and not the reason you're feeling like this. You're feeling like this since the last thing you counted on rescuing your fragile character and situation was sweet lovemaking with a girl and now that that's not being given to you, it hurts, but it's not this one that hurts, it's all the other things.

Sit down and talk to yourself. Really talk to yourself, don't fake it. Deal with what matters, having sex with this girl won't help you any single bit.

 

[Roober]

i didnt blew it because the massage kept going after that for about 10-15 minutes and after that i tried to grap her ass from under her panties and she took my hand away and said no , i tried kissing her and she didnt respond. And after i asked her "why didnt u let me go further " and she said "the massage was enough "

You have much to learn... all of your responses suggest that she was in complete control of the situation. When a woman lusts for a man, she won't be in control...

A woman that wants sex and that gets on top doesnt just stand there to be massaged she kisses you she is taking her clothes off at least thats how it happened everytime when i was in this situation

And this further illustrates my point above. The women are in control, and probably the main reason you didn't get this one... Here is a good little article to get your started...

http://www.theattractionforums.com/showthread.php?t=102875

 

[dude99]

You are dealing with an attention wh^re who is cheating on her boyfriend and looking to branch swing. Probably to your coworker.

She is a liar. " my bf and i dont get along anymore." She knows to keep you on a string she needs to give you hope. What she is really saying is this " l do have a boyfriend. But i need to justify my bad behaviour by telling you what you want to hear."

More lies. She says nothing is going on between her and the coworker. Come on now. Even you know this is bull$#it.

More lies. Her story conflicts whether she broke up with the bf.

She is a cheater. Has a bf and is screwing the coworker.

Why is she sending you pictures but halting your advances. Because it entertains her to play with your head.

You asked her if she wanted sex. She said no.

I wouldn't waste any more time on this one.

 

[ticaaa]

You are dealing with an attention wh^re who is cheating on her boyfriend and looking to branch swing. Probably to your coworker.

She is a liar. " my bf and i dont get along anymore." She knows to keep you on a string she needs to give you hope. What she is really saying is this " l do have a boyfriend. But i need to justify my bad behaviour by telling you what you want to hear."

More lies. She says nothing is going on between her and the coworker. Come on now. Even you know this is bull$#it.

More lies. Her story conflicts whether she broke up with the bf.

She is a cheater. Has a bf and is screwing the coworker.

Why is she sending you pictures but halting your advances. Because it entertains her to play with your head.

You asked her if she wanted sex. She said no.

I wouldn't waste any more time on this one.

my friends at work say that i shouldnt be upset about the other coworker because she didnt have sex with him either she is just stringing him along just like she was doing to me . I dont know what to think anymore

 

[ticaaa]

Yeah, I get it, buddy. Your problem is not her. Your problem is somewhere else. You are probably not fulfilled in career or you ain't got something that you really like doing and gets you busy. This girl is not you problem and not the reason you're feeling like this. You're feeling like this since the last thing you counted on rescuing your fragile character and situation was sweet lovemaking with a girl and now that that's not being given to you, it hurts, but it's not this one that hurts, it's all the other things.

Sit down and talk to yourself. Really talk to yourself, don't fake it. Deal with what matters, having sex with this girl won't help you any single bit.

im actualy very satisfied with the rest of my life i have a good job earn good money , i go to the gym i look pretty good
i guess the thing that hurts me is that im thinking that she might end up with the other coworker and i dont understand what does he have that i dont
that is killing me inside
and sex in not really a priority to me i mean i would do it no problem as soon as she would agree to but i value feelings more than just physical contact

 

[dude99]

my friends at work say that i shouldnt be upset about the other coworker because she didnt have sex with him either she is just stringing him along just like she was doing to me . I dont know what to think anymore

Think this:

"The next girl won"t be her. Onwards and forward. On to the next one."

 

[ticaaa]

Think this:

"The next girl won"t be her. Onwards and forward. On to the next one."

i went on 2 dates in these 2 months and everytime i was thinking about her . The date was talking i couldnt stop thinking about her
i really need to fix this

 

[dude99]

i went on 2 dates in these 2 months and everytime i was thinking about her . The date was talking i couldnt stop thinking about her
i really need to fix this

That is called oneitus. And yes. Fix this now.