"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Should i take the risk?

Essa Rios

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Hey guys.....I've been dating this girl that i met at a wedding for about a month now. She is by far the hottest chick i've ever dated. My friends are even surprised/jealous i'm dating her. Picture a latina Megan Fox, yeah i finally hit the jackpot.

We have done mostly everything except have sex and it was driving me crazy as i really have wanted to go all the way with her. She has an amazing body and when we mess around she takes off all her clothes expect her thong, while i'm always fully nude really to go.

Yesterday she confess to me that she has vaginal herpes :cry: Thats
why we never went all the way. Of course i was disappointed and also thankfull that she told me before we did it. Because of this i respect her alot.
She goes on to say that an ex gave her to her about a year ago and that she's taking medication to keep it under control.

I'm not sure what to do now. I dont want to take a risk by catching a permanent STD, but she is absolutely sexy as hell and part of me says just go for it with protection of course. I really like her alot, she's funny, smart, beautiful and i know she like me as well as she is always calling to hang out together. But i just cant imagine dating a girl with herpes, i'll never enjoy the sex cause i'll be thinking of getting infected. What would you guys do???
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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DonJuanit0

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herpes can also make sex painfull for her and if you get it too it will be painfull for you too! I would just ask a doctor if a condom can fully protect me and then move on! Don't do it if you don't have an experts opinion...
 

Bible_Belt

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There are a lot of STD threads lately.

Most guys will tell you to run. I have been in the same spot. I moved in with a girl after college who did not realize that she had herpes. Her first outbreak had been treated in a third world country with poor healthcare. They just gave her a cream to put on it without telling her what she had. Then she did not get her second outbreak until two years later when she and I were together. I almost left her. It was not an easy decision, but I stayed. We ended up getting married, and for years, I would run to the bathroom sink after sex to wash my d!ck in peroxide. Every time I got the slightest itch, I would almost have a panic attack.

But I never got it. We never used condoms, either. Herpes is contagious just before and during an outbreak. There is some research that says transmission via asymptomatic viral shedding is possible, but I think that is all theory. Most people spread herpes by not knowing what it is they have. People just think it is a rash or bug bite, or they honestly don't care at all about their partner. If she is in tune with her body, she will feel a tingling sensation just before an outbreak. That is when to not have sex. The meds she is on will reduce the frequency of outbreaks substantially.

I spent hours in a med school library researching the actual odds of catching herpes in a relationship. The best answer I could find was a study of married couples where one partner was HSV+ and the other HSV-. The study concluded that the odds of transmission were about ten percent per year. I was married for seven years, which would have given me a roughly 70% chance of catching it. Thankfully, I never did.

If she is good at avoiding sex during an outbreak, I think you will be ok for a long time. Probably, that is. Just know what you are getting into and be calculated with your risk-taking.
 

Ice882

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Captain said:
For all you know she has other STDs too, ones that even she may not know about.

That's a risk with literally every girl you could ever have sex with.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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