"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Should I start calling?

fancy_pants

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Hi guys, I am by no means a DJ or a player, etc etc. I recently got out of a relationship and started hitting the field again. I went out a few times and I got 3 numbers from maybe 8-8.5s (no real dime pieces) at clubs/bars. Normally I prefer to meet women through friends or on campus, but thought I would give it a shot. However, I would usually text them the next day or the day after next with like "hey we met in sososo, hows it going? :)" , but 3 times I haven't gotten a response. On Sunday I met some chick , got her number, and texted her that last night around 10 and this afternoon, still no response- so this one is pretty much a no go. I am not going to resend her /call her because I certainly don't want to seem needy. I am not too hung up on it, but I am wondering what I should differently. I pretty much have no game other than the fact that I am a decent looking, in shape guy who dresses alright. The numbers that I get were done pretty quickly and I don't really know much about them other than their names. The way I just approach girls is pretty naturally- I see them looking at me, and they seem cute , i walk up to them say

'Hi whatsup" *smile
'im ...' shakes her hand
told her i thought she was kind of cute so I'd come by and say hi
ask some small talk **** like 'are u from this city?"
then make an excuse to leave and find a friend, but promise to come back
come back 10 minutes later, tell them I have to go, but let's go for a drink/coffee sometime. They agree, I ask them their number, punch it in , call it , hug, peck on the cheek, leave.

as you can see.. nothing extravagant. So what should I do differently? Build more of a rapport first? Touch more? Flirt more? Set a plan before I leave or tell them something like "So I will definately call you tomorrow, and we will take it from there" and Call them instead of text?

thnx guys
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Unbridled_Phoenix

Master Don Juan
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Feb 22, 2009
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Since you're recently out of a LTR, approaching in this manner is great practice and great for your confidence. But if it's a girl you'd like to stir something up with, I advise building more rapport. You essentially set up a flake-prone situation when you just banter for a couple minutes and get a number. Why should she call you back? Why should she have any feelings if you just bs'd back and forth for a few?

The trick is to give them enough of you to spark interest and intrigue and leave her wanting more, without hanging around like a hungry dog. I achieve this goal by

1. Being tall dark and handsome
2. Making her feel my energy
3. Cultivating the sense of mystery (= not needy, not attached to outcome, letting her see *sometimes contradictory* pieces of the puzzle)

Sometimes they throw themselves at you and want to fvck that night. You're in control, but anything can happen ;)

Oh, and NO TEXTING. Stop it. It's a stupid, impersonal way to communicate. When you're getting to know each other, the phone is your enemy, use it only to set up a meeting. Texting = your attention at her beck and call
 
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