"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Should I reply?

ARrocket

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I'll be going to college this fall, and I found several girls on facebook that will also be freshman there. Anyway, I've been messaging back and forth with a girl that lives in my city, and I thought I had built some attraction...I asked for her #, and she says "why don't we just stick to facebook for now? We'll see how it goes!"

I originally thought to not even reply, and then contact her again in a week or so. But then, that might make me look like a prick or something. So, if I should reply, what should I reply with? Just a "ok, let's stick to facebook" and keep going? Something C&F? I'm not sure...
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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DonJuan11

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ARrocket said:
I'll be going to college this fall, and I found several girls on facebook that will also be freshman there. Anyway, I've been messaging back and forth with a girl that lives in my city, and I thought I had built some attraction...I asked for her #, and she says "why don't we just stick to facebook for now? We'll see how it goes!"

I originally thought to not even reply, and then contact her again in a week or so. But then, that might make me look like a prick or something. So, if I should reply, what should I reply with? Just a "ok, let's stick to facebook" and keep going? Something C&F? I'm not sure...
"Yes you are right, lets stick to facebook for now and see how it goes. I would never give my number out unless I knew someone through facebook for a while."

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ARrocket

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DonJuan11 said:
"Yes you are right, lets stick to facebook for now and see how it goes. I would never give my number out unless I knew someone through facebook for a while."

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Would have done nicely, except that my # is displayed on my profile :D
 

AKA FLEX

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ARrocket said:
I'll be going to college this fall, and I found several girls on facebook that will also be freshman there. Anyway, I've been messaging back and forth with a girl that lives in my city, and I thought I had built some attraction...I asked for her #, and she says "why don't we just stick to facebook for now? We'll see how it goes!"

I originally thought to not even reply, and then contact her again in a week or so. But then, that might make me look like a prick or something. So, if I should reply, what should I reply with? Just a "ok, let's stick to facebook" and keep going? Something C&F? I'm not sure...
I did college before the whole Facebook craze, but I remember what freshman orientation was like: hookup city. I'm talking a 24 hour per day, 7 day per week meat market. One of the best weeks of my life. Nothing but a bunch of 18-year-old walking hormones trolling around trying to hook up with each other. What more can a young man ask for?

With that said, I think you're wasting your time trying to talk to these chicks on Facebook before you even get to campus. I just don't see how Facebook "pre-macking" will make a bit of difference in how much action you'll see when you actually get to campus. I can't picture these chicks cruising around the inevitable out-of-control parties looking for the guy they met on Facebook.

Enjoy your summer away from the computer and save your game for August. Not that you'll need much of it -- if you can't hook up orientation week, you've got some serious work to do.
 

ARrocket

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AKA FLEX said:
I did college before the whole Facebook craze, but I remember what freshman orientation was like: hookup city. I'm talking a 24 hour per day, 7 day per week meat market. One of the best weeks of my life. Nothing but a bunch of 18-year-old walking hormones trolling around trying to hook up with each other. What more can a young man ask for?

With that said, I think you're wasting your time trying to talk to these chicks on Facebook before you even get to campus. I just don't see how Facebook "pre-macking" will make a bit of difference in how much action you'll see when you actually get to campus. I can't picture these chicks cruising around the inevitable out-of-control parties looking for the guy they met on Facebook.

Enjoy your summer away from the computer and save your game for August. Not that you'll need much of it -- if you can't hook up orientation week, you've got some serious work to do.
I only really bothered with the girls that live in my city. And I wish I could be outdoors, but apparently we have monsoon season here now. sigh.

Maybe I'll just LJBF her (if she hasn't already done it to me :eek: ) and ensure that I know some people right from the start :)
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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BMX

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I'm gonna stop browsing the people in my school's network on facebook before I get there. I probably will never run into a bunch of those girls since it is a big school. I'll just wait it out and see what comes my way when August get here. I will have a lot of new people to meet anyways.
 

ARrocket

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Yeah, I guess I'll just forget about it lol. Although she seems to be interested in sending me super long messages....oh well :)
 

Telos

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She's sending you long messages and you're listening? No interest in further contact? Get out dude. Just ignore her. When she asks why you're not talking to her just respond simply that you're busy with real life relationships. She'll come around and probably give you her number if she has any interest.
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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There is a reason why she didn't give you her number. It's because, she does not really know you!!! For all she knows is your a rapist or stalker. Now, if you were in "person" she could see and judge you by how you act. Then, she would see your not a bad guy and maybe would give up her number.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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BMX

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ARrocket said:
Yeah, I guess I'll just forget about it lol. Although she seems to be interested in sending me super long messages....oh well :)
I keep getting super long e-mails from this chick I cold approached. I never write stories to her but I keep getting them in return. She wants to see a game w/me at her school, but the thing is, my school doesn't play hers and it's 5 hours away. I'll keep chatting via e-mail, but never more than a couple paragraphs on my part, but I get the feeling I won't need her once I start classes and find the selection to be superb at my own school.
 

AKA FLEX

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bmxcetera said:
I keep getting super long e-mails from this chick I cold approached. I never write stories to her but I keep getting them in return. She wants to see a game w/me at her school, but the thing is, my school doesn't play hers and it's 5 hours away. I'll keep chatting via e-mail, but never more than a couple paragraphs on my part, but I get the feeling I won't need her once I start classes and find the selection to be superb at my own school.
I think you come to the right conclusion at the end of your post.

NEVER get into a long-distance relationship in college unless you're 150% sure you're going to marry the girl and stay with her forever.

If you're a good guy and you stay faithful to your out-of-town girlfriend during college, you're basically taking a vow of celibacy during the four easiest years of your life to get laid. Not an easy or fun thing to do, not to mention the whole $4/gallon gas thing on the occasion that you DO make it to see your girlfriend.

You are right, there will be plenty of tail for you in college. If not, all I can say is you picked the wrong school. ;)
 
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