"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Should I reduce time spent with friend?

isasda66

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My best friend introduced me to a girl. Now my only issue is that even though he is in a relationship he's like her emotional sponge. He doesnt go a single day without asking her what she's doing. He is pretty ***** whipped so this new girl loves the attention. And to hang out. She has a few small groups.

I hang out with him 2-3 times a week. Now I dont want to become a regular part of that because I cant seem to isolate her (any ideas?).

Is pulling back and doing other ****/blowing off my friend a good option to not become a regular fixture till I can isolate this girl. For whatever reason its not like he doesnt have others but every plan no matter what he has to call her.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Julian

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bros before hoes

fk that wh0re try an tag team her with ur bro
 

Black Widow Void

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Unfortunately, because your friend is (as you say) "... whipped" you'll highly likely end up in a triangulated situation.
If you make a move on the gal, she's going to be all over your friend to find out about you. And then he might (or might withhold) her thoughts on the matter. You may even feel betrayed if your friend reveals too much about you to her .. or if he withholds info about her, to you.

Then, if something goes awry, she'll talk to the mutual friend about you and your friend will be in a 'loyalty' dilemma. If you see your friend 2-3 times a week, it sounds like a decent friendship. I'd seriously think on this before making a move.
 

MountainSlide

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My best friend introduced me to a girl. Now my only issue is that even though he is in a relationship he's like her emotional sponge. He doesnt go a single day without asking her what she's doing. He is pretty ***** whipped so this new girl loves the attention. And to hang out. She has a few small groups.

I hang out with him 2-3 times a week. Now I dont want to become a regular part of that because I cant seem to isolate her (any ideas?).

Is pulling back and doing other ****/blowing off my friend a good option to not become a regular fixture till I can isolate this girl. For whatever reason its not like he doesnt have others but every plan no matter what he has to call her.
if your friend is romantically interested in her and you jump in and scoop her. That could potentially ruin your friendship, he may not introduce you to women anymore, or could destroy some trust. I wouldn’t move on her without his blessing anyway.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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isasda66

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Unfortunately, because your friend is (as you say) "... whipped" you'll highly likely end up in a triangulated situation.
If you make a move on the gal, she's going to be all over your friend to find out about you. And then he might (or might withhold) her thoughts on the matter. You may even feel betrayed if your friend reveals too much about you to her .. or if he withholds info about her, to you.

Then, if something goes awry, she'll talk to the mutual friend about you and your friend will be in a 'loyalty' dilemma. If you see your friend 2-3 times a week, it sounds like a decent friendship. I'd seriously think on this before making a move.
She is already flirting with me. Unless she is an AW I dont see why I shouldn't make a move.
Hypothetically speaking even if something happens and it doesnt work out, Im not gonna stop him from hanging out with her.


if your friend is romantically interested in her and you jump in and scoop her. That could potentially ruin your friendship, he may not introduce you to women anymore, or could destroy some trust. I wouldn’t move on her without his blessing anyway.
My friend isnt romantically interested in her. He already has a relationship. For whatever reason he doesnt hangout with anyone else besides his gf and a few of us guys. Whenever we guys go out he always makes a point to call her.

I just think becoming to familiar to her wont be good.
 

MountainSlide

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She is already flirting with me. Unless she is an AW I dont see why I shouldn't make a move.
Hypothetically speaking even if something happens and it doesnt work out, Im not gonna stop him from hanging out with her.



My friend isnt romantically interested in her. He already has a relationship. For whatever reason he doesnt hangout with anyone else besides his gf and a few of us guys. Whenever we guys go out he always makes a point to call her.

I just think becoming to familiar to her wont be good.
Okay well in that case. If her interest level for you is high then she’ll make things easy. If she doesn’t make things easy it indicates low interest. Lots of girls will flirt with a guy even though they’re not actually interested.

get her phone number. Then call her and ask her when she’s free to get together for a drink with you. If she does anything other than letting you know when she’s available to do so, then you know that she isn’t interested and you you can say “okay well get in touch when you figure out your schedule, I’ve got to run” end conversation. And don’t agree to her bringing anyone else along.
 
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