Should I quit my job for a lack of respect?

[Pumax]

I work in the office of a large cleaning company. There are three managers, and I share an office with Manager #1.

For some time now, Manager #2, who is the kind of person that constantly makes fun of others, has also started mocking me in front of Manager #1.

One day, while I had my back turned, I could clearly hear them talking and making jokes about me. I was the target of the conversation (they did not talk directly, but by projection).
They usually do this about everyone, being that an employee or a customer or someone like a supplier.

What disappointed me the most was that Manager #1 went along with it.
Like He knew if for a long time, and was making fun of me in the back.
At the same time, I understand they’ve worked together for many years, so maybe that’s part of the reason.





Still, the whole situation makes me feel inadequate and uncomfortable. Now I feel like I’m being laughed at by two people I work with every day. The problem is that I currently don’t have another job opportunity lined up to cover for my cost of living. Also, apart from these two people, everyone else at work treats me normally, and it's a good job for me.



So what would be the best thing to do in this situation? I was thinking

1) Quit because of the lack of respect / possible workplace bullying

2) Ignore, make it pass like I have autism and I had not understood what they did say, for now, and quietly look for another job.

3) Talk to my boss, explain how this affects me, and set clear boundaries about what is and isn’t acceptable.



My main concern is that toxic people exist in almost every workplace, you know, so at the moment I’m leaning more toward option 3 but my doubt is that I could still have problems by working with them... But probably I could be relocated in a new room.



How would you handle this?

 

[Clockwerk50]

What were they saying?

 

[RoadKing_Rabbit]

1) Quit because of the lack of respect / possible workplace bullying

They can't ever rob you of that agency. You could quit RIGHT NOW and then leave a 1 star review on every platform or job site they're associated with.

2) Ignore, make it pass like I have autism and I had not understood what they did say, for now, and quietly look for another job.

Just quietly looking for one wouldn't hurt you any.

3) Talk to my boss, explain how this affects me, and set clear boundaries about what is and isn’t acceptable.

You COULD... I wouldn't do that exactly in this manner. They may laugh at you even more. Or who knows, they might back off entirely and start to respect you more. It could be that they genuinely think that they're just being funny. I know there have been several times throughout my life where I thought someone WAS taking it in sport and thought it was funny. Went on for a few weeks before they told me. I laughed REALLY loud which made them angrier. It wasn't because I was trying to make fun of them more, but because of the irony. I quickly explained that I had no idea it bothered them. We got along great after that. Still play pool every now and then in fact!

How about option #4?

You wait for them to do it again and fire some BS right back. If it's something you might consider funny if you and your friends were talking about someone, maybe relate it to that and own the joke. I'd need to know what they said and what you were doing that they made fun of.

Basically, you make fun of them too. And laugh at them as well. When you get past the "Good morning, it came to my attention", "Have you seen the dust mop?", "We're running low on ____, is there more on order?" and someone goes to "Wow. You look like frankenstein" the threshold between being professional and being personal has been crossed. And it wasn't you that crossed it. Meaning, if they cross into that territory, your conduct with them no longer has to be professional. They already violated that. So snapping back at them would remind them of this.

Or better yet, if one of them puts their hands on you even after you say firmly and politely "don't touch me again." You could grab a finger and contort it. Bet they won't do that again. Works even more in your favor if there are cameras. I'm not a legal expert and I'm not in your situation. I'm just saying how I wouldn't allow people to treat me, no matter what job I worked in. BS is BS.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Steal the customer database, and start your own company by taking their clients.

 

[RoadKing_Rabbit]

Steal the customer database, and start your own company by taking their clients.

That'll be REAL funny!

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Quit. At this point there is no salvaging this.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

If you are in the US you should be documenting it to create a paper trail and seek an employment law attorney for a potential hostile work environment lawsuit.

 

[intricate design]

Well it’s a toxic work environment and it’s common.

So what I‘d do is call them out directly and best to do it in front of as many other workers as possible. I’d make it a nightmare for everyone, including you. But I’m sorta a mean person anyways.

I’d let them know they can be abusive towards me but my goal is to damage them, too. Physical threats are the most effective. Maybe they’ll knock it off. Maybe the owner will finally decide it’s going to damage his business having any of you around.

Id just escalate any abuse and make it in their face and not hide anything. Don’t be quiet at all. Id let the bullies know clearly in clear language I might get fired (and don’t want to be) but I plan to damage you too whether in this office or on the streets I don’t care. I’ll gladly go to jail just to put you in the hospital, even if I’m in the hospital bed next to you.

stuff like that. its possible they’ll lay off or someone might get demoted or replaced. but my first action would be to tell all of this directly to the owner and don’t hold back. Let them know you need this job

basically stand up for yourself no matter what the hell happens because you can’t tolerate any disrespect or abuse. You also have to be a good worker for the owner.

but I’d escalate and let everyone know loud and clear without any doubt to shut t f u and it’s important to vocalize that physical violence is going to occur and you don’t care about the consequences. You need to scare them or they’ll never stop.

 

[Scaramouche]

Hi Pumax,
Naah,Jobs are just too hard to find,Pride goeth before a fall...Humility is no burden to carry.

 

[corrector]

Quitting immediately sounds premature. You overheard something hurtful, but I wouldn’t burn down a good job over one incident.


I’ll give my own example. I once ended up on leave after workplace pressure piled on top of heavy caregiving responsibilities and psychological strain I was already carrying outside work. The workplace issue wasn’t the only problem — it landed on top of everything else happening in life and pushed me past my limit.


Sometimes stepping away temporarily, if someone is genuinely overwhelmed and medically (ie mentally) struggling, creates space for things to improve or settle down. Sometimes workplaces change on their own too.


But I wouldn’t quit quickly over this unless there’s a larger pattern.

 

[Mike32ct]

Quitting immediately sounds premature. You overheard something hurtful, but I wouldn’t burn down a good job over one incident.

But I wouldn’t quit quickly over this unless there’s a larger pattern.

Agree.

Even bosses that like you will talk shyte about you sometimes. They gossip about everybody, even their favorites. Not saying it’s right, but it happens.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Agree.

Even bosses that like you will talk shyte about you sometimes. They gossip about everybody, even their favorites. Not saying it’s right, but it happens.

We do not even know what the bosses were saying about OP or what he heard. That’s why I asked what they were saying about him, since 9/10 times it is most likely that the person complaining/ranting is being “overly sensitive.”

 

[OngBak]

I dont let Authority disrespect me

 

[Rocky_Hendrix]

just read 48 laws of power...

 

[Prepostereax]

If you intend to move on, do so for positive reasons
ie moving on to employment that in some crucial way, will improve your life and goals

It could be that your new job has better pay and conditions, but you may find that it's even more toxic.
What then?

Other reasons could be that travel time is cut significantly.
Promotion opportunities more abundant (usually means doing higher duties when called for)
Or provides opportunities to skill up
Or maybe perks are more attractive
Maybe it gives you better exposure to hot chicks

So long as you are going somewhere that advances you in some way

As opposed to negative reasons, ie running from something
Because you may find that thing wherever you go

My main concern is that toxic people exist in almost every workplace

You have to think of most workmates as "crabs in a bucket"