"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Should I continue this??

B-Real

Don Juan
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Ok, I met this girl earlier this summer. I met her in my hometown. Come to find out she goes to the same college as I do. She goes back home every weekend to hang out with my friends.

When she is in college town she wants to hang out with me. She will call and want to go the same places as I do, but nothing has happened sexually ever.
Like she will call me and tell me to meet her somewhere and it may be at 2:00am (like tonight) but once I get there nothing happens.

I hate to break everything off because I like her as a person. Its almost like I hate to say its over as friends because I want her as a companion even if nothing sexual happens that way at least I have a girl to hang out with.

Its kinda sad on my part though because I want her to be around just so I can be around a hot girl, even though nothing sexual has happened, and it doesn't seem like its going too.

What should I do??
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
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Well have you ever tried kino on her or made any kind of move on her at all signaling your interest in her as more than friends?

Also you don't have to get rid of her if you enjoy her company as a friend and plus its quite possible you could use her to set you up with one of her hot friends or for social proof.
 

B-Real

Don Juan
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Haha thats basically what I've been doing. I like the idea of the social proof thing. And yes I have applied kino a couple of times. Ok here's the situation.

I want to progress things towards something physical. But I don't want to because once I make a move on her and she doesn't take too well to it, then everytime we meet it will be weird.

It will be like "oh I think its so cute how he has a crush on me" or something like that. In a sense it would put her on a pedestal. Especially between me and her.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

JJMcLure

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 15, 2002
Messages
840
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Like already said, the best thing to do is use her as social proof and also get to some hot friends of hers. If she won't introduce you to them or you find she never has you and them around at the same time, that's a red flag.

Right now it sounds like you're just her backup guy for attention. In that case it's unlikely you have a chance of progressing this to something physical. If you want to try it, you will find out she won't hate you for it (she already knows you want her), in fact she would probably respect you more if she assumes you don't have the guts to make a move. You find her attractive, you want to make a move - it's natural. It's MORE unusual for a guy and a chick to hang out late at night on many occassions WITHOUT something happening.

But if you get rejected, you might not want to be around her (which could actually be a good thing if this is really getting to you). She will only think you have a "crush" if you act wimpy or spill a bunch of emotions on her or are hurt by a rejection. So, DO NOT start verbalising your feelings - you try to kiss her, if she rejects it then that's it end of story, no asking for explanations etc.

On a more general note, if you want something physical to happen with a chick, it's your job to make it happen.
 
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