"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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should i be worried

bcollarmechanic

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alright so heres the sh1tty situation, this weekend me and a few buddies went out bar hoping for my bday which was a few weeks ago, after hitting a few bars and getting a good buzz on we decide to hit the local strip club, strip club was packed and they told us they were at maximum capacity and said to come back in an hour

instead my friends said they had a better surprise for me and took me to an Asian message place, my friends offered to pay for a "happy ending" and i thought screw it why not

so they pay, but without me knowing they made an extra surprise and paid for us to get the "full service"

the girl starts out by showering you, then giving you a message then rubbing your private, then she slipped a condom on and started sucking me off, i didnt think anything of it, but then she jumped on top and started riding me, i was so caught off guard and drunk that it probably took me a good 30secs - minute before i pushed her off, i didnt finish in her

now im scared i might of caught something like herpes or hpv, i dont have any symptoms but still scared as i know most men dont show symptoms for that stuff

my friends told me im being paranoid and not to worry because we wore condoms, but i know that condoms arent full proof at protecting from the stds mentioned above

im thinking about getting tested but i was never tested before manly because ive never been very sexually active, including the message place that was my fourth lay

think theres a good chance i caught something or am i just being paranoid?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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ChemGod

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lol damn bro, herpies is for life. Did you notice any symptoms from her? I think the condom may have been enough, as long as her secretions did not get on any other part of your body, you didnt drink her breast milk, and didnt have any open cuts that the secretions could have entered, you should be good.
 

Chico

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I read that the chances of getting herpes from one random occasion of intercourse is like 3%. Now, if a condom is used and it does its job properly (e.g., it does not tear), then the chances are much less than that.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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way2smart

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bcollarmechanic said:
think theres a good chance i caught something or am i just being paranoid?
You are being extremely paranoid. All of us have herpes virus. I mean the one from which you get cold sores. Genital herpes is not very common, about 16% of population has it and it is only infectious in "active" phase, that's when you will see blisters around her vagina. If you didn't see any blisters, you are probably fine, because even if she had it, it would have been latent meaning not contagious. It's still possible to get infected in "inactive" stage however it's extremely rare.
 
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