Should I be frustrated?

captain55

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Met a girl had a great first date. Seemed smart and educated and like she had her **** together.

Had something planned at the beach and we were hit with an earthquake ruined the plans. She asked to reschedule I said ok.

She hits me up the same afternoon and asked what I was doing that night. I said I’m busy tonight but we can work out together tomorrow. Next morning She changes her mind about working out but asks me if I want to go to a baseball game with her that night. I said sure...Anyways she ends up cancelling it.

At this point I’m pissed because she wasted my whole ****ing day. I let her know it and told her to get her ass more organized.

She apologized and offered for me to go to her friends birthday party the next day. Impressed by the effort I agree to it after I cooled off.

This morning she tells me the party is off. And she screenshots me the text of her friend (to prove she’s not lying). So it wasn’t her fault per say but I’m still too pissed to follow up. I said ok let me know when your done with brunch with your girlfriends she said ok

I contact her a few hours later and she’s ****faced drunk with her friends at brunch.


What do I do in this situation? She is pretty much scratched off the list as potential girlfriend unless she’s amazing in bed and can cook. But I do need to find a way to bang her without losing my temper at this point because I’m about to curse her out.
 
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Robert28

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I don’t like y’alls date ideas whatsoever. Working out the second date? Uh no. Meeting her friends the second date? Uh hell no. The baseball game would have been good.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Met a girl had a great first date. Seemed smart and educated and like she had her **** together.

Had something planned at the beach and we were hit with an earthquake ruined the plans. She asked to reschedule I said ok.

She hits me up the same afternoon and asked what I was doing that night. I said I’m busy tonight but we can work out together tomorrow. Next morning She changes her mind about working out but asks me if I want to go to a baseball game with her that night. I said sure...Anyways she ends up cancelling it.

At this point I’m pissed because she wasted my whole ****ing day. I let her know it and told her to get her ass more organized.

She apologized and offered for me to go to her friends birthday party the next day. Impressed by the effort I agree to it after I cooled off.

This morning she tells me the party is off. And she screenshots me the text of her friend (to prove she’s not lying). So it wasn’t her fault per say but I’m still too pissed to follow up. I said ok let me know when your done with brunch with your girlfriends she said ok

I contact her a few hours later and she’s ****faced drunk with her friends at brunch.


What do I do in this situation? She is pretty much scratched off the list as potential girlfriend unless she’s amazing in bed and can cook. But I do need to find a way to bang her without losing my temper at this point because I’m about to curse her out.
She's spinning plates and you're waiting at her beck and call.


Not doing it right kuz. You should be frustrated at the guy in the mirror.
 

captain55

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She's spinning plates and you're waiting at her beck and call.


Not doing it right kuz. You should be frustrated at the guy in the mirror.
She is probably spinning plates. What hot girl isn’t. But today’s situation, inviting me to a birthday party for her friend and her friend changing the plans around. Then getting **** faced and telling me “I’m so lit right now” What can I do?

I have other plates, got head from one after she bailed....but none I have high interest in so they won’t do much good.

Also, not to sound like a ****y ******* but I know this chick is from downtown la. I’d be willing to bet a lot of money whatever plates she spinning don’t have the status or money that I do so to me I feel like she’s an idiot for messing this up. I’m the guy that can take her out of that ****ty area so she’s an idiot. Obviously I can’t tell her “I feel like I’m above you and out of your league your lucky I’m talking to you so get your **** together “ but that’s how I feel. She went to a good college and made herself out to be this smart chick with her **** together but the dumb chick from the hood is coming out and I’m losing some of the attraction to her
 
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xuzaki

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I'm guessing she's young and in her Party Years phase (see the Rational Male for explanation). She's interested in the Alpha Fvcks side of hypergamy. In other words, she doesn't care at all about your money and status.

You could turn up the jerk-behavior. Don't get pissed at her, but cancel a date on her with no explanation. And stop letting her lead you. Sure the dates aren't great, but worse is that she's suggesting them.

Obviously I can’t tell her “I feel like I’m above you and out of your league your lucky I’m talking to you so get your **** together “ but that’s how I feel.
I think this mindset will hinder you. She has something you want, and you have something she obviously doesn't want that much. If she wanted to, she could have seen you multiple times by now. So definitely focus on your behavior, and you might as well pretend you're a poor poolboy because the status isn't appearing to attract her.
 
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Glassguy

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What do I do in this situation?
Simple solution:

Wait for her to reach back out. If/when she does, tell her that she can come over and hang out with you and have a drink on X evening. Pick an evening that you have nothing going on so you are out nothing if she flakes again.

She spent your offer to "take her out". Now its only "come chill" until she does that a couple of times and works her way back up the ladder.

Edit: Dont mention getting together AT ALL when she reaches back out. Drop that on her flaky @SS as soon as she mentions getting together. But dont be the first to bring it up.
 

markfromeurope

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If you'd be perceived as high value by her, she would find time just for you and she would do it promptly.

One need to understand that:
- spending time together 1-on-1 in prioritised way (yours and her attention is focused primarily on yourselves - whether its mountain hiking together, going to restaurant together, doing shopping together and sleeping together)

Level of 1-on-1 attention given It is the most significant clue that you are fully accepted by a woman.

However no one has seen what exactly you wrote her and trust me my friend, woman read between the lines a lot - if you gave her vibe she didn't like about you, you are wasting your time analysing dead end (IMO you should forget about her, something screams here insta-validation mechanism meaning she gets off on wasting your time and only you can properly assess why she does and what has happened - that is if you are able to do it with the information you have - sometimes woman is like that because of her previous experience (like being played) so the next guy gets the lesson she would like to give the former one.

Which means that most probably you are drinking ****tail of piss that was prepared for the other guy - the one that actually scored her and disengaged afterwards. Enjoy.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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She is probably spinning plates. What hot girl isn’t. But today’s situation, inviting me to a birthday party for her friend and her friend changing the plans around. Then getting **** faced and telling me “I’m so lit right now” What can I do?
Next her.

I have other plates, got head from one after she bailed....but none I have high interest in so they won’t do much good.
That's flawed thinking or made up.

A man doesn't get his proteins digested and he rages out on a forum. Not real life.

I lead. She follows or next. Repeat till dead. Lose her digits. #nextSet #micdrop

Also, not to sound like a ****y ******* but I know this chick is from downtown la. I’d be willing to bet a lot of money whatever plates she spinning don’t have the status or money that I do so to me I feel like she’s an idiot for messing this up. I’m the guy that can take her out of that ****ty area so she’s an idiot. Obviously I can’t tell her “I feel like I’m above you and out of your league your lucky I’m talking to you so get your **** together “ but that’s how I feel. She went to a good college and made herself out to be this smart chick with her **** together but the dumb chick from the hood is coming out and I’m losing some of the attraction to her
And yet, she's a no show.

All you can control is your actions. You can do your part. If she does not bite, she's dead to you. You can go get more girls.

Her value is below zero if she's a flake. If she tests you and no shows and yoyr response is waiting for her, it tells her that you are a beta cuck. Not a outlier.

Delete #. She can hit you up. But you're too busy hitting on hotter girls. She's not 18. She's decaying her SMV.

Corrective action is to step your game up. Options are to be the solution to girl problems and a man can never have enough option in the game.


You're not doing it right. Far to high on agreeableness and openness. She is a dud. Drop her. She is difficult. You're supposed to be a challenge.

Women will claw out the eyes of every man woman and child on a path through barb wire and broken glass to get to the alpha male. You've proven to her, you are not that man. Meanwhile hotter girls are turning 18 19 20 21 every day.

Act accordingly .
 

captain55

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Update for anyone who cares. I told her she pissed me off with not communicating....She sent me this

“You are completely right and it was absolutely my fault. I drank way more than I could handle and I was not responsible enough to reach out to you or let you know what was up. For that I am truly sorry and I was hoping to see you today. I’m very sorry.”

Lol. I found this kind of funny. She’s been out with me once and doesn’t owe me anything her response was a bit over the top. Either she’s a complete bull****ter or has some weird daddy issue I’m sensing/gets off to guys being mad at her.
 

captain55

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I'm guessing she's young and in her Party Years phase (see the Rational Male for explanation). She's interested in the Alpha Fvcks side of hypergamy. In other words, she doesn't care at all about your money and status.

You could turn up the jerk-behavior. Don't get pissed at her, but cancel a date on her with no explanation. And stop letting her lead you. Sure the dates aren't great, but worse is that she's suggesting them.


I think this mindset will hinder you. She has something you want, and you have something she obviously doesn't want that much. If she wanted to, she could have seen you multiple times by now. So definitely focus on your behavior, and you might as well pretend you're a poor poolboy because the status isn't appearing to attract her.

This p
Next her.



That's flawed thinking or made up.

A man doesn't get his proteins digested and he rages out on a forum. Not real life.

I lead. She follows or next. Repeat till dead. Lose her digits. #nextSet #micdrop



And yet, she's a no show.

All you can control is your actions. You can do your part. If she does not bite, she's dead to you. You can go get more girls.

Her value is below zero if she's a flake. If she tests you and no shows and yoyr response is waiting for her, it tells her that you are a beta cuck. Not a outlier.

Delete #. She can hit you up. But you're too busy hitting on hotter girls. She's not 18. She's decaying her SMV.

Corrective action is to step your game up. Options are to be the solution to girl problems and a man can never have enough option in the game.


You're not doing it right. Far to high on agreeableness and openness. She is a dud. Drop her. She is difficult. You're supposed to be a challenge.

Women will claw out the eyes of every man woman and child on a path through barb wire and broken glass to get to the alpha male. You've proven to her, you are not that man. Meanwhile hotter girls are turning 18 19 20 21 every day.

Act accordingly .

Don’t agree with all of that. The chick is a 9, I may see a 9/10 one in every 3 times I go out if I’m lucky. I can’t just go out and get a chick that hot in one weekend because they are too rare.

No offense but you sound inexperienced with extremely hot women. A girl that is a 7 May claw her way to get to an Alpha male but a true 9 has nothing but alpha males after her ...could be even 20-30 at once. Expecting to bang every hot chick you go up to just because you’ve banged Women that hot in the past is just setting yourself up for disappointment. There will always be some guy better and that’s life. I’ve also been on the opposite end of the spectrum and been that guy to get the crazy hot chick when I knew damn well there were dudes after her 6’3 and probably more handsome than me. A 9 May crawl through barb wire for that one guy that is 6’2 and has movie star good looks but that is not 99.9% of the male population. Most guys will need to put some work in/persistence to date and bang women in the 8 and up category if they are not this top 1%
 
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DEEZEDBRAH

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This p



Don’t agree with all of that. The chick is a 9, I may see a 9/10 one in every 3 times I go out if I’m lucky. I can’t just go out and get a chick that hot in one weekend because they are too rare.

No offense but you sound inexperienced with extremely hot women. A girl that is a 7 May claw her way to get to an Alpha male but a true 9 has nothing but alpha males after her ...could be even 20-30 at once. Expecting to bang every hot chick you go up to just because you’ve banged Women that hot in the past is just setting yourself up for disappointment. There will always be some guy better and that’s life. I’ve also been on the opposite end of the spectrum and been that guy to get the crazy hot chick when I knew damn well there were dudes after her 6’3 and probably more handsome than me. A 9 May crawl through barb wire for that one guy that is 6’2 and has movie star good looks but that is not 99.9% of the male population. Most guys will need to put some work in/persistence to date and bang women in the 8 and up category if they are not this top 1%
9 no show? Not doing it right. I don't care if 15/10. She is road kill if a no show.

Step your game up. Excusing ****ty behaviour because she's pretty? Thats soft as baby ****.
 

markfromeurope

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Don't agree with all of that. The chick is a 9, I may see a 9/10 one in every 3 times I go out if I’m lucky. I can’t just go out and get a chick that hot in one weekend because they are too rare.

No offense but you sound inexperienced with extremely hot women. A girl that is a 7 May claw her way to get to an Alpha male but a true 9 has nothing but alpha males after her ...could be even 20-30 at once. Expecting to bang every hot chick you go up to just because you’ve banged Women that hot in the past is just setting yourself up for disappointment. There will always be some guy better and that’s life. I’ve also been on the opposite end of the spectrum and been that guy to get the crazy hot chick when I knew damn well there were dudes after her 6’3 and probably more handsome than me. A 9 May crawl through barb wire for that one guy that is 6’2 and has movie star good looks but that is not 99.9% of the male population. Most guys will need to put some work in/persistence to date and bang women in the 8 and up category if they are not this top 1%
If you are well established/handsome enough, her looks doesn't matter when it comes to overall rules of the game.

She checked your level od interest (obviously very high) and level of your self-respect (average) and decided its enough for her to let you be her reserve option no X.

She prefered to get drunk with her friends over meeting with you - you should treat her as entirely reserve option (model-looks or not) and stop thinking about her - currently there's nothing between you and It may remain like that and that's something you need to accept.

In the meantime you should think over her attitude towards you and your reactions - I doubt that you would be so tolerant towards such behavior if she wasn't a woman - sure you can (and you should) let some female BS under your radar AFTER you have sex with her, but before? That's something you need to think about.
 

sosousage

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Met a girl had a great first date. Seemed smart and educated and like she had her **** together.

Had something planned at the beach and we were hit with an earthquake ruined the plans. She asked to reschedule I said ok.

She hits me up the same afternoon and asked what I was doing that night. I said I’m busy tonight but we can work out together tomorrow. Next morning She changes her mind about working out but asks me if I want to go to a baseball game with her that night. I said sure...Anyways she ends up cancelling it.

At this point I’m pissed because she wasted my whole ****ing day. I let her know it and told her to get her ass more organized.

She apologized and offered for me to go to her friends birthday party the next day. Impressed by the effort I agree to it after I cooled off.

This morning she tells me the party is off. And she screenshots me the text of her friend (to prove she’s not lying). So it wasn’t her fault per say but I’m still too pissed to follow up. I said ok let me know when your done with brunch with your girlfriends she said ok

I contact her a few hours later and she’s ****faced drunk with her friends at brunch.


What do I do in this situation? She is pretty much scratched off the list as potential girlfriend unless she’s amazing in bed and can cook. But I do need to find a way to bang her without losing my temper at this point because I’m about to curse her out.
shes making fun of you and laughing with her friends at how thirsty you are while youre walking in circles waiting for your queens messages.

u should tell her after first flake that you find your 40yo single mom plate more attractive than her and block her
 

marmel75

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You are way more invested than she is. This will end badly for you.
 

Glassguy

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With the proper IDGAF attitude (while still coming across as fun/outgoing/charismatic) this stuff is much less likely to happen.
“You are completely right and it was absolutely my fault. I drank way more than I could handle and I was not responsible enough to reach out to you or let you know what was up. For that I am truly sorry and I was hoping to see you today. I’m very sorry.”
This says nothing. No mention of her asking to get together, coming over to make it up, nothing. It doesnt even warrant a response. At the most it should get an "Ok hun". Thats it.

Edit: Dont mention getting together AT ALL when she reaches back out. Drop that on her flaky @SS as soon as she mentions getting together. But dont be the first to bring it up.
I gave you solid advice. All you have to do is follow it. Its as easy as connect the dots.

At this point it seems you have partially failed her availability test. The fact that she may be testing you at all shows low interest. She should be making it easy to get her out if her interest through the roof.

OP- I have seen pics you've posted on here. Not to sound gay (I am 150% straight) but you are a good looking dude. You fail because you dont come across with a true IDGAF attitude. You cant fake that shyte. You have to develop it. You obviously do hard work to be in good shape but you would get much further with chicks doing what YOU want if you put some time and energy into properly developing your mindset. You have literally started so many threads where different chicks cause you to be confused by their behavior.

You are getting initial interest based on physical attraction. Do the math. They fall back because you dont have the right mindset.....yet.

Sorry to be harsh, but those are the facts based on your previous threads.
 
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captain55

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If you'd be perceived as high value by her, she would find time just for you and she would do it promptly.

One need to understand that:
- spending time together 1-on-1 in prioritised way (yours and her attention is focused primarily on yourselves - whether its mountain hiking together, going to restaurant together, doing shopping together and sleeping together)

Level of 1-on-1 attention given It is the most significant clue that you are fully accepted by a woman.

However no one has seen what exactly you wrote her and trust me my friend, woman read between the lines a lot - if you gave her vibe she didn't like about you, you are wasting your time analysing dead end (IMO you should forget about her, something screams here insta-validation mechanism meaning she gets off on wasting your time and only you can properly assess why she does and what has happened - that is if you are able to do it with the information you have - sometimes woman is like that because of her previous experience (like being played) so the next guy gets the lesson she would like to give the former one.

Which means that most probably you are drinking ****tail of piss that was prepared for the other guy - the one that actually scored her and disengaged afterwards. Enjoy.
I agree with you 100%. And not to say I haven’t made the mistakes you mention with women before but this one was different. I pretty much called her after the first time I met her and said “be ready at 11am tomorrow I’m picking you up”

During the entire first date, she seemed nervous and going out of her way to impress me. Basically I got the vibe from her “this guy is the best I’m going to do, I better not **** it up”. All over me, feeding me oysters, kissing me. Almost to the point where It was too much. I didn’t listen to everything she said either I acted nonchalant because I thought I had it in the bag.

She asked me out the following Friday and I didn’t cancel my original plans with my friends to go see her either. So it’s not like I made myself overavailable
 

RangerMIke

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Don't read too much into it. All it means is that you are not a priority at any given moment. As far as women doing stuff like this? Where have you been? Chicks do this all the freaking time... it is completely normal air-headed chick behavior. Calling them out on this is a waste of time... they aren't fvcking stupid, they know it is wrong to cancel plans at the last minute... she doing it to you because she doesn't fvcking care. If I don;t get flaked on at least a couple of times a month I think something is wrong.

When I tell you what to do I am not kidding... I do this all the time. I never invite a chick to anything that I am not prepared to go alone if she flakes.... If it's a concert... and I have two tickets... and she flakes... not problem I'll just ring up a friend and take them... a dance or a ball.. again... no problem, I'll just call my cousin... you see where I'm going with this? I do not expect them to show-up... I really don't, if they do great! She passes. Courtship and dating are just one long test to the bedroom... Her actually showing up on time is a test... if she doesn't pass... well you can give her a make-up test but if she flakes again... tell her if she ever gets her flaky @ss sh!t together to give you a call... then it's off to the next one.
 

captain55

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With the proper IDGAF attitude (while still coming across as fun/outgoing/charismatic) this stuff is much less likely to happen.

This says nothing. No mention of her asking to get together, coming over to make it up, nothing. It doesnt even warrant a response. At the most it should get an "Ok hun". Thats it.


I gave you solid advice. All you have to do is follow it. Its as easy as connect the dots.

At this point it seems you have partially failed her availability test. The fact that she may be testing you at all shows low interest. She should be making it easy to get her out if her interest through the roof.

OP- I have seen pics you've posted on here. Not to sound gay (I am 150% straight) but you are a good looking dude. You fail because you dont come across with a true IDGAF attitude. You cant fake that shyte. You have to develop it. You obviously do hard work to be in good shape but you would get much further with chicks doing what YOU want if you put some time and energy into properly developing your mindset. You have literally started so many threads where different chicks cause you to be confused by their behavior.

You are getting initial interest based on physical attraction. Do the math. They fall back because you dont have the right mindset.....yet.

Sorry to be harsh, but those are the facts based on your previous threads.
I agree with you on many levels. But isn’t there a difference pursuing a girl with confidence vs desperation? My current plate, I have wrapped around my finger. A year ago she was ignoring me like crazy and I was chasing her. She was flaking on me. I finally banged her and now a year later the tables flipped and I pretty much have her on call as a **** buddy. I’ve been in the same situation and have come out on top before so I don’t want to give up cause life has taught me otherwise
 

ItsFate451

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I don’t like y’alls date ideas whatsoever. Working out the second date? Uh no. Meeting her friends the second date? Uh hell no. The baseball game would have been good.

Exactly. Never hang out with a girl and her friends until you know she’s in love with you. He’s setting himself up to be ignored the entire time.
 

Glassguy

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I agree with you on many levels. But isn’t there a difference pursuing a girl with confidence vs desperation? My current plate, I have wrapped around my finger. A year ago she was ignoring me like crazy and I was chasing her. She was flaking on me. I finally banged her and now a year later the tables flipped and I pretty much have her on call as a **** buddy. I’ve been in the same situation and have come out on top before so I don’t want to give up cause life has taught me otherwise
There is definitely a difference. But understand that from how you have worded some of this post, you've already put this chick on a pedestal to some extent.
The chick is a 9, I may see a 9/10 one in every 3 times I go out if I’m lucky. I can’t just go out and get a chick that hot in one weekend because they are too rare.
See what I mean?

So the plate you treat as if you really dont care.....and you cant run her off. Because at the end of the day you could care less if she leaves or not.

I'm guessing the plate is no 9 but still attractive.

Being too available, too chatty, etc can take a woman who had an interest of 7 in you down to a 5 and flake. When it comes to splitting hairs, it's best to have a rotation of women that see you as a 9. Its theirs to fvck up....not your problem.

Not saying don't go after 9s, but understand that your game (and mentality) have to be flawless to not only avoid lowering her interest at some point but also possibly increasing it.

A 9 has many more options to compare you too....that's where the hair splitting starts. Shes weeding out the dudes that want a contract on her pvssy.
 
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