"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Should I ask this girl out on another date or wait for her to initiate?

pr3167

Don Juan
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We’re both seniors in high school. I’ve known this girl for a while, and she’s started to demonstrate a lot of interest in me so we’ve hung out alone the past couple of weekends. Two weeks ago on Friday, I went to her house to watch a movie. Her parents were out, but her younger brother was in the basement so we couldn’t have sex, but we did end up making out for half an hour on her couch (this was the first time we kissed). I texted her the next day saying good luck for her dance recital that day, and she responded by saying thanks and to have a great day. We had a short text conversation on Sunday, and didn’t talk too much other than that.

Last Wednesday, she texts me saying that her and some friends were planning on buying tickets to a concert in May and she was wondering if I wanted to go with them. I told her I was down to go, and set up a date to go ice skating that Friday. So we ended up going. It was the first time I’ve ever ice-skated, so I was pretty bad at it, but she taught me some and it was a good opportunity for a lot of kino. After ice skating, we went to get ice cream, and ended up making out again in the back of my car before we went home.

I haven’t talked to or really seen her since then. We never really see each other in school, so our only communication comes from texting or hanging out on the weekends. Should I text her to set up a date for this weekend, or should I wait for her to initiate? Valentine's day is coming up and I'm going to have to ask her to prom eventually, and I'd want to at least have sex with her before doing anything romantic with her.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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RangerMIke

Master Don Juan
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Ask her out, don't wait for her.

Don't worry about Valentines day, your not in a relationship. If you think you have to get her something just get her a friendly card and write something funny in it.
 

SummerNight

Don Juan
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Feb 2, 2015
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Lol, having sex is not romantic? :D Anyways, seems that she likes you so it's all good. It would be ok to initiate again. Don't worry about her not asking you out. Some girls never ask guys out and she did invite you to the concert so she id def seeing you in a long term picture.
 
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